CHAPTER TWENTY
NOLA
The text came through while Terrence was in the shower.
Mani wasn’t snooping.
That mattered to her, even if it wouldn’t matter to anybody else once the argument started.
She had gone home after three days at Nola’s because Terrence kept saying they needed to talk without an audience. Mani agreed.
They talked.
He apologized for embarrassing her at dinner.
He said he would stop commenting on every meal.
She said she would be more honest when she was stress eating instead of hiding wrappers in the outside trash because she didn’t want a conversation.
It wasn’t perfect.
But it felt like something.
Then his phone lit up on the bathroom counter while Mani was brushing her teeth.
JANELLE:
SHE STILL MAD ABOUT DINNER?
Mani stared at the preview.
Water ran behind the shower curtain.
Her first thought was stupidly practical.
How does Janelle know about dinner?
Then another message came.
YOU CAN’T MAKE SOMEBODY WANT BETTER FOR THEMSELVES.
Mani stopped brushing.
Foam gathered at the corner of her mouth.
She rinsed, put the toothbrush down, and waited.
Terrence came out in a towel, saw her face, and knew immediately.
“What?”
Mani pointed at the phone.
He looked.
His shoulders dropped.
That was worse than confusion.
“Who is Janelle?”
“A coworker.”
“I know that. Who is she to you?”
“Nobody.”
“Then why she know I’m mad about dinner?”
Terrence sat on the closed toilet lid.
“We talk sometimes.”
“About me.”
“About work. Life. Shit.”
“About me.”
He rubbed his face.
“Sometimes.”
Mani laughed once.
It came out ugly.
“What does she know?”
“Mani—”
“No. What does she know?”
Terrence stood. “It’s not like that.”
“I didn’t ask if you fucked her.”
“I never touched that woman.”
“Congratulations. What does she know?”
He looked away.
Mani’s stomach turned.
“Does she know I gained weight?”
Silence.
“Does she know we ain’t been having sex like before?”
Terrence’s face tightened.
“I was venting.”
“Does she know about my sister asking for money?”
“Mani.”
“Does she know I been eating at night when I’m stressed?”
“I needed somebody to talk to.”
Mani stepped back like he had reached for her.
“You had me.”
“Every time I tried to talk, you got defensive.”
“Because you were talking at my body!”
“I was worried about you.”
“Then why does she know my business?”
Terrence’s voice rose. “Because she listened!”
Silence.
There it was.
The real thing.
Not sex.
Not weight.
He had given another woman the part of him Mani kept asking for.
His openness.
His frustration.
His fear.
His tenderness, maybe.
Everything he no longer brought home clean.
Mani’s eyes burned.
She hated crying when she was angry because people mistook tears for surrender.
“Does she know about my teeth?”
Terrence went still.
Mani had told him about that on their second anniversary.
Not the jokes. Not the general “I hate my gap” version.
The real memory.
Being twelve and refusing school pictures because boys in her class called it a parking space. Her aunt offering to pay for braces and saying, “You’d be so pretty if we fixed that.”
Terrence had held her face and said nobody needed to fix anything.
Now his silence told her he had handed that story to Janelle too.
Mani covered her mouth.
Not because of the gap this time.
Because something in her wanted to come apart.
Terrence stood.
“I didn’t tell her to be mean.”
“You told her.”
“I was explaining why you—”
“Why I what?”
He stopped.
“Why I been different? Why I don’t smile? Why I don’t want you touching me sometimes? You explained me to another woman?”
“I was trying to understand.”
“Then you should’ve asked me.”
“I did!”
“No. You corrected me. You monitored me. You told her about me. You did everything except sit down and listen when I said I was miserable.”
Terrence looked wrecked.
That made it harder.
Because he did love her.
She could see it.
And love had still not stopped him from hurting her.
“I never cheated on you,” he said.
Mani closed her eyes.
“You keep saying that like it saves you.”
She packed a bag.
Terrence followed her from room to room, trying to talk.
She told him she was going to Nola’s.
He asked if they could finish the conversation tomorrow.
Mani said maybe.
Not because she planned to come back.
Because she wasn’t ready to decide forever while her hands were shaking.
Nola opened the door before Mani knocked.
One look at her face and all the jokes disappeared.
“What happened?”
Mani walked in.
Kai was on the couch.
Dez sat in the armchair with a laptop open, both men clearly working on Dre.
Mani stopped.
“I didn’t know they were here.”
“They can leave,” Nola said immediately.
Kai was already standing.
“We can work at the office.”
“No,” Mani said. “I’m not trying to clear the house. I just...”
Her voice broke.
Nola took the overnight bag from her hand.
Dez closed the laptop without looking like he wanted details.
Kai gathered his keys.
“Call if you need anything.”
Nola nodded.
Dez got up.
As he passed Mani, he stopped.
“You good?”
Stupid question.
His face acknowledged that before she had to.
“Sorry. That was dumb.”
Mani let out a tiny laugh.
Her hand rose over her mouth.
Dez’s eyes went to it.
Then back to her face.
He didn’t say anything.
“We leaving,” he said instead. “But if you need food or anything, text Nola and she’ll make Kai pay for it.”
Kai looked at him. “Why me?”
“You got the most money.”
Mani laughed again.
Hand still there.
Dez smiled at her.
Not the gap.
Her.
Then he left with Kai.
After the door closed, Nola turned to Mani.
“Tell me.”
Mani lowered her hand.
“He didn’t fuck her.”
Nola’s face changed.
“But?”
Mani sat down.
“She knows everything.”
And that was when she started crying.