Chapter Eight
Nikki hated being wasteful.
In the last few weeks of her relationship with Hawk, she hadn’t gotten to her trailer to eat. He had other commitments tonight, so she was at her trailer. The milk was spoiled, and the cheeses were covered in mold. The few cuts of meat she had were rotten. The vegetables were gone as well. There was no bread. She had no choice but to clean out her fridge, which was so wasteful.
Even before she learned how to cook back at her mother’s place, she didn’t throw anything out. Not that there was ever a lot to go bad. It was insane.
She didn’t know how the time had passed so fast. Between work, study, and Hawk, she hadn’t even been back to her trailer for more than a change of clothes. She didn’t know when or if Hawk was picking her up, and she’d gotten into the habit of taking a change of clothes for the morning. Sometimes, he texted her to meet him at the trailer.
She finally had her car back, and it made the journey to and from work, the trailer, or the motel room a lot easier. Nikki couldn’t believe they kept getting the same motel room. The place was always busy.
Hawk’s rules did seem a little absurd, but she didn’t mind following them, especially if they made him more comfortable. It wasn’t like she had any great connection to the club. Far from it, she got pissed off constantly taking Diana there.
Speaking of Diana, she hadn’t seen her friend in weeks. Their friendship was well and truly over.
She finished gathering up her trash and left the trailer. It was still light outside. No one said hello to her, which wasn’t unusual. She didn’t make many friends. On her way back to her trailer, she stopped.
It was like she had thought her old friend out of thin air. Diana was standing by her trailer.
Dusting her hands off, she walked closer. “What are you doing here?”
She had not seen her since Hawk had told her one of the women at the club had taken care of her. There were no telltale bruises on her face. Had it already been that long?
“What are you doing here?”
“I don’t want to be here, all right? Here, here is your fucking money,”
Diana said, shoving an envelope in her direction.
Nikki had no choice but to take it. She frowned at the envelope and then looked up at her friend. She didn’t know why, but she glanced down, opening it up, and saw several notes of cash.
“What is all of this?”
“All the bail money you helped me out with. I guess there was always a limit to being my friend, huh?”
“I have no idea what this is,”
Nikki said. “What are you doing?”
“Isn’t that what you want your boyfriend to do? To make me pay up for all the times you claimed to be my best friend. Because of you, I got kicked out of the club.”
“This is my fault?”
Nikki asked.
“If you hadn’t gone and told or complained, none of this would have been a problem.”
Nikki’s hands clenched into fists. “I didn’t complain. You went and told someone I didn’t know my private business. I have done nothing but be a friend to you, and what did I get? Oh, that’s right, you didn’t even bother to tell me that someone was asking questions about me. You’re selfish and self-centered. You always have been. Do you have any idea what you were known as at the club?”
Nikki asked. “Diana the Desperate. No one was going to touch you because they already knew you were going to take any man you could get your hands on.”
Diana laughed.
Nikki knew her words had caused her old friend pain.
Her own mother had been a piece of work, well, Diana’s father had been … at times, just as cruel. First, Diana was not his legitimate child. She was the result of a mistress. He only ever came around to Diana when he wanted his mistress. Diana was just the result of keeping another woman. The moment the mistress was given up, Diana was simply thrown money.
Whatever she wanted, she could have, as he was rich. The only thing he couldn’t give her was his name, and well, the love she craved.
Diana always pretended she didn’t need a man, she didn’t need her father, but Nikki knew differently. She had watched her friend look at other families with longing.
Nikki didn’t care about a father or a mother. She knew some families were lucky to have it all, while others got the raw end of the stick. That was life and there was nothing they could do about it.
“Yeah, well, at least I am not delusional. Hawk wants you now, but I know you are never seen at the club. He doesn’t want you there. He wants to fuck you and have his fun with you, but like a lot of women before you, once he is done with you, there won’t be another chance.”
Diana looked her up and down. “I don’t even know what he sees in you.”
Then she smiled. “Unless he just plans to remove every little detail that makes you that virginal tight ass you’ve always been.” Diana laughed. “That is probably it. I bet he wasted no time in taking that precious virginity you kept to yourself.”
“Go away,”
Nikki said. She’d heard enough.
“Do you think that is going to be enough to keep him, is that it? Do you think you have what it takes to win Hawk?”
This time, she threw back her head and the laughter was verging on hysterical. “You’re fucking hopeless, Nikki. He’s having his fun, and when he’s done and you’re nothing more than a whore like the rest of us, he’ll move on. There is no winning Hawk. There never was.”
And with that, Diana spun on her heel and left.
Nikki didn’t know what to do. She had no idea what to think or feel. There was no way she was going to keep Hawk, she knew that. Was he using her? Had the draw been her virginity?
Shaking her head, she quickly made her way back inside the trailer, closing the door, and then moving toward the sink. She felt like she had to do something. Wringing out a cloth, she began to wipe down the kitchen counters. There had been a thin layer of dust before Diana’s visit but she’d taken care of most of it. Her trailer had seen a lot less love over the last few weeks.
