Chapter 27
twenty-seven
WILL
I’m still gripping the counter, eyes squeezed shut. All I can hear is the heavy rasp of my breath, the pounding of the blood in my ears.
Lydia’s mom is gone. The only trace of her is the shattered shards of energy—what used to be my wall—that curl around my feet like plumes of silvery smoke.
“Will,” Zeke breathes. He’s backed against the fridge. “What. The actual. Fuck.”
I glance at him, but I don’t answer. I’m suddenly hit with a wave of exhaustion so intense it feels like I might never catch my breath. The room is still echoing.
The thing is, despite how absolutely wrecked I feel, there’s something electric coursing through me.
The blue of Zeke’s eyes is more vivid. The moonlight streaming in through the window is brighter, more defined.
Even my body feels more alive, like it’s been hit with a sudden pulse of starlight, and I’ve sobered up completely.
If I listen, I can feel the whisper of spirits around me, crawling over my skin. Making themselves known.
After nineteen years, the wall is gone. And I’m unfiltered, undiluted.
My voice breaks the silence as I turn to Zeke. “Did you… see that? Or did I just feel it?”
Zeke huffs out a shaky laugh. “Oh, I saw it. That shit was crazy. What was that?”
“It was… that was Lydia’s mom. The spirit.”
“The librarian?”
“Yeah. She died when Lydia was ten. The library was Lydia’s connection to her mom—that’s what this whole thing is about. And now Lydia’s mom showed up here, to me, and…”
“Okay, but what the hell was that… that…” Zeke waves a hand wildly, trying to find the right word. “That explosion?! You shut your eyes all tight and started breathing all heavy, and I legit thought you were dying, and then suddenly there’s this silvery fucking fireworks show in your kitchen!”
I rub my jaw. Zeke’s description of what just happened tracks. That’s about how it all looked in my mind, too.
“That was my wall. Shattering.”
Zeke raises his eyebrows. “Your wall? As in, your keep-the-ghosts-out wall? Holy shit…”
“Yeah.”
“How’d she do it, though? Are you okay? I’ve never had them doing anything against my will before. Not that there’s much they could do that’d be—”
“She didn’t do it. I did. I’m the one who shattered it.”
The realization hits me hard. Saying it out loud makes it real. I’m still trying to figure out how to feel about the hum of energy I can feel around me. My mind’s no longer used to the frequency, and the whispers seem to reverberate through every corner.
Zeke stares at me. It’s obvious his mind is running through every possibility, turning and twisting and flipping the pieces until they fit together. His eyes narrow, and then his face breaks out into a devilish grin. “Oh, bro. You’ve got it bad for this chick.”
“Yeah. I do.” I hold my brother’s gaze. “But this isn’t done. And I need your help—so zip your trap and sit down. We’re calling Benji.”
Surprisingly, Zeke buttons it. He hops up onto the counter and watches as I dial Benji on FaceTime.
When our middle brother answers, he’s got a toothbrush hanging out his mouth and is wearing sweats and a grungy white tank top, the kind you get in three packs at Walgreens.
His hair is all over the place and the dark circles that ring his eyes are downright alarming.
Shit. That breakup Phoebe mentioned must be hitting him harder than I realized.
“Benji.”
Benji props the phone against something and holds up a finger, signaling for me to wait. He spits his toothpaste into the sink and gargles some water. “What’s up?”
“How fast can you get here?”
Benji knits his perfect brows together. He frowns. Clearly, the thought of driving down from Boston in the middle of the night isn’t something he’s excited about. “Hold up. Why?”
I groan. Adrenaline is still coursing through me, and although everything makes perfect sense in my head, I know I must be skipping the important parts because Benji and Zeke are both still looking at me like I’ve gone nuts.
Breathe, Will. Breathe. Slow the fuck down.
“Uhhh,” I start, scratching my beard. I glance at Zeke to make sure he’s listening, too.
They both need to hear this. “Okay. Here’s the deal.
Remember that librarian Zeke told you I fucked?
Well, I did. I mean, I hadn’t at that point.
But then I did, and—whatever. It doesn’t matter.
The point is, I’m in love with this woman.
Okay? And the library—the same one I’m supposed to be renovating—is the only connection she had left with her mom, who died when she was ten.
She trusted me not to modernize the library beyond recognition, but I fucking did, and did it behind her back, no less, and I broke her goddamn heart.
I tried so hard not to get involved with her for fear of hurting her that what did I do? Ended up hurting her anyway.”
I give a harsh laugh and continue.
“So Lydia hates me. I deserve it. But her mom’s been trying to get my fucking attention for weeks now, and it took me getting shitfaced for her to finally be able to come through at all. When everything started to spin… she seized her chance.”
I pause again, catching my breath. Zeke’s staring at me, and Benji is completely silent on the other end of the line. “My wall’s gone. I let it go.”
“You mean… like, completely?” Benji asks.
“Yeah, man,” Zeke pipes in. “It literally shattered. Wicked cool, honestly.”
“Well, shit,” Benji says. “I never thought I’d see the day.”
“You and me both.”
I scrub a hand down my face. I’m trying so hard not to let the whispers that tug at the edges of the room, seeping in from who knows where, who knows when, distract me. But I need to hurry and get to the point about what we need to do. I want to do it tonight, and I need my brothers on board.
“So, now that I’m back in the always delightful world of psychic apparitions,” I continue, letting the sarcasm creep in because, honestly, being able to feel the angsty dead people floating around you is not as great as the movies make it seem, “I’ve realized I’ve been an absolute fucking idiot.
It may be too late for me to save the library for Lydia—but I can sure as hell keep the connection with her mom alive.
I was just too selfish, too obsessed with that fucking wall and erasing every little bit of Dad, that I didn’t even realize it until now. ”
“Aww,” Zeke coos. “It’s like if Casper the Friendly Ghost had a sexy ending.” He bats his eyelashes at me. “Can I keep you?”
I punch him in the arm. “Laugh all you want. At least I can remember Lydia’s name.”
“Ooh. I’ll bet she can’t remember yours—”
Benji interrupts. “Zeke, shut up. Will, what do you need from us?”
“I need you to get your ass down here, stat.” My voice is gruff as I point a finger at Zeke, letting him know he’s included in this order as well. I look back at Benji. “And bring the spirit board. We’ve got a ghost to summon.”