Chapter 12 #2
She buried her face in his coat, too afraid to look at the answer to that question. She hadn’t fought, hadn’t told him how she felt. Too afraid to have her heart dashed to pieces, and so she’d never dared display it.
He would never know how much her games with him were all she would risk.
“Where?” he asked.
She glanced at the enormous circular staircase that spiraled through the heart of the Ivory Tower. A thousand steps, some said, though she’d never bothered to count them.
“The elevation chamber. I want some privacy.”
He glanced at the pair of ladies who’d followed them from the ballroom and sent them fleeing with a glare. “Problem solved.”
“Don’t argue. You can’t carry me the entire way down those stairs. We’re on the ninth floor.”
His face turned to hers, hints of amber burning around his pupil. “What happened?”
She shook her head. She had to get him out of here before he erupted again. “The elevation chamber.”
The liveried footman nodded to them as if he saw ladies being carried out of the ballroom every night. The polished brass doors to the elevation chamber slowly opened, revealing the smooth brass panels of the walls.
Will carried her inside and the doors slid shut.
She gestured for him to put her down. A frown drew his eyebrows together, but he complied.
“What the hell happened?” The chamber lurched into movement and he grabbed at the wall, his eyes wild.
“I went for some air on the balcony.” There was no getting around the truth. “Colchester came out after me.”
Will’s gaze dropped to her bloodied glove. His nostrils flared. “He cut you.”
The words were a promised threat. She had to diffuse the situation. “I broke his nose. It’s an even trade.”
“Lena.”
“It’s barely even a scratch—”
“You were terrified,” he snapped. Turning, he swung a fist at the wall and the brass panel caved beneath his fist.
She flinched. “Please. Don’t.”
Reining himself in with a visible clenching of his will, he slid a hand down the wall. “I wouldn’t hurt you. You know that. I’d never hurt you.”
She realized she was pressed back against the far wall, her nerves strung too tightly to relax with his temper riding the chamber like a cyclone.
“Yes, I was scared,” she said. “But I’m safe now. That’s all that matters.”
“What did he do to you? What did he say?”
He threatened to kill me. She paled and shook her head.
The steady jolt as the steam engines deep in the Ivory Tower’s cellars winched them down became almost hypnotic. Will didn’t find them so. He prowled the small room, his hands clasped behind his back and his eyes bright with anger.
“I hate small spaces,” he said, too much white showing in his eyes.
And she suddenly realized his temper wasn’t only strung so tightly because of Colchester. “Does it—does it remind you of the cage?” She had to clear her throat to get the words out.
His gaze cut to hers and he nodded.
“Here,” she said, slipping her hand into his. “I’m here.”
Nodding at her, he looked away. But his fingers slid through hers, squeezing hard.
“The cage weren’t so bad. I could see through the bars.
” His expression darkened. As if he saw something else, something beyond the smooth walls of the elevation chamber.
“When I disobeyed they used to beat me unconscious. But as I grew older the threat of that didn’t scare me as it used to.
” Licking his lips. “There were a cellar. Deep underground. They used to lock me in there. For days. Or weeks. No way o’ knowin’, it were so dark. Not even a rat down there.”
A little boy, lost in the dark. Her heart ached for him. “You’re free now.”
Will’s gaze met hers. “I ain’t free, Lena. Not yet. It’s just, the cage’s bigger now. All o’ Whitechapel to roam.”
“But you’re here now.”
An angry twist of his expression. “’Til the treaty’s signed. I have to make sure the Norwegians sign it, else I’m back in the ’Chapel and the others, those like me, are still in their chains.”
His words took her breath.
“That’s what they promised you?” A disaster. An absolute disaster. “They promised you freedom?”
“Me and every verwulfen in the Empire.”
She leaned back against the wall, hand to her chest. Will was more involved in this than she’d expected. By moving against him, working against him, she was threatening to destroy his chances of freedom.
She couldn’t do it.
But what about Charlie? Her hand dropped to her side. What was she going to do? Heat ached behind her eyes.
“Lena?”
Will waited for a reply. She couldn’t think quickly enough. “The jarl’s daughter seemed to take a liking to you,” she said automatically, as if her heart didn’t feel the blow. “If you charmed her—” She couldn’t say anymore. The words shriveled in her mouth.
“I don’t know nothin’ ’bout charm.”
Lena laughed, a miserable little sound. She had to get out of here. The walls felt like they were closing in on her. “That’s the truth.”
The elevation chamber came to a shuddering halt and she spun around. The bell rang and the doors started to open. Lena stepped through them as soon as they were wide enough to accommodate her.
