Chapter 17
seventeen
My Diamond
Jim
David was riled up to no end.
He made his feelings known that he didn’t like that Charlie was the cause of this happening to me, that his mouth was dangerous, and that I refused to acknowledge it.
Instead, I was keeping him around when he should be “far, far away”.
I had to talk him off the ledge, which was never fun.
Getting him to calm down when his emotions were high and his thoughts were loud was never easy, whether it was because of something exciting or– like this. His Italian genes were heavy.
Even though I told him Charlie shouldn’t be to blame, even though he ran his mouth off, he was just coming to our defense, which David would have done too.
He didn’t like that I pointed him out because he knew I was right.
I could tell he was having a hard time letting it go, even after changing topics to talk about my recovery, making the air in my room uncomfortable.
Especially when Charlie came back in to check on me. At that point, David excused himself, saying he’d be back to check on me later this week. Maybe bring some beers, if I was allowed to drink.
But with David leaving, it left Charlie and me alone again.
We were interrupted before when we were in the heat of the moment.
It excited me. I haven’t felt like this about anyone.
Sure, I’ve been attracted to men, and have had sex occasionally with men, but all that was without real feelings.
But this also scared me. I never thought I would ever be in this position.
And I had been okay with that. I was safer like that.
I still had to hide myself, blend in, but it was easier to hide and blend by yourself than with another person.
That tended to draw attention.
But now Charlie just stood there awkwardly by the door, like he didn’t know if he was welcome to come any closer after David’s spectacle.
“Come here, Honey,” as I reached out my hand.
He crept my way, like a hesitant animal not knowing if the human was safe. “You called me that at the hospital.” He was cutely gnawing the side of his mouth as he was getting on the bed, gingerly so as not to bounce me.
“Yeah. I was just trying to get your attention, and it slipped out. But it worked so,” I shrugged. “Plus, I like it for you, it fits.”
Charlie pinched his face in with a scrunched nose, brows dropping. “Why? You barely know me to give me an endearment.”
“I know enough. Plus, when I kiss you, you are always sweet like honey,” I lightly touched his lips with the tips of my fingers. “I have been waiting for David to leave so I could get another taste. I’m already so addicted.”
I pulled him forward and kissed him full on. He came to me without resistance, but it didn’t feel right this time. Something was off. So, I pulled back to look at him, but he was looking down at the bed.
“Charlie, what’s wrong, Honey?” I touched his face to look at me. His eyes were skittish. “Talk to me, please. You are safe here.” I placed my forehead on his, touching our noses together and wiggling mine, which made him crack a small smile that raised his cheek muscles.
“This is, umm…,” pausing. He was searching my eyes, maybe for a pre-reaction to what he was about to tell me. He exhaled a sweet breath and revealed what I already assumed. “I had never kissed anyone before Monday,” then went back to biting his bottom lip.
“Stop that,” I reach up to pull his lip out, “if anyone is going to bite your lip, it’s going to be me.
” I gave him a teasing smirk and some heat in my eyes.
“And there is nothing to be worried about. I’m not going to pounce on you or force you to do anything you don’t want, especially with the condition I am currently in.
So, you can quiet your mind and stop the spiral that is spinning.
This may be happening fast, but you have always been in control of the speed. ”
Closing my eyes, I leaned in and gave him another sweet kiss, puckering my lips into light pillows as comfort.
We laid there, facing each other, breathing each other in, for the longest time.
I think I needed it to help recenter myself, just as much as Charlie needed it to calm his internal worries.
Finally, my stomach gurgled, breaking the tranquil moment.
“Ugh,” I opened my eyes, but Charlie was already moving out of my personal space.
“I will go see what you have to eat,” Charlie said, heading towards the door, “unless you have any requests that you already have in mind that I will find in your kitchen.”
I pushed my lips out to the side, knowing he wasn’t going to find much.
I think that gave him a non-verbal answer because he laughed, “I’ll go explore.”
“Charlie,” I motioned him over and pointed at my back pocket in my slacks that the hospital gave me to leave in since my jumper was ruined when they cut me out of it.
“Take the money in my wallet if you need to go to the store over by the incline on E Sycamore and Shiloh Street. If there isn’t enough or you run out, just credit my account at the Company Store around the corner, yeah? ”
He came over to take my wallet, but when he grabbed it, I pulled him down for another quick kiss, because I just can’t get enough now.
I couldn’t wait to hold him tonight, if he let me.
After he straightened back up, he surprised me by reaching for the book on my nightstand and leaving it for me in arm’s reach. He smiled and left.
He was so beautiful. He was a piece of coal being compressed, turning into a diamond.
My diamond.