Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Kezia
“I’m not sure which one to choose.” I look around at the multitude of outfits laying all over the table and dressing room in the little boutique.
“You don’t have to choose. Get them all.” Merrick has been watching me for a good hour as I try on clothes, modeling each outfit for him as he sits like a king in the chair, admiring his princess.
“I can’t get them all,” I say, my heart pounding.
I’ve never really shopped before. I mean, here and there in life we’ve gone to stores, but never have I had a chance to just try on clothes I liked, let alone think I might even get to buy one or two.
I flip over the price tag on the daisy-yellow silky sundress I have on, and my eyes go wide.
“This is two hundred and six dollars. Just for one dress.”
The young woman who has been helping us brings over a few other outfits and hangs them on the hook in the open dressing room, then looks at Merrick.
“Going okay here, sheriff?” I can tell she’s flirting with him a little and I step forward, glaring at her and sitting down on his lap. “Your niece…” Her voice is questioning, hoping. “Friend… Finding what she needs?”
Merrick leans in and kisses my cheek and I give her a sneer.
“My babygirl likes everything in that pile there and over there and nothing is too good for her.” He reaches into his back pocket and hands her a card.
“Put it all on there, wrap everything up and we will be back to pick it up in an hour or so.” He pops the tag off the dress I’m wearing and hands it to her.
“We’ll take this one too. And the sandals she has on. She’ll wear them out.”
She gives me a salty smile, then spins on her heel back toward the front of the store.
Before we came to the boutique, Merrick took me to a little toy store in town.
It was like being in the North Pole. I never really had a Christmas, or birthdays and looking at all the stuffed animals and toys made me feel like I was a little girl again.
Merrick indulged me completely. Sitting on the floor with me having a play tea party with some teddy bears.
Then, trying to use a hula-hoop until we knocked over a display of American Girl dolls and almost got kicked out of the store.
He bought everything I touched, and the same as with the lady in the boutique, he told them to wrap it up and we would be back for it later.
After the toy store, it was a jewelry store. I’ve never been in a real one before and I was overwhelmed by the shimmering, glimmering trinkets. I didn’t dare think of choosing anything and truth is, I was a little embarrassed by the niggling hope of having something so precious.
We left without buying anything after Merrick had a talk with the owner who seemed familiar to him.
He took me to get a coffee, and we sat inside the little local coffee shop, chatting and lingering until we were finished.
Then, to my surprise, when we went back out to his truck, there was a little velvet box with a bow on my seat.
He put on the little anklet with a ballet dancer charm and a thick double clasp so I wouldn’t lose it.
He treats me like a real princess. Even this morning, we took a long shower after our deck activities and Merrick washed my hair and my body.
I feel so special with him, and the truth is, I feel more than just safe, I feel committed.
Like we are already deep into this relationship somehow, in a matter of a couple days.
I’ve never felt secure with anyone, ever, not even my so-called parents. It’s confusing, and the new hope I feel twists with old doubt inside of me.
I’ve never known what it’s like to have roots, and from our conversations this morning, Merrick has solid roots, not only here in the community but with his family. I don’t even know how that would feel.
It makes me think of my sister. Wondering if she’s okay. Wanting to tell Merrick about her. Even ask if we can maybe take her away as well…I shake the thought away. The fear they will come for me is one thing, but if two of us were to defect, they would surely send out an army to bring us back.
I don’t know what to do, there’s not right solution so I do my best to think of the wonder of the day, and hope somehow, someday I can get my sister to freedom as well.
“You feeling okay, baby?” Merrick brushes my cheek with his thumb as I lean into him, his hard legs under my rear end, the yellow sundress so soft on my skin.
“Yes. I’m a little tired but wide awake at the same time. A little sore, too, but I feel better than I have in as long as I can remember.”
“Good. You should always tell me, good and bad, how you feel, okay? I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s going on inside that beautiful head, heart and body of yours.”
I nod, agreeing, but deep down I wonder if I will ever be able to adjust to such a normal sort of life. What if the wanderlust that’s been my existence is so ingrained I can’t stay in one place for long? Merrick has a career, a position in the community, a family, a home…what if I can’t do this?