One more flight of stairs to the ground entrance. She gathered her pink skirts and started dashing down them, but Will leaped in front of her, a frown on his face. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” She tried to push past, but he blocked her way. Standing two steps below her put his face on a level with hers. “Will, I’m tired. I want to go home. This is not—”
“Your scent changed.” He took a step up, his thighs pressing against her skirts. “As soon as I told you what they’d promised.”
Did guilt have its own scent? She pressed her fingertips against his chest. Whether to hold him at bay or draw him closer, she didn’t know. The superfine of his coat was soft beneath her fingers.
“It changed again,” he admitted, little sparks of molten copper flaring in his irises. “When you mentioned Lady Astrid.” His head lowered, gaze dropping to her mouth. “Just as it’s changed now.”
Lena’s heart started beating faster. Every emotion, every hope, dream, and despair she thought she’d kept hidden from him was betrayed by her scent.
She met his eyes and couldn’t read the look in them.
Hot amber. Eyes that she could drown in if he let her.
The color of them softened, melted, as he leaned closer.
His intentions stole her breath. He meant to kiss her. In the foyer of the Ivory Tower, in front of anyone who walked down the stairs. Exhilaration leaped through every nerve in her body.
“Don’t you dare,” she whispered.
He paused, his mouth an inch from hers. “I never understand you.” His eyes darkened with heat. “Yes or no, Lena?”
Warm breath against her lips. Her hand softened on his chest. She knew the answer before her traitorous mouth could say the words. And so did he.
Will captured the yes on her lips, his hands cupping her face and tilting it up to him. The first taste of him was intoxicating. Lena clutched his lapels and rose on her toes.
The world around them faded. All she could feel was the heat of his hard body, pressed firmly against hers, and the taste of his mouth, of champagne and lemon tarts.
Darting her tongue against his, she swallowed his soft moan.
As if sensing permission, his own tongue met hers and he devoured her, all hot, male possession.
Will’s hand splayed over her bottom and he wrenched her against him.
Every burning inch. She could feel the layers of fabric bunching between them, and the hint of his shaft, pressed hard against her hips.
Wanting more, needing more, she slid her hands into his hair, abandoning herself to the taste of his mouth.
There was no skill involved, no finesse, none of the careful kisses she’d flirted with in the Echelon.
Nothing but hunger and the barely contained raw fury she could sense beneath his skin.
Taking him to bed would never be tame. Never safe. And she wanted it more than she’d ever wanted anything in her life.
“Take me home,” she whispered, before she dared think about it. “Your home.”
Will lifted his head, an iron stillness running through his body. Hot little sparks of copper burned in his gaze and she knew instantly she’d said the wrong thing.
She kissed him again, biting at his bottom lip, but he didn’t rise to meet her. Cupping her face in both hands, Will drew back, breathing hard, his forehead pressed to hers.
“Lena.” A word full of hunger and denied need. “I can’t. We can’t.”
She slid her hands down his chest, hovering over his abdomen. “Yes, we can. Nobody would know.” A shiver ran through her. “I want you, Will. I need you. Need this. It’s not a game to me.” The last few words were a whisper.
He shuddered, eyes closed, fighting something she didn’t understand. “Can’t.” He tore away from her, red heat flushing his cheeks. The look he shot her was dark, dangerous. Hungry. Slowly he shook his head. “Even this should never have happened.”
He might as well have stabbed her in the heart.
“You wanted me,” she whispered.
“What I want and what I should do ain’t the same.” He ran his hands over his head, disheveling the neat queue. Strands of thick honey-gold cascaded around his face, caressing the stark cheekbones.
The denial rocked her. As if in mockery, her pulse raced through her veins, something hot and heavy throbbing between her thighs. Her body had not realized what the rest of her had.
“Why?”
“Because I’m verwulfen, Lena.”
“I don’t care. You know I don’t care—”
Will caught her wrists. “I do.”
Everything she’d ever feared. Heat flushed behind her eyes and she turned her face away. This had turned into one of the most horrendous nights she’d ever had.
“Let go of me,” she said.
Moments ticked by. Then he let her go and stepped away. Finally some space to breathe. Swallowing hard, she forced her tears back and clutched at her ruined gloves. “You may as well return to the ball,” she said. “You have a job to do. I’ll find my way to the carriage.”
“Lena—”
“I’d rather you went back. I want to go home.” Wherever that might be. “To Waverly Place.”
Unable to bear his presence anymore, she pushed past in a flurry of skirts and made her escape.