37. Luna
THIRTY-SEVEN
LUNA
Luna stood by the door, watching as the physical therapist and nurse helped Valerio take a few steps. He was expected to walk from the bed to the bathroom a couple times a day, but he had already advanced past that. Now, he walked up and down the hallway, pushing himself even though he should have been recovering and resting.
She knew it was because he wanted his strength back. After the conversation a week ago when they finally revealed what their plans were, he was anxious to get moving again. The first time Luna saw him trying to get up by himself, she nearly had a heart attack.
He was perfectly capable of deciding what he wanted to do for his health on his own, but she had become particularly protective of him lately. For the past two weeks, while he was in the hospital and back at home, she’d had the same recurring nightmare. The one where she was forced to watch him bleed out, only this time he didn’t wake up. When she awoke, she rushed to the bathroom to wash her hands until they were red and dry to the point of peeling. She swore she could still feel his blood on her hands, but in the light it was never there.
She only managed to get a couple hours of sleep a night. Between the nightmares and putting her ear against his lips to feel his deep breaths, she was on edge constantly. It seemed like everyone in the house was on edge more than usual.
When Finn and Valerio had finally talked the other night, they didn’t even bother to fight or bicker like they usually would. Instead, the conversation between them was direct and surrounded their plans for their fathers. It was almost as if they had reached a mutual understanding, that once their fathers were gone, they would be the ones running everything. Either they ended the cycle of abuse and violence or they let it keep going.
“You’re going to overexert yourself,” the nurse told Valerio.
“I’m fine,” he said, dismissing her. “I can do a couple more laps.”
Luna shook her head, approaching the group in the hallway. “Let’s pick this up later. You’re not going to get better if you don’t give yourself rest.”
“I’ve been resting,” Valerio muttered.
“Have you always been this stubborn?” the doctor asked.
“Yes,” Luna answered before anyone else could. “It’s getting late. You guys can go. I’ll help him back into bed.”
She ignored the way Valerio rolled his eyes and instead focused on scheduling a time for them to come back tomorrow. She turned to him, grabbing his arm.
“I love when you play nurse, but I’m seriously fine,” he said. With careful steps, they made their way back into the bedroom. He let out a loud sigh when he finally sat back down on the bed.
Luna narrowed her eyes. “That doesn’t sound fine.”
“What can I say, you take my breath away,” he said with a small smirk.
This time Luna was rolling her eyes. “Very smooth.”
He grabbed her hands, pulling her down to sit on his lap. She immediately fell into his warmth, finding peace in his heartbeat against her back. “I know you’re worried,” he said, surrounding her with his arms. “You have every right to feel that way. But remember, I’m not going anywhere.”
She shut her eyes. She wanted to tell him he almost did go somewhere, that she was worried because she believed that at any moment he would be ripped from her arms again. Instead, she nodded. “I know.”
He pressed a kiss to her forehead, allowing it to linger. “Let’s go downstairs to eat. I’m starving,” he told her.
“I can bring it up,” she suggested, standing.
He shook his head. “It should be me bringing you food in bed, not the other way around.”
“You’ll have your entire life to do it,” she said, helping him off the bed.
Despite Luna’s protests, Valerio made his way down the stairs. She could see the improvements, but something in her mind refused to believe it was real. She kept her arms on him the entire time, providing the support she knew he needed but was too stubborn to admit to.
They hadn’t even approached the kitchen yet when loud laughs rang through the halls, reminding them of the full house at the moment. They walked to the kitchen table, ignoring the arguing going on between Augustus and Cecilia. It happened far more often than Luna would have liked.
“Look who decided to join us,” Gianna mused from the kitchen counter.
Valerio pulled out a chair for Luna, forcing her to sit down first. She sent him a glare, but he pretended not to see it. Instead, he approached the stove to grab whatever food had been made.
“He refuses to rest,” Luna told her, rubbing at her eyes. They burned and ached with exhaustion.
“You look like you haven’t slept in weeks,” Blair said, a frown on her face as she took the seat beside Luna. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Yeah, I just haven’t been sleeping well. Why are they going at it again?” It was an easy way to move the conversation away from herself.
Blair snorted. “You know how they are. This is their foreplay.”
Luna’s eyes drifted back to Valerio, who was nodding his head at something Allister was telling him. He shifted slightly on his legs. Not noticeable to anyone else, but Luna wasn’t anyone else. She knew he should be sitting down instead of moving around like he wasn’t shot in the back two weeks ago.
She moved to stand up, but Valerio was already turning around to walk back to her. He set two bowls on the table, some kind of pasta with marinara sauce. “Apparently Dante made it. Not sure how good it’ll taste,” he told her, taking the seat to her right.
“Hey, fuck you. I know how to cook.” Dante grinned, slapping Valerio on the shoulder. Luna flinched as if it had impacted her.