What the hell was wrong with her? Diana was just messing with her. She was angry about being kicked out of the club and was taking it out on her. But—and this was a big but—she couldn’t help wondering exactly how much of it was true.
****
Business had gone swimmingly. The guns had been transported and sold. The cash was already secured, and the club had stopped at a rundown motel and had set a few trash cans on fire for light and warmth. The beer was flowing, and Hawk’s mind was not on the run he’d just successfully accomplished, but on a certain brunette waiting for him back home.
A couple of the guys had found a few women for the night and were back in the rooms, testing them out.
He loved when business went well, especially when it came to the gun runs. They were high-risk, almost as high-risk as the drugs they moved from the port to some of the cities and warehouses. Again, it was just business. Lucrative. This was what his father had set up before he passed away. It was a deal that meant zero bloodshed.
There were many reasons why they were feared. His father had often told him the key to survival was to always be one step ahead of the game. It was why he always arrived on the job early, always picked the location, and before entering any potential problem, he had it checked out. The guys were not interested in serving jail time.
He wasn’t going to let any of them go to prison, or head back there. Some of the guys had done their time. It was par for the course at the club. He’d served a short time when he was in his early twenties. “Possession with intent to distribute”
was what they had gotten him with at the time.
He’d been collecting the drugs that had been distributed across the towns where they were stationed. Nearly eighteen years ago, several women ended up dead, overdosed on product, and his dad hadn’t been too happy about that. At first, he thought it was down to the supplier who’d simply given them a dodgy batch. That hadn’t been the case. Someone else had been cooking the drugs in town, distributing them with the hope of the Devil’s Beasts MC taking the fall.
During their investigation, he got caught, didn’t talk, and got sentenced. Jail was no fun, but he got through. The club had contacts on the inside, and while he was there, he was able to help with business as well.
After he went down, his father got out of dealing with drugs. Now they simply transported it and the town’s streets were clean. It was in his own way, that his father had told him he loved him. He felt responsible for getting his son sent away.
Hawk didn’t mind. Sure, he was pissed about getting caught, but it was just another way to prove to the club that he had their backs. When he got out, the club gave him a big celebration, his father taught him how to run the club, the businesses they owned, and the changes they made.
His father never outright told him he loved him, but he didn’t need to. Actions spoke louder than words. Besides, they didn’t need all of that sharing feelings shit.
“A good run today, Boss,”
Dan said, coming to sit with him.
They clinked their beer bottles together, and took long sips.
“It was.”
They were sitting in silence, and Hawk watched as Needle grabbed one of the women and started to undress her. The woman laughed and was more than happy to have men’s eyes on her.
His thoughts drifted to Nikki. She wouldn’t want any man’s eyes on her but his. Hawk wouldn’t want anyone to even look at her. That woman belonged to him, all him.
Dan reached into his jacket and pulled out a folded-up piece of paper. “Found this on one of the bitches back at the clubhouse.”
Hawk frowned. He didn’t like conducting personal business on the road, Dan knew that. He went to place it into his pocket.
“You’ll want to read it, Boss,” Dan said.
He rarely called him Hawk, Prez, or even President. It was mostly Boss.
Unfolding the piece of paper, he saw it was a message:
Be careful who you fuck. We’re watching!
“Is this some kind of joke?”
Hawk asked.
Dan shook his head. “It was attached to Nikki’s car window.”
Now Hawk tensed up. “What?”
“Look, I know you don’t want the club to know, and I get it. It’s your business, but you did ask us to keep an eye on her, and well, Darlene saw this attached to her window and wanted to give it to me. She didn’t want Nikki seeing it or freaking out.”
He’d not seen Nikki for nearly five days. Before he left, he did warn her it would be a few days before he returned. She was already under strict instructions not to go to the club, and if there was anything she needed, she was to call him.
He didn’t like this. This was a threat against his woman.
“Did she see who put this there?”
Hawk asked.
“No, but I figured you would want to see it. It could just be some joker or something.”
“But Darlene came to you?”
“I went to see her. I do from time to time. It’s … fun. She likes Nikki. Thinks she’s a good woman.”
“I don’t need a good word from Darlene or anyone else, you got that?”
“Hawk, I’m just giving you the details. Darlene couldn’t get ahold of you. This is yours to do with as you wish.”
With that, Dan got to his feet and left.
Now, Hawk was pissed. He’d been careful in his pursuit of Nikki.
Opening the letter, the words danced across the paper. It wasn’t even handwritten, but typed up on a computer and printed off. He got to his feet and dropped it into the fire. Finishing his beer, he made his way back to his room, but this was not where he wanted to be. He would rather be balls-deep inside Nikki, teaching her how to take his dick, and watching her love every second of it.
