Chapter 26
CHAPTER
TWENTY-SIX
When Ada’s breathing finally evens out, an exhausted sleep claiming her, my turn to fall apart arrives.
It’s easier to be strong when she needs me, but now that I’m alone with my thoughts I can’t stay still.
I slip out of her bed gingerly so as to not disturb her rest, and when I lose the warmth and softness of her form against mine, my hands begin to tremble.
My mind races as the reality of my situation fully sets in.
I’m in the human realm, and likely stuck here forever.
I say likely, because things have been a blur of activity and soothing Ada so I haven’t tested my theory. I’m afraid to try, but it has to be done to understand how dire my situation is.
Henry gives a lazy tail thump as I step out of Ada’s bedroom into the living room, his body trained toward the front door from his spot on his fluffy bed.
I go over and bend down next to him, giving his greying muzzle a soft pat and a few scratches behind his ears that make his leg kick out.
“Good boy,” I murmur. “If I’m able to leave, you’ll watch her while I’m gone, won’t you? ”
Henry thumps his tail again, soulful dark eyes staring into my mask as if to say “uh, no shit, that’s my job.”
I chuckle, the sound shaking loose a fraction of the tightness in my chest and throat.
Alright, better get this over with.
Sighing, I give Henry another pat and rise, unable to keep from peeking back into Ada’s bedroom to make sure she’s still resting. Her gentle snoring lets me know she’s still asleep, and my chest squeezes as I watch her for a long moment.
Even with her face puffy from tears and a slight furrow still on her brow, she’s the loveliest being I’ve ever encountered. It’s difficult to pull myself away again, the ache inside me begging me to go back to her bed and hold her. To never let her go.
In her dreams, I was her captor, holding her against her will so I could enact all her darkest visions, but this urge to hold Ada tight and never let her out of my sight is different.
It’s a bone-deep yearning to be in her presence.
A terror that if I’m not, something horrible will happen to her again.
I still don’t even know if she wants me here now that the imminent danger is gone. I offered to stay and be by her side for as long as she wanted me, and she thanked me, but didn’t indicate any desire for that.
Why would she? I served my purpose. Protected her when she needed me. Satisfied her curiosity about what it’d be like to be fucked by her nightmare. Now that reality is crashing back in on her again, why would she want any reminder of what she’s been through?
I wouldn’t blame her at all for wanting me to leave.
Which is why I need to stop stalling and find out if that means I’ll go back home when she turns me away, or if I’ll need to figure out how the fuck to exist in this human realm on my own.
Stepping out into the biting air of the late afternoon, the sun dipping below the horizon casting a golden glow on everything it can reach, I attempt to still my mind.
My eyes shut and I slow my breathing, hesitantly reaching inside me for the tether that connects me to dreaming.
It takes what feels like ages before I locate it, and when I do, another eternity for me to focus enough on it to attempt to tug myself across realms of existence.
Every molecule of my body fights it, my skin feeling like it’s being torn apart violently as I try to undo the weave of this solid, far too physical form. I grit my teeth against the pain, blood filling my mouth as my fangs cut into my lip, but I push harder.
The agony is blinding, but I can feel the dream realm just out of reach. If I tried a little more…
A wretched cry bursts from my lungs as I collapse to my knees in the snow from the pain. Fuck, it’s like there’s an anchor weighing me down, preventing me from making that final step.
Ada.
The moment I think of her, I lose my grip on the tether and am slammed back into my corporeal form. My breath punches out of my lungs and I sputter and gasp, eyes opening again to take in the vivid beauty of the mortal world I’m officially stuck in.
Well…shit.
A dark laugh bubbles out of me as my body sags, flopping over onto my back in the snow and staring up at the cloudless sky.
Cold seeps into my limbs, moisture soaking into my clothing as the snow melts on contact with my body heat.
My heart hammers in my chest, my stomach clenches with some unknown discomfort, and my lungs burn from the exertion of attempting to leave and the frigid air.
How is it possible to feel so much? It’s absurd. It’s a miracle that mortals can survive this constant barrage of sensation, let alone have the capacity for anything else.
A creak from the house has me sitting up with a jolt. Turning toward the sound, I find Ada standing on the porch, barefoot and wrapped in one of her fuzzy robes as she peers out at me.
“Are you okay?” she calls out, face scrunching in concern. “Did you fall or something? I heard a shout and I…”
Fuck, I woke her up. Probably scared the shit out of her again, making her think she was in danger.
“I’m fine.” My voice is a rough croak, so I clear my throat and try again. “Everything’s fine.”
It’s a lie, but I’m not about to dump my worries onto this traumatized, shivering woman.
“It’s too cold out here, you’re going to freeze like that,” I call to her as I stand up, attempting to brush the snow off of me but only managing to spread it around more.
“So are you.” Ada frowns at me. “Come back inside before you freeze to death.”
I cock my head at her. “That’s something that happens?”
She gives me a befuddled look. “Uh, yeah? If you stay out in the cold long enough, it’s possible.”
