Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
THEO
Somehow in the past two hours, I’ve signed up to be a landlord and a teacher. Given I tend to keep to myself, the first predicament is one I’m sure I’ll get used to, but the second will be much harder.
I don’t play well with others. Throw on top of that the decades of slang and cultural changes I’ve missed out on, I’m most certainly hopeless when it comes to communicating with those from the modern world.
The only practice I get is with Aidan, and Joanna wasn’t wrong: he’s nearly as ancient as I am.
How in the nine circles of hell am I going to teach this ghost how to live an efficient afterlife?
So far, Kennedy doesn’t appear to take things too seriously, despite her circumstances—the occasional chaff proving as much.
It’s possible that I can work with this.
If I had a simpering idiot or a distraught doll in front of me, I think I’d bow out before beginning.
But Kennedy seems determined to get to the point, and anything beyond that isn’t reaching her radar.
Like right now, she’s peering at me, wide-eyed in anticipation, waiting for the answers to all her problems to spill spontaneously from my mouth.
I take a long, deep inhale, considering where to start.
There’s an art to living the same day on repeat, like a slideshow on a broken projector, cursed to loop endlessly for all eternity.
I had my opportunity to pass through the pearly gates, just like everyone else before me, but I chose to stay.
Not because of any unfinished business, and definitely not because of some insane determination to hang on to what I had (unlike a certain mayor in town).
Truthfully, it was my guilt that kept me here.
I couldn’t face the idea that my sins would go unpunished, so I accepted my fate.
For Kennedy, acceptance of her circumstances will be the first step in embracing her new reality.
Aidan told me once that addicts go through several steps before they’re recovered, and acknowledging the problem is the first step.
For me, accepting and acknowledging my reality was a crucial step to not going insane.
“First, I want you to lose any notion of ‘fixing’ anything,” I tell her.
“You are dead. If by some miracle, you find a bright light at the end of a random tunnel and feel the need to follow, by all means, happy travels. But the reality of your circumstances is that most of us aren’t so lucky.
We appear and linger where we do because of some higher reason that I’ve yet to fully understand, and I don’t plan on wasting my time doing so. I suggest you don’t either.”
I turn from her and begin pacing along the stiff floorboards of the library. She takes the opportunity to climb the last three steps and enter the room fully.
“It might feel like a jail sentence, but you can learn to make the most of it. Obviously, from what you’ve observed, we are able to interact with the living. They can see us, and upon our permission, touch us.”
“Yes, but how exactly?” She interrupts.
I absentmindedly stroke my chin. “Concentration, mostly. And you must want to do it.”
She fumbles, shifting her cream-colored sweater that’s fallen over her shoulder. “But I tried that. No matter how much I willed myself to touch my sister,” she gulps dejectedly but continues, “I just couldn’t. But here, in the cafe, it just happened.”
“Willing yourself to do something and wanting to are two different things. It’s deeper. You have to trust your spirit—it controls everything now.”
“Like trusting your gut?”
I tilt my head, considering. “Sometimes. But the core of it is being honest with yourself.”
Kennedy’s mouth falls open slightly, a clear epiphany forming behind her focused gaze. My own gut tells me it’s about her sister, but I don’t pry. It rankles me that I want to.
She swiftly changes the subject. “Alright, so that covers the whole touching thing, what about traveling? The witches said I can leave the house.”
My stomach lurches, but I answer honestly. “Yes. You can go anywhere in Shadow Hills that you like.”
Just because I have no interest in doing so doesn’t mean I should hold her back. I should want her out of the house as often as possible.
She laughs and mimics wiping sweat from her brow. “Phew! For a minute there, I thought we were going to have to become real close, real fast.”
Her eyes crinkle jovially, so I try not to take it personally.
I watch her wander over to the large window and peer down onto the grounds. “It’s lovely here. Like a storybook, with all the snow.”
She looks at me subserviently. “Can I go outside and look around?”
“You don’t need my permission.”
Her face lights up, and she scurries back down the stairs. I lose sight of her bright red hair after about the twelfth step down. Listening closely, I hear the front door open quietly. Walking slowly to the window, I wait anxiously for the top of her head to appear against the stark white scenery.
When it does, my chest clinches. The feeling doesn’t sit right, so I look away. For a moment, I forgot about my plan to keep to myself, but it was simply natural curiosity, nothing more.
I’ll be here to answer her questions, but after today, this new ghost is on her own.