Pulling out his cell phone, he brought up Nikki’s number. He never called her on club runs, but this was a long one, and he’d grown tired of being away from her. He was turning into a fucking pussy, he knew that all too well. Clicking on her name, he waited.
It took her several seconds to answer, and when she finally did, it was a relief to hear her voice.
“Hawk?”
“Hey, Beautiful, it’s me. How are you?”
He didn’t even need to close his eyes, he could imagine her smile, that sweet lilt to her head she sometimes gave when she was trying to be serious.
“Uh, I’m good. You?”
Now, he frowned. She sounded … pissed off, and he didn’t like that.
“Is everything okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine.”
He didn’t need to be in the same room as her to know something was very wrong with the way she sounded, and he just got this sixth sense.
“What’s going on?”
Hawk asked.
“It’s nothing.”
“I know that’s not true. Tell me.”
There was silence, but she hadn’t hung up, and he was not going anywhere until she told him.
“Look, Babe, you either tell me now, or I’m coming over there, and I won’t give a fuck what time it is. I’ll spank that ass to give me what I want.”
He had other ideas. Sure, he wanted to know what was bothering her, but he also wanted to fuck her.
This was not good. He was a grown man, forty years old. Nikki was twenty-two. He was eighteen years her senior. Fuck, she was the same age he was when he got arrested and thrown in jail.
Silence met his threat, but he was more than willing to have his men talking to know what the fuck was going on with her.
“It’s Diana. She stopped by and gave me the money she owed me for the times I bailed her out. That’s all, and she just said some stuff.”
Diana. He should have known. That bitch can’t keep anything to herself. Before he left, he’d paid the little desperate slut a visit, and told her she was to give back all the money she had taken from Nikki.
“What stuff did she say?”
Hawk asked. He was losing his patience. If she didn’t start talking, he was going to hang up, call Melanie, and tell her to deal with her.
“Just about you and me.”
“Us?”
Hawk asked.
“Yeah, she told me you were using me, that you don’t really want me, and you’re only interested in my virginity. It wasn’t … don’t worry about it.”
He rubbed his temples.
He didn’t give a shit about her virginity. Well, that was wrong. He enjoyed taking her virginity, and he liked being the only man she had ever known. Now, he was enjoying teaching her all the stuff she needed to be his, completely.
“I don’t want you to listen to a word that bitch says, got it?”
“Sure.”
But he had his doubts.
“Nikki, I wanted you because you’re not interested in any of the other club guys. You don’t want to be near them, do you, being shared?”
“Hell, no.”
“But I also like you. I like hanging out with you. I like being with you, and you enjoy being with me as well, don’t you?” he asked.
“Yeah, yeah, I do.”
“So, don’t listen to what other jealous fucks have to say. Diana got her ass kicked out of the club, and she is taking it out on you rather than sucking up the responsibility herself. Don’t listen to her. She’s a troublemaker.”
“You’re not going to … hurt her?”
“No, I’m not.”
But he had no problem making sure someone else did. He didn’t want her thinking about Diana or worrying about her.
“Where are you?”
he asked, changing the conversation.
“In bed. It’s kind of cold out.”
“Yeah, it is.”
He didn’t feel the cold. “What are you wearing?”
She gave a little giggle that wasn’t cute but feminine, and made him think of doing dirty things to her.
“Hawk?”
“Tell me.”
“I’m in a ratty old t-shirt and a pair of pants, why? What are you wearing?”
“Too many clothes, but take those panties off.”
There was silence and he heard her sigh, then he heard her move.
“They’re gone.”
“Now, touch that pretty pussy.”
“Hawk?”
“Babe, if I was there, you know I’d have my fingers or my tongue knuckle-deep inside you. Give a guy a break. Come on. Help me out.”
He had a feeling she rolled her eyes at him, but he didn’t care. He wanted her to touch that pretty pussy. Hawk heard her draw a breath and he knew exactly when she touched her pussy.
“You’re sensitive,” he said.
“I wish you were here.”
“I’m going to be there. Trust me. Tomorrow night, you better be at the motel room.”
“You could come here,” she said.
“Motel room. Now, stroke your fingers over your clit. Are you nice and wet?”
Another throaty moan along with a little whimper. “Yes.”
“Good, dip your fingers into your cunt. Let them get nice and soaked.”
He waited, listening to her gasp. “Now, bring it back up and touch your clit, slide it back and forth, and tomorrow night, know that I’m going to have my tongue on that pussy, but do you know what else I think it’s time for?”
“What?”
she asked, sounding close to orgasm.
His cock was so hard, it was verging on painful in his jeans, and they were not even that fucking tight. He wanted to be inside her so badly. He wanted to have her sweet cunt juice on his fingers, his chin, and breathe in the whole scent of her.
“It’s time for those lips to suck my cock. I want to watch you take all of me.”
She let out a moan.
“Hawk?”
“That’s right, come for me, Baby.”
And he heard her do so over the phone.