Shit, another thing to worry about. Not for myself, but for her. What if she gets lost out in the woods and can’t find her way home? There’s no one else out here for miles now that her human embodiment of trash neighbor is gone.
I swallow down my surge of panic and nod. When I get to the door, Ada stops me with a hand on my chest, and suddenly every sensation in my body narrows to that one point of contact.
“Take your shoes and jacket off when you get inside so you don’t track snow everywhere.”
It takes a moment for me to process her words, too caught up in her nearness and her delicate fingers fiery points on my chilled, bare chest. I shrug my jacket off and set it on a hook by the front door, then bend to undo the laces of my boots.
“Jesus, why don’t you have a shirt on under there?”
Her question makes me laugh. I look at my torso pointedly and then back at her. “Because you didn’t give me one.”
“Oh.” Ada’s cheeks flood with color, and my cock twitches remembering how the same thing happened when I had her pinned against the tree in the forest as she screamed my name.
Stop it. She doesn’t want that. You don’t even know if she wants you here.
I focus on taking off my boots, and her frown deepens.
“No socks? God, sleepy Ada really isn’t good at providing adequate attire.”
I wiggle my toes, which tingle as blood flows and they begin to thaw in the warmth of the cabin. “To be fair, I didn’t need it in your dreams.”
It must be the wrong thing to say, because she pales.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, her voice wavering like she’s on the verge of crying again.
Any worries I had about my predicament vanish like they always seem to do when Ada is distressed.
I can worry about being stuck here, where I’m going to live, if I’ll ever get to see my friends or go home again, how to exist in the body that is a constant barrage of stimulation, and everything else later.
When Ada’s eyes aren’t welling with tears.
“Hey, shh, no, it’s fine, Princess.” I reach out to pull her into my arms on instinct and against all odds, she doesn’t flinch away. Gods, I can’t get over how amazing she feels pressed against me. So fucking soft and perfect.
I only have a moment to savor the embrace before she shivers, and I curse my stupidity for pressing my freezing body against hers. “Let’s get you back into bed where it’s warm.”
She doesn’t protest, letting me guide her to the bedroom. Exhaustion is still clear on her face, and she lets out a shuddering exhale when she’s tucked back in her sleeping pod.
When I turn to leave the bedroom and let her rest, her brows knit together.
“Where are you going?”
I frown. “I was going to go sit by the fire and try to dry off and warm up.”
“Oh. Okay.” For some strange reason, the tension on her face releases. “You’re not leaving?”
My stomach lurches at an echo of the pain I felt earlier when I tried to go home.
“Do you want me to leave?” I ask, trying not to reveal with my tone that I have nowhere else to go.
I refuse to guilt her into letting me stay.
Ada’s home has been her sanctuary against all her fears up until recently.
I’ve already messed things up enough with my fumbling attempts to bring her cheer that I won’t strip away more of her safe haven from her.
I suppose Tom’s cabin is empty now. I could go stay there. I’d have to burn his belongings to rid the place of his vile energy, but at least it’s shelter.
Ada stops my frantic planning with a shake of her head. “No.”
That one word has the same effect as her wrapping her arms around me, warmth seeping into all the parts of me that have gone cold and scared at my new reality.
I shouldn’t read too much into it. She probably only wants me here until she’s certain Tom won’t come back.
But at least I can stay for now, and that’s enough.
“Alright,” I croak.
She surveys me for a long moment, her blinks growing slower as exhaustion makes it harder for her to stay awake. “You should take the rest of your clothes off,” she murmurs.
My cock swells at the idea of her wanting me naked, but surely she doesn’t want me that way again. She’s sore and tired.
“What?”
“They’re wet. You’ll get warmer faster if you take them off.” Ada yawns.
It sounds counterintuitive to be taking off my pants, but I nod and start to strip. I almost miss the way her cheeks flush as she watches me bare my body, because I’m focused on yelling at my cock to not get harder. And failing spectacularly.
“God, you’re big,” she says with a soft gasp.
“I know,” I say apologetically, placing my hands in front of my stiffening length to hide it from her view and stop scaring her.
“Truly unreal,” she mumbles, words slurring together. “This is all probably a dream and you’ll be gone when I wake up…”
I shake my head, voice rueful when I speak. “I wish for your sake it were, but unfortunately I’m real. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
She nods, eyes closing like the thought helps her relax. Her breathing evens as sleep drags her under.
I grab a blanket and place it over her, worried that her sleeping pod isn’t warm enough. Wishing I could climb in bed with her, but knowing I shouldn’t. She lets out a soft sigh as I allow myself to stroke a hand down her blanketed arm.
“I’ll be here for good, and I’m scared,” I confess, voice barely audible.
When she doesn’t react to the words, I continue, knowing she can’t hear them but needing to let them out. “I don’t know how to do this. How to be this. I know I shouldn’t ask for your help.” My throat tightens as I pull away. “But please, let me stay a little longer.”