Scene 5 #6
“You’ve done this before?” I try not to sound too accusatory as I imagine who it could have been with.
Did he lay over her like he is now with me and tell her he could teach her, too?
Did he spend a night with her when he was gone from me, and, more importantly, did he have a nightmare and turn to her to help him through it?
Now I’m just getting mad even though I know it’s irrational.
“Twice,” he answers steadily, gentling the sting of his truth with a soft brush of his fingers to my cheek. “But that was when you were only my sister. You won’t really blame me for that, will you?”
Part of me demands I stay angry, but the other part begs me not to push him away after he’s been away for three days. I reach up and lightly trace the line of his jaw. “I want to blame you, but you’re right. Anything that happened before me doesn’t count.”
“No, it doesn’t,” Sully agrees with what sounds like a bit of relief. “You’re the one I’m here with now and for the rest of my life. For what it’s worth, this will be my first time in a way, too, because I’ve never done it with someone I loved. You get my heart along with the rest of me.”
That mollifies my jealousy. To have a part of him just for me. “I think I like that,” I say softly.
“So do I. So very fucking much.” He takes my hand, dusting the back with a sweet kiss before placing it on his shoulder. “Now how about you just keep these right here and let me kiss you.”
It’s more of a slow, steady coaxing instead of a question as he slides an arm beneath my head, but it sounds good to me. But then his thigh nudges mine, parting my legs the tiniest bit, and the feeling is so unfamiliar and thrilling.
“Don’t tense up,” he murmurs. “Just some kissing for now, yeah?”
“Yeah,” I manage through a tight throat, forcing my fingers to relax so my nails don’t cut him. I’m nervous but excited. “It’s just…a lot to feel for the very first time when I don’t know what’s going to happen.”
“Only kisses,” Sully promises. “Not gonna mess with your nightgown until you’re ready.”
Immediately, all of me relaxes. If that’s what he says, then I know it’s true. I’m safe with him no matter what. “Okay,” I whisper, allowing my curious fingers to play with the back of his neck.
“Fuck,” he says with a shiver. “That feels so good, Emma.” Then his head lowers to mine, and it’s my turn to shiver at the pleasure. The longer he lays claim to my mouth, the more natural it feels for my legs to widen, making a cradle for him to settle into.
I can’t breathe, but it’s not only because of the weight of him.
It’s so much more. All of my senses are overtaken by Sullivan.
His woodsy scent that grows more intoxicating with every breath.
The bristle of his days-old beard and the slightly salty taste of his skin as his tongue teases mine.
The way his voice deepens beyond belief as he murmurs sweet nothings when we part for air.
It’s both the same and different from the day at the creek, because now we don’t have to stop. In fact, the more he kisses me, the bolder I become. If I want to trace the dip of his back or the sharp edge of his shoulder blade with my bare hands, I can.
And I do.
“Yes.” He groans his encouragement into the crook of my neck. “Touch me.” As if they have a mind of their own, my hands learn the shape of every muscle. And there certainly is quite a bit to discover.
“Sullivan!” I arch and tangle my fingers in his hair when his head moves down to the tops of my breasts. “Oh God, Sullivan!” Never did I ever dream a mouth could elicit such a sensation. But this is how it feels on top of my robe and nightgown.
What would it be like if his mouth were on my bare skin?
“Take it off.” I don’t even know if he can hear me with how soft my words were, but he stills.
“Robe or nightgown?” He tilts his head and releases a nervous breath as I comb through his hair.
“Both.”
“I don’t want to rush you.”
Instead of answering with words, I reach between us and untie my robe. Only a little more of my breasts is revealed as the material loosens, but by the way Sully reacts, one would think I’d completely disrobed.
“Fuck, Emma.” His swallow is audible. “Are you sure?”
I nod jerkily and try not to choke on my excitement. “Yes. I want to feel you without anything in the way.”
“I want that, too.” Sully’s body blocks the moonlight as he lifts up. “Help me take it off of you.” I do, and when the cooler air brushes over my naked body, he mistakes my shiver for fear. “Don’t be afraid. I’m never gonna hurt you, just wanna make you feel good.”
