Chapter 44
FORTY-FOUR
noia
As soon as we step inside, Goonie jumps down from his perch at the window to wind himself between our legs, meowing impatiently.
“Yes, I know. We abandoned you.” I scoop him up. “It’s not like I left you with extra food and your favorite treats or anything.”
Ryder drops our bags by the door and stretches, his shirt riding up to expose a strip of tattooed skin above his jeans.
Memories of last night flood back with vivid clarity and I’m momentarily distracted.
“Noia.”
“Huh?” My eyes flick up and he tilts his head with a knowing grin.
“I’ll unpack the camping gear if you want to feed His Majesty,” he says, nodding at Goonie purring loudly against my chest.
“Deal.” I carry Goonie to the kitchen and set him down by his food bowl. “Sheesh. You’d think we left you alone for weeks instead of just one night.”
After filling his bowl and refreshing his water, I head upstairs to unpack. My inner walls and thighs ache as I move around the room, making me smile to myself.
I toss my dirty clothes into the hamper and step into the shower. When I get out, I smell something cooking downstairs.
Pulling on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt, I head back down to the kitchen.
Ryder is stirring something on the stove.
“Smells amazing,” I say, coming up behind him to peek over his shoulder.
“Just some pasta with a quick marinara,” he says with a shrug. “Nothing fancy, but I figured we could both use some carbs after last night.”
Heat floods my cheeks when he looks down at me with a wicked grin.
“How ‘bout I open a bottle of wine?” I ask, trying to distract myself from the way his shoulders flex as he stirs the sauce.
“Sounds good.”
We move around the kitchen together like we’ve been doing it forever. I set the table while Ryder cooks, and soon we’re sitting kitty-corner from one another.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”
“Hmm?” I twirl pasta around my fork.
“Why did you cancel your tattoo appointment?”
The question catches me off guard. “Um…”
“Jax mentioned it.” He takes a sip of wine, eyes never leaving mine.
Suddenly nervous, I set my fork down. “I don’t know. I guess I got cold feet?”
“About what? The tattoo itself or...” He hesitates. “Or because of me?”
“Both, maybe?” I sigh. “I mean, you remember. The appointment just popped up in my alerts out of the blue the same night your stuff showed up, and it kind of freaked me out.”
“What did you want to have done?”
“A phoenix.” I shrug, feeling a little self-conscious. “Rising from the ashes and all that. I know it’s super cliché, but it felt symbolic after everything I went through with my mom, with Eric and where I am now.”
Ryder nods thoughtfully.
“Now I’m thinking about getting something different.” I play with my pasta, avoiding his gaze. “Something that represents this crazy thing called my life. Maybe a quote on my side, across my ribs.”
“I could still do it for you.”
“You could?” I blink in surprise. “I mean, of course you could, but—”
“Actually,” he cuts in. “How about you come to work with me tomorrow and hang out? I’ve got an opening tomorrow after lunch. One of my clients had to reschedule.” Intense and focused, his gaze locks with mine. “Let me do your tattoo.”
My heart flutters. “Tomorrow? That’s... so soon.”
“I think it’s perfect timing, actually.” He grabs my hand, tracing slow circles on my palm with his thumb.
“You said you wanted something that represents new beginnings. What better way to honor our unique situation and what we’ve been doing to help you get your mojo back? Could be good inspiration as well.”
I hesitate, biting my lip. “I don’t know...”
“Come on, kitten,” he coaxes, dropping his voice to a low rumble, causing butterflies to take flight in my belly. “Let me put my mark on you.”
The possessive edge in his voice sends a shiver down my spine.
Unable to resist the pull of his stormy eyes, I relent. “Fine. I’ll come hang out and you can do my tattoo.”
His lips curve into a victorious smile. “Awesome.” Lifting my hand, he presses his lips to my knuckles. “I can start working on the design tonight.”
“Okay,” I agree, suddenly excited. “But I get final approval.”
“Of course.” Standing, he moves around the table and pulls me to my feet. “You’re going to love it, I promise.”
Sliding his hands down to my hips, he pulls me against him. “And I promise to be gentle,” he growls in my ear. “For your first time.”
I roll my eyes and grin. “You are such an ass.”
“Pretty sure we’ve already come to that conclusion,” he grins wickedly before capturing my mouth in a searing kiss.
Later, curled up in bed with Goonie purring at my feet, I scroll through tattoo designs on my phone. Nothing seems quite right. They’re all too generic, too universal, or just not... me.
With a sigh, I toss my phone aside and close my eyes, trying to visualize what I would want permanently etched on my skin. Something meaningful. Something that captures this crazy, unexpected chapter of my life.
The squeak of my bedroom door makes me open my eyes. Ryder, shirtless and barefoot, is standing in the doorway with a sketchbook in his hand.