Cecilia stormed over to the table. “God, I can’t stand men,” she said with a huff.
“Trust me, I know,” Gianna said, taking a seat. “There’s too much testosterone around here. I’m suffocating.”
“I thought this was your dream scenario,” Dante said, cackling at his own joke.
“It would be if the people I’m related to weren’t here as well,” she said, rolling her eyes.
Luna watched Valerio eat his food, holding the hand he’d placed on her thigh tightly. She grabbed a bite herself, forcing it past her lips. The pasta could have been delicious, but anything going into her stomach tasted like acid these days.
The feeling only got worse when Finn walked over to them, a somber look on his face. “Father called,” he said, taking the seat directly across from Luna.
She dropped the fork on the table. “What did he say?”
The simultaneous dread and fear that filled her came over her so quickly that if she was standing, she was sure she would have fallen over. Valerio tightened his hand on her thigh.
“He was asking about the baby, how you’re feeling,” Finn said, tapping his fingers on the table. “Mom was wondering why you haven’t called or met up with her. She wants to go with you to one of your appointments.”
“What did you tell them?” Valerio asked, his voice hard. His eyes narrowed harshly at Finn.
Finn rolled his eyes. “I told them she was sick with morning sickness. Said you’ve been resting for the baby.”
It was silent for a few moments until Dante spoke up. “So, there is no baby. I just wanted to remind everyone in case we forgot.”
“Yeah, we fucking know,” Luna muttered, rubbing her hand over her forehead. “Does it even matter anymore?”
“Well, if we’re planning to get rid of them, then no, I guess it doesn’t,” he said, shrugging.
“They seem caring enough now,” Finn said. “Maybe we don’t have to do anything drastic. Maybe there’s a possibility an actual child could do what we need done.”
Luna shook her head frantically. “No.”
“I don’t see how having a child is any worse than killing our father or his father,” Finn said, pointing at Valerio. “I mean, you can’t possibly want your father dead. Are you willing to pull the trigger?”
“Don’t tell me you’re getting cold feet,” Allister said.
“You can’t fucking talk. No one is telling you to kill your fucking father,” Finn spit out.
“Don’t be naive,” Luna told him.
“I’m naive? Are you kidding me?” he said. “You’re naive for thinking you have the fucking guts to kill your own father.”
“Why would a grandchild change any of their minds? They had their own fucking children and still managed to be the worst people in the world. No baby is going to change that, ever. And I’m not risking it,” Luna bit back.
Finn ignored her completely, turning his attention to Valerio. “What do you think about this?”
“It’s a complicated situation,” he said.
Luna looked at him, trying to find some—any—indication of what he was thinking. Yes, it was complicated, but he couldn’t change his mind now. Not after everything.
“What does that mean?” she asked.
“It means that this shouldn’t be a rushed decision,” Valerio said. “We need to make sure we know what we’re doing, as I mentioned before.”
Luna tensed. Her eyes met Dante’s, who looked at her with a look that seemed to think the same: they were pulling out. The fear was back. Valerio wasn’t on her side. Why wasn’t he on her side? Why would he agree to everything, seeming like he cared, just to pull back?
Exhaustion crept up with the paralyzing feeling of betrayal. Not Valerio; he couldn’t do it to her. Their parents already had; she couldn’t handle it if he did too.
“Did they think before they decided to shoot you in the back?” Luna asked, her voice no more than a whisper. “Did they think before they sent a man to nearly strangle me to death in my apartment?”
“Luna,” Valerio said softly.
It was too late.
She was already grabbing the bowl, sending it crashing against the wall beside them. “Did any of them think before they ruined our lives? No, they didn’t. They don’t deserve a single thought more. They deserve to be brought to their knees, forced to stare at the barrel of a gun before they’re sent straight to hell for what they’ve done.”
Her screams echoed through the kitchen, causing an eerie silence. She stood, pulling at her hair. “My hands were soaked in your blood while I tried to save your life. You almost died! Don’t you care about that even a little bit?”
“Of course I do,” Valerio said, attempting to stand up.
“I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t fucking breathe. As long as they’re living, breathing, and plotting, I will not know a moment of peace. I need them gone forever,” Luna screamed.
“You haven’t been sleeping or eating?” he asked, his eyes narrowed. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because you need to get better,” she told him, her shoulders falling. “Because a couple weeks ago I was sure you were going to die. A couple weeks before that, I was sure I was going to die. A few months before that, my father was willing to sell me off to anyone who offered him the most money. My entire life before that I never got to make a single choice for myself because of him . He doesn’t deserve the option of staying alive, not after everything he did to me.”
Her chest heaved with every breath she took. The truth was out there, seeping into each and every one of them now.
She needed a minute where she didn’t think about anything. Just one moment of peace, true peace. Until then, she could feel herself slipping deeper and deeper into her own misery, one she wasn’t sure she could get out of.