“I’m not afraid,” I tell him shyly as I hug my chest. “I just didn’t realize how warm my nightclothes kept me.”
Sully’s teeth flash in the night as he helps me lie back. “I’ll keep you warm, darlin’.”
And he does, scalding both my body and my blood as he settles atop me.
He picks up where he left off, and I almost wheeze when the wet heat of his mouth wraps around my nipple.
But the moment his lips tighten around the bud and gently suck, a lightning bolt shoots from his mouth to between my thighs.
“Sullyyy,” I keen, digging my nails into his shoulders.
Taking my noises for the encouragement they are, he makes love to my breasts, alternating with teasing licks and sucks to one and the rough pad of his thumb to the sensitive tip of the other.
I squirm against him, opening my legs to better feel the hardness I discovered between his that day at the creek.
“Fuck, but the way you move under me,” he groans, rolling to the side to kick off his pants. Before I can think to look at what’s between his thighs, he settles on top of me once again. Following the demand of my body, I wrap both legs around him as his hardness glides over my core.
A core which suddenly feels very, very wet against him. “Sully!” I push at his shoulder even as my thighs tighten around him and prevent him from going far. “Am I…is it supposed to…to be…wet?”
“Mhmm, fuck yes. I need you to be soaking for me. That’s your body telling you how much you want me.” He punctuates his answer with another smooth stroke that has me trembling with need.
I pull his face to mine and search his shadowed eyes. “It must be true. Because I want you so desperately.” Maybe it’s a good thing he knows more about my body than I do.
Sully takes my mouth in a searing kiss as the desire between us rages even higher.
Every thrust of his hips becomes more urgent, and I meet his urgency with my own until he breaks away with a curse.
“Christ, Emma. How can you feel so fucking good?” He doesn’t expect an answer, though, because he tenderly brushes my hair out of my eyes and kisses the corner of my lips.
“We don’t have to go all the way tonight.
There are plenty of ways I can make us both feel good if you want our first time to be in a real bed. ”
I know what happens between a man and a woman—at least in theory—and I can’t deny that a comfortable bed would be my first choice.
Maybe Sully would be able to replace his bad memories with good ones of us if we were in a bed, but for now…
for this first time…out here in the clearing is a good second choice.
“All I need is for my first time to be with you.” I mirror his actions, running my fingers through his hair and softly kissing him. “Make me yours, Sullivan.”
Part of me expected him to immediately ravish me, but I should have known better.
Everything Sully does is deliberate, and this is no different.
Languidly, deliciously, his lips conquer mine until I’m drunk on desire for him.
Then he reaches down between us until something blunt brushes against the center of my legs.
“That’s my good girl, so wet for me. Hold on, darlin’. ”
When he slowly pushes inside me, I grimace. Too tight. God, there’s so much pressure. Maybe I should have looked at it before blindly trusting him, because how does he really know he can fit inside me?
“Relax for me.” Sully’s voice is strained. “You’ve gotta relax, darlin’.”
“I can’t,” I moan, fighting off no small amount of doubt and the tiniest bit of fear. “It’s too much, like you’re trying to separate my insides.” I shift to relieve the fullness, but that only makes it worse. How on earth do people do this when it won’t fit? “You must be too big.”
He lets out what could be either a groan or a pained laugh. “I’m only a little over halfway in.”
Over halfway, he says. All I can focus on is halfway. But then his teeth graze my neck, and when my body arches in response to the ticklish touch, he takes advantage of the split second my muscles surrender and surges the remaining distance into me.
“Sully!” My nails claw his shoulders as I cry out sharply at the throbbing invasion. This isn’t exactly the pleasure from before. Far from it.
“I’m sorry, darlin’,” he croons. “Deep breaths. I’m in now, but I’m not gonna move until you’re ready.
” He keeps his word, kissing my neck instead and dragging his hand up and down my side.
Finding the tip of my breast. Circling the bud with a rough thumb, then lightly pinching it, all while murmuring soft words of encouragement.
The night stars blur as the intensity begins to build again, and when he tentatively moves, my legs tighten around him. “Slow,” I beg. “Go slow.”