17. Chapter 17
17
T he high faded far more quickly this time, though the effects of the communion remained. By the time I stepped into the steaming shower, I no longer felt dazed or floaty, but the sigils on the walls and windows were still visible. I studied them as I stood under the streaming water, my hair knotted atop my head to keep it dry. The sigils glowed with that same silvery light as the markings on Gavin’s body, only these were accented by faint streaks of color—crimson, violet, teal, and sapphire blue.
Bastian opened the glass shower door and stepped in, his heated gaze skimming over my body. I admired him in return, studying the intricate tattoos covering his muscular body, the designs flowing seamlessly over his copper skin. The black ink seemed like a natural part of him with how perfectly it wove over and around his anatomy.
I moved aside, giving him access to the water streaming from the broad showerhead, and grabbed the bar of soap from the inset soap dish in the tile wall. I quickly lathered the soap in my hands and offered the bar to Bastian.
Gavin had been right to stop the sexfest when he did. Without the amped-up lust, the soreness between my legs became all too apparent. The first touch of my fingers between my legs brought a wince. My swollen labia felt bruised and incredibly tender.
“No shower fun, then?” Bastian asked, his teasing tone belied by the concern shining in his amber eyes.
I shook my head, offering him an apologetic smile, even though the sight of him stroking soap suds over his growing erection sent a jolt of desire to my core. I wanted him again. Even with the pain. But the knowledge that Micah was out in the living room, grappling with his new reality, doused my rebounding libido with ice water.
I reached past Bastian for the smaller, detachable showerhead, and used it to rinse myself. I hoped my awakening powers and my body’s need for immortal blood stabilized soon, or I would be in a lot of pain.
Or maybe I could attempt to feed without sex? Not that I minded the sex—at all—but I had a feeling that having to excuse myself to get it on with one of my guys every few hours was going to get old, fast. And would I just constantly be sore? Sex with both Bastian and Gavin had been intense. What was it going to be like when seven partners were involved? I couldn’t even fathom how that would work.
In the dream—or prophecy, or whatever it was—the group dynamic had felt so natural, but it had all been such a blur of lust that I couldn’t recall the mechanics of it. I hadn’t even seen all my partners, but I had known there were seven. I honestly wasn’t even sure if they were all male . It was all so hazy. Gavin and Bastian had been there, as well as Thane and Ash, the two mountainous vampires guarding the loft. But I couldn’t recall any specifics about the other three. Would I know them when I saw them, as I had known Thane and Ash?
My gaze lingered on Bastian’s wrist, where I had taken his blood. The wound had already closed, though there was still a faint red line from the cut he had made. There was no silver marking curving around his wrist or anywhere else on his body. No bonding sigil. Nothing tying us together. Because I hadn’t actually bitten him? Or because he hadn’t taken my blood as well?
I had been dazed when Gavin first dragged me into Bastian’s room, but I vaguely recalled Gavin saying something about our blood bond forming because he had taken my blood earlier. Did that mean a blood exchange was always involved? I knew so little about my powers.
Bastian moved closer, taking the shower head from my hand and replacing it on the wall. He turned back to me, raising one hand and brushing the pad of his thumb over my furrowed brow. “A lot has happened in the last few hours,” he said, his voice a gentle thrum. “How are you doing?”
My gaze raised to meet Bastian’s, and my chin trembled. I closed my eyes, drawing a slow, deep breath into my lungs and reining in my flailing worries. When I lifted my lids, I had better control over my emotions. My lips spread into a quavering smile, and I shook my head. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “I’ve been running away from all of this for so long, I think I convinced myself it wasn’t real.” I let out a weak laugh. “And now there’s no avoiding it. It’s real. And Micah is here , and he knows –”
“Wait,” Bastian said. “Micah’s here?”
My eyes opened wide at the familiarity in Bastian’s voice, then narrowed to suspicious slits as I backed away from him. He had been watching me for months, posing as a library intern by day, and as the stray cat I had taken in by night.
“Did you know?” I asked, enunciating each word clearly. I had opened up to him. Confided in him. I had shared heartbreaking pieces of my past with him like they were some big secret, and the thought that he may have already known made me feel like such an idiot.
Bastian became very still.
“Did you know Micah was my son before I told you about Wes and—” I swallowed my rising rage. “And everything that happened when I was on the street?”
Bastian clenched his jaw, the tendons in his neck tensing. “I suspected Micah’s relationship to you, but I didn’t know for sure, and I had no idea about the rest. About what happened to you on the street.”
“Did you tell anyone your suspicions about Micah?” I asked, my voice razor-edged.
“No.”
I searched his stony expression, his wary eyes. “Why not?”
“Because by the time I started putting the pieces together about who Micah really was to you, I was already in love with you,” he said matter-of-factly. “I couldn’t betray you like that.”
“But you could invade my privacy by pretending to be my cat,” I said, hurtling the words at him like stones. “You could lie to me.”
“That was different,” he snapped. “I was already there. The damage was done.”
My chest heaved with anger. “You should have told me!” I practically shouted.
Bastian stepped closer. “I would have lost you!” he hissed. “I was born a bastard, so I guess this makes me a selfish one, but I’m just fine with that because I was there when you needed me. Because you’re still alive, and that is all that matters to me.”
My anger fizzled away as I searched his eyes, seeing only honesty. Only truth. It had been so long since I had felt like I could depend on another person that the idea of cracking the hard shell that had formed around my heart seemed impossible.
“I don’t know if I can be what you want me to be,” I admitted, tears welling suddenly. “I’m scared, Bas.” I choked on a sob. “I’m scared because if I let myself love you, I know in my heart that I’ll lose you. You’ll leave me. Everyone leaves me.”
His arms were suddenly around me, holding my slick body close to his. I clung to him, digging my nails into his back.
Bastian cradled my face in his hands and tilted my head back so he could claim a kiss. “I will never leave you by choice,” he growled into my mouth.
I tore my lips away from his and leaned back enough that I could search his gaze. There was only one way to guarantee that. Only one way to ensure he was truly mine—forever.
I drew my bottom lip between my teeth, biting down until my canine punctured the flesh and the tang of blood touched my tongue. I lifted my chin, offering Bastian my bloodied lips.
He hesitated for a single heartbeat, and then his mouth was on mine.
Power welled within me as our tongues tangled. It surged out from my chest, a warm tingle that electrified the hairs all over my body and made my blood sing. Blood that was now inside Bastian, too. The power coiled, gaining strength and potency inside me.
We gasped as one, breaking apart as moonlight exploded from my skin. It surrounded us, washing over Bastian and sinking into him.
I stepped back, watching in awe as my moonlight slid under his skin, coalescing around his wrist in a sigil identical to the one encircling Gavin’s neck.
And as the last of my moonlight faded, darkness tunneled my vision, my knees buckled, and the floor rushed up to meet me.
Bastian caught me, and then the darkness swallowed me whole.