Chapter 6
“Alot of ways to love you… teach me through your eyes…”
A few weeks later…
Harbor
I was accustomed to a certain lifestyle after being with Frequency going on almost two years now.
And I refused to go back to anything under that.
Since I was in the real estate business, it wasn’t difficult to find a place to stay.
After news broke of everything with Frequency, his estate was always surrounded with reporters trying to out scoop the next.
It was draining trying to live everyday life, taking the twins to doctor’s appointments and dodging the paparazzi.
Suddenly, I knew exactly what celebrities felt like, and it was suffocating.
The apartment I ended up leasing for myself took the entire seventh floor, and it was just enough room for me and the twins.
At first, I was hesitant about moving out.
but Frequency and his confusion were enough to push me right out the door.
I no longer felt like a priority. I was questioning my position in his life, and it was unsettling.
Everything happened so abruptly that it disrupted everything.
The twins were finally on a schedule at home, and now that I had them by myself, they were tag teaming me, and none of us were getting any sleep.
I still had maternity time for work, and Chevy was keeping busy along with a new girl that she hired, but my days were running together, and I felt like I was losing my mind.
I wanted to get back to work, but I wasn’t so sure that I wanted to go back into that office setting.
Selling houses was great, but the market was demanding, and I was focused on other things.
Dance for one. I wanted to get back to me.
It was the only thing that gave me complete peace without asking for anything in return.
Celine had been checking on me every day, five times or more.
I was lying to her about keeping it together because I didn’t want to feel like a failure.
Ivy was upset about the separation, and now she wasn’t even excited about the party being planned for her.
I couldn’t let her down. Everything was set for her event, and the house was about to be flooded with all kinds of people.
Frequency wasn’t even emotionally equipped to deal with people like that.
He hated even being around anyone too long; that much I was sure of.
The last thing I wanted to do was be one of those people that let Ivy down.
There was a light tap at the door, pulling me from my focus on wrapping Ivy’s gifts inside the vast living room.
I stuffed the last one inside a big party bag.
Dragging myself to my feet, I took a few steps toward the foyer and checked the peephole before opening the door.
D stood on the other side. He had been kind enough to stick with me since leaving the estate, and I was grateful for it.
At this point, I don’t think I could get rid of him if I tried.
“They just called from the front desk. Boss is on his way up,” he informed me, and my heart betrayed me by thudding in my chest excitedly.
I didn’t want to react to hearing that Frequency was in the building, but not long ago, I got this surge of energy that told me something was amiss somewhere.
I nodded and closed the door behind him.
Pausing in the mirror in the hallway, I ran my fingers through my wild hair.
I looked like I had been caught up in a storm.
My face was bare and hair was wild, although pulled back into a messy bun on top.
I even wore a pair of reading glasses on top of my head.
The pajama pants and ruffled T-shirt were a clear sign that I had been lazy all damn day today, along with the spit-up that stained me.
I even smelled like baby puke. Shit was real around here.
I bolted up the steps to my bedroom and stripped out of my clothes.
I didn’t even have a damn bra on. It was easier to nurse throughout the day without one.
Ripping through the clothes in my drawers, I came across a pair of Nike stretch pants and a matching black tank top.
Standing in the full-length mirror, I did a once-over of my reflection.
Taking the ponytail out, I ran my fingers through my hair and redid the bun to make it more presentable.
“Harbor!” Ivy’s voice called out to me from below.
“Coming!” I retorted, rushing to the door.
I caught my breath before starting down the steps.
When I appeared at the top, I could look over the railing into the lavish living room setup.
Ivy traipsed around the living room in her dance uniform, checking out the knickknacks and artwork that accented the apartment.
Her hand swiped an item here and there, but she wasn’t smiling.
I could tell from where I stood that she was in one of her melancholy moods, despite her birthday being so close.
Frequency stood at the bottom of the steps, inhaling deeply as his expression softened.
He held our son in his arms, and I could see Maze’s little hands reaching up for his daddy, warming my heart and frazzling my spirit at the same time.
I took the steps slowly, holding the railing.
I felt possession the minute that I saw them together.
This world had become all that I knew. I was so deeply rooted in this that I was bearing my own fruit and everything; my children were proof of that.
His darkened eyes either couldn’t or wouldn’t pull away from me.
Analyzing me, he trying to check my temp.
This wasn’t the first time that he had stopped by, and we were cordial, but I was indifferent.
“What are you doing here? Don’t you have a shopping spree to be on?” I greeted Ivy with open arms, stepping right past Frequency.
She stepped into my embrace and held on to me. I could feel the love through her hug.
“Mmm, how was class?” I questioned, looking her up and down and pinching her cheek gently.
She hated it, but I couldn’t help it because she still had that adorable baby fat in her cheeks, and I wasn’t so sure how long that was going to be there since she was growing up so fast.
“Good. You about ready to show me some new moves?” Her dark eyes playfully searching mine.
“Umm, not quite. These two got my hands full these days.” I pointed out her brother and sister. “And the only thing you should be worried about right now is this birthday party.”
Luckily, I had shoved her gifts into the big birthday bag I got, so she wasn’t able to see anything. Misa stirred in the crib, and Ivy went right over to check on her.
“I am betting she is either hungry or wet.” Ivy knelt to scoop her into her arms. “I’ll go check for a bottle.”
She fled the room, leaving thick tension between me and Free. I barely glanced at him, clearing my throat. I went for the gifts in the bag so that I could tuck them into a nearby closet. Free walked around to the couch and settled with our son on the sofa.
“What’s good, son? Yo’ mama still on that bullshit, huh?” he asked teasingly.
Maze cooed in response, and it was the most-adorable thing as he gave his father a half smile. I stood at his side, and he reached for my hand.
“I miss you.” His tone was soft, and his thumb gently caressed the top of my hand.
A surge of heat spread through me like wildfire, right through my chest. He gave my arm a gentle tug and pulled me down into the sofa beside him. Plopping into the cushions, our arms and legs touched I was sitting so close. Maze’s little face wrinkled up as he yawned.
“How are things at the house?” I queried, fidgeting with my hands.
“Terrible,” he answered. “Ivy and Celine keep an attitude with a nigga. Celine told me to fix this. That’s what I’m trying to do.”
“It’s not that simple.” I reached for Maze’s little hand, and he gripped it in his fingers tightly.
Studying his face, you couldn’t tell me that God and love weren’t real. This was as cosmic as it got.
“Have you spoken to Ivana?” I queried, locking eyes with this man that I had grown to love beyond the capacity that I thought my heart could.
He had stolen a piece of it, and even now, not being on the same page, it was still very present. Another man would never be able to claim that part of me.
“Me and Ledge been working on some shit. I haven’t had the time to really talk to her about anything.
Been spending most of my time in my own head.
Shit for the party started arriving. Celine thought since you planned everything you could bring the twins out to oversee shit.
” Hopefully, his enchanting orbs burned into mine.
“I guess it makes sense,” I mumbled. “I’ll get the kids dressed and head over.”
“I can stick around, drive y’all over,” he suggested, turning Maze in his arms and holding him out in front of himself so that he could get a good look at his face.
Watching him in daddy mode was amazing. I didn’t know what he was like with Ivy, but he was very attentive and in tune to our children’s needs.
“I’ll go get some things together and meet you downstairs. Did you get car seats?” I questioned.
“I did, two brand-new ones already locked in my whip,” he answered, bouncing his leg with Maze.
“OK, be right back.”