My hearts skips when he leans against the doorjamb all sexy and shit. “Can’t sleep?”
I shake my head. “Just thinking about tomorrow.”
“I came up with an idea.” He pushes off the frame and comes over to sit on the edge of the bed. “If you’re interested.”
Curious, I sit up as he opens his sketchbook and turns it toward me.
On the page is a beautifully rendered sketch of the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland, his enigmatic smile stretching across his face as he fades into wisps of smoke.
Beneath the image, in an elegant, flowing script, are the words:
We’re All Mad Here
My breath catches. “Alice in Wonderland.”
“I remember you told me it was one of your favorite books as a kid.” His voice is soft. “And it seemed... fitting.”
I trace my finger over the quote and something clicks into place. “It does kinda feel like I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole.”
“Right?” He chuckles. “A man with a tragic past who appeared in your kitchen out of nowhere and a writer who creates fictional worlds—it is all a bit mad, isn’t it?”
“It’s perfect,” I whisper as I study the intricate details.
The cat Ryder rendered is both whimsical and slightly dark. With intelligent eyes that seem to look right through you, they glint with mischief as his body dissolves into nothingness. Smoke curls and twists around the letters making them look as if they are floating.
“Did you just draw this?”
“Yeah.” Rubbing the back of his neck, he almost looks shy. “I was thinking maybe here.” Reaching out, he lifts up my shirt, brushing his fingers along my ribcage, just below my breast. “The cat could wrap around your side, with the quote following the curve.”
His touch makes me shiver and my skin erupts in a riot of goosebumps. “Yes,” I breathe. “That’s exactly where I want it.”
“I can adjust anything you don’t like,” he offers. His eyes stay locked with mine as his fingers continue to slowly caress my skin, but I shake my head.
“No. It’s...” I search for the right words. “It’s exactly what I didn’t know I wanted.”
Something intense and possessive flashes in his eyes. “Good.”
I lean forward to kiss him and his tongue slides lazily along mine as his hand slides up my side, thumb brushing the underside of my naked breast.
“Stay in my room tonight,” I murmur against his mouth.
He pulls back, searching my face. “You sure?”
“Very sure.” I scooch over making room for him on the bed.
With a groan, he sets the sketchbook on the nightstand and slides in beside me, pulling me into his arms. “Just to sleep,” he says, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “You’re going to need to save your strength for tomorrow.”
I snuggle against his chest and breathe him in. “Thank you. It’s better than anything I could have imagined.”
“Just wait until you see it on your skin,” he murmurs, his voice already growing heavy with sleep. “It’s going to be beautiful. Just like you.”
When I wake up the next morning, Ryder is already gone.
Downstairs, I find a note on the kitchen counter.
Sorry, kitten. Something came up and I had to go in early. Meet me at the shop at noon for lunch? -R
I walk into Skin & Ink at 11:45.
The shop is busy and I immediately spot Ryder sitting at his station, bent over a client’s arm. The buzz of his tattoo gun is a steady rhythm that somehow feels oddly soothing.
Claire waves at me from behind the front desk. “Hey! You look… relaxed.”
Heat floods my cheeks.
“Ryder’s been humming all morning.” She grins over at him, then looks at me. “And that man never hums.”
When I glance back over, he’s cleaning up his station while his client examines her fresh ink in the mirror with delight.
Claire follows my gaze and nods at the leather couch. “Why don’t you grab a seat? Would you like some coffee?”
“Sure. Thanks.”
I settle onto one of the leather sofas in the waiting area, watching Ryder work. There’s something mesmerizing about the way he moves—confident and in his element—that makes my heart thump extra hard.
When he looks up and catches me staring, he flashes me a devastating smile and my stomach flips.
After his client leaves, Ryder strides over, leaning down to press a quick kiss to my lips. “Ready for lunch?”
“I am,” I admit, standing up. “Where are we going?”
“Actually.” His eyes twinkle with mischief. “I had something else in mind.”
Before I can ask what, he grabs my hand and leads me toward the back of the shop and into a small break room. The space is cozy with a small kitchenette, round table, and a small couch.
“Jax picked up some sandwiches from the deli down the street,” Ryder explains, opening the mini-fridge. “I thought we could eat here, and I can show you the final design before we get you into my chair.”
My pulse quickens. “You finished it?”
“This morning.” He sets the sandwiches and a couple cans of sparkling water on the table. “I couldn’t sleep, so I came in early and worked on it.”
There’s something thrilling about the idea of Ryder permanently marking my skin, but it doesn’t stop me from fidgeting.
“You good?”
“Just nervous,” I admit.
“Don’t worry.” His voice is gentle. “I promise I’ll take good care of you.”