My life has been a revolving door of families and working people for what we can get.
I’ve never really belonged in a real family, but as I feel Merrick’s warmth next to me, I think I love him.
I think I’m in love with him. And when, not if, he leaves, it will destroy me.
Because I’ve never let myself feel anything like this before.
Fear clamps around my throat and I know I have to find a way to protect myself from the pain I know is coming.
“I have a surprise.” Merrick lifts me to my feet, then stands next to me, draping his arm around my shoulders.
“You’ve done enough for me already.”
“That will never be true, little one. But, we’re going to have lunch with my parents and a few friends. I want them to meet you.”
Panic stabs into my throat. Parents? Friends?
“I don’t know.” I shake my head, the hope too high a price to pay if this turns out not to be real.
“Come on.”
He leads me out of the store, everyone waving and saying their polite goodbye’s to the local sheriff, while shoot me sidelong glances as they whisper to each other.
We walk down Main Street, Merrick gripping my hand like he will never let go, and as we approach a corner, I see an older couple across the street, chatting with a woman and a young girl about my age, outside a diner with a sign above: The Over Easy.
“Merrick…” I stop, barely able to breathe. I’ve been a thief of sorts, a grifter, a user for so long…I can’t belong in this fairytale life. Especially not with the sheriff of the town. He’ll lose the respect of the community and maybe his job…
I feel like my insides are being rearranged. The thought of not being with Merrick is already bringing burning tears to my eyes but it’s so real all of a sudden. So normal.
The older couple looks our way and waves, and Merrick gives them a wave in return.
I feel so out of place it’s all I can do to not turn and run in the opposite direction, but Merrick just squeezes my hand and gives me a smile.
“They’re going to love you.” Merrick leans down and kisses me, long and slow, and for a moment I believe in everything, and I feel strong.
“I hope so.”
We cross the street, and I’m immediately clutched into embraces and given introductions as everyone smiles and laughs, pulling me into the warm, wonderful energy of people who obviously love and care about each other, with no agenda other than the bonds of family and friendship.
“You’ve been hiding this lovely young woman from us for how long?” Merrick’s father, Merrick Sr., puts his arm around me.
“No interrogations,” Merrick answers, playfully taking his father's arm from me and replacing it with his own.
“Old habits,” his mother says, pulling her husband’s hand into hers. “You take the badge off the man, but some things never change. Don’t make too much of our silliness, Kezia…and by the way, what a beautiful name. Is that a family name?”
“No ma’am. I’m not sure where it came from. I know I was born not far from here, but I was adopted so I don’t know much else.”
The woman to my left, Margaret, suddenly freezes, staring at me, and I lean into Merrick, feeling like I’m under the spotlight. The younger woman more my age to her left, with unicorn rainbow hair, smiles, and her fairy-like look is contrasted with an all-black ensemble and heavy combat boots.
“I know what it’s like to have an unusual name,” she says. “My mom was a bit of a hippie back in the day. And, geez, man, you’re eyes are amazing. I can barely stop looking at them…”
“Thanks.” I leave it at that as we all head into the diner where they have a big table waiting. Turns out, Margaret owns the place and Merrick set it up earlier today just so I could meet the people that are important in his life.
I’m quiet for a bit as we take our seats. They are all so familiar with each other, lovingly joking and chiding each other while we wait for our food, but after a few minutes I start to relax.
His parents are relationship goals. They kiss and can’t stop touching each other and it’s clear they are proud of Merrick. They ask simple, kind questions of me, just enough to show they are interested, but staying far away from the feeling of interrogation.
“Here we go.” An enormous man and two waitresses come over with trays of food, and start to set the family-style meal down the center of the table.
“So, Kezia, what is it you do? Or what would you like to do now that you’re here in Millington?” Merrick’s mom, Belinda asks.
I look at the generous helpings of every sort of comfort food. It’s been so long since I was allowed to eat unsupervised, my mouth is watering while my stomach gnaws on itself, ready for the delicious-smelling meal being laid out.
“Well, I mean, I love to dance. I’ve always wanted to teach. Maybe,” I say, hesitating on a shrug before going on, “like, a little dance school for kids or something? I don’t know, I’ve never really thought of what I would want.”
“Well, you’re going to need to do a lot of that now.” Merrick takes my hand, pulling it to his mouth and kissing my knuckles.
“Man.” Margaret gives him a smile. “You do go from zero to a hundred in the blink of an eye.”
“Nothing wrong with that,” his father chimes in. “I knew the minute I set my eyes on Belinda here she was mine. She was a girl from another town, passing through, but I knew. I knew when I saw her with her parents, having a picnic in the park, when I was a deputy and—”
Merrick’s mom puts her hand over her husband’s, blushing a little. “They’ve all heard this story before, you don’t need to tell it again.”
“Well, Kezia hasn’t heard it. Have you, dear?” He looks at me and I shake my head. His father is just an older version of Merrick. His size is not as thick, but his eyes are the same and the shape of his face is eerily similar.
“I’d love to hear the story.” I answer feeling warm and embraced by it all.
“See?” He smiles at his wife, and for a moment they just stare into each other’s eyes.
“Like I was saying, I knew right away. Took her father aside and told him I’d pay for them to spend the weekend right here in town at the Millington Inn which is still just down the street, so long as I could treat them all to dinner that night.
I think he was maybe expecting a hamburger and fries or something, on a deputy’s salary, but I made a deal with the best restaurant in town to have a five-star meal.
The owner was a friend, gave me a month to pay it off. ”
Merrick’s mom laughs. “My dad said he’d never seen so much food in all his life. He didn’t eat again for two days. How many courses was it?”
“Seven. And I spent the whole time trying to catch your eye.”
“You already had it, my love.”
Merrick’s dad nods. “The rest was history. Within a month, we were married, and we’ve barely spent a night away from each other since. If I could have married her that first day, I would have. I just knew.”
“Same here,” Merrick agrees and I’m melting inside. How can this be my life? Family and friends surrounding a table of food, all in my honor? Just to meet me?
“Well, eat up,” Margaret says. “Here, Kezia, these are Rodney’s famous chicken dumplings. They’re a house favorite…”
“Although we’ve never tasted them.” Summer interjects but I barely hear.
I wince back as Merrick reaches for the serving dish, pulling it toward him. “Sorry, I should have told you when I called this morning, Kezia has an allergy to poultry…chicken…turkey. Also eggs. We need to be very careful.”
Margaret goes silent, her face dropping, and I’m immediately uncomfortable again.
“I’m sorry. It’s fine. I usually eat lots of vegetables and rice.”
“It’s okay,” she says, but her voice is strange and even her daughter looks at her questioningly.
“You okay, Mom? That’s so odd…” Summer adds giving me a quizzical look but before I can ask what’s odd, her mom pushes her chair back and I’m suddenly embarrassed.
“Yes.” She says the word but it’s clear she’s not okay. “Can you excuse me for a minute?”
“Anyway,” Summer looks at me. “As I was saying, it’s a coincidence…my mom and I are both allergic to poultry too. What are the odds?” The chirpy goth unicorn girl smiles on a shrug, then passes me a bowl of salad.
Her sudden departure does nothing to dampen everyone else’s mood, so I take scoops of the green beans and a large serving of salad to start. As we eat, Margaret returns, but she’s quiet and keeps glancing my way when she thinks I’m not looking.
“I’m so full.” I finally put my fork down as Merrick and his parents have a heated debate about the latest need for a new stop light a few blocks up Main Street.
“Where’s the rest room?” I lean over, whispering to Summer, who points to the back left corner of the now-packed diner.
Merrick grabs a handful of my rear end as I stand and I turn red, looking around the table, but no one seems to care. “Kiss me first.”
“Do you hear everything?”
“Yes. Now kiss me.”
I lean down and do as he says, my heart feeling as full as my belly as I work my way through the crowded diner. Everyone eats and laughs, and this is the world I was never a part of before, but finally, I have hope.
I feel a part of it, like it’s a life I deserve and a confidence builds in me that the dreams I never dared to dream, maybe will come true.