Chapter 1 #4
He’d not been tempted by even the possibility in so long, but then he couldn’t remember the last time someone had seen so much of him, so easily. Everyone else was usually fooled by the shiny, pretty exterior and the deft way Ramsey always turned the tables.
But Nate hadn’t been, and he wasn’t looking for Ramsey to do anything right now either.
His fingers tightened around Ramsey’s upper thigh, the muscle flexing before Ramsey could stop it.
“Let me,” Nate asked, glancing up. He was beautiful too, in this light. Dark eyes, dark hair, scruff edging the intriguing planes of his face.
Ramsey nodded.
Nate pulled his briefs off, and Ramsey tried to bury the shocked gasp as his mouth closed over him, hot and wet and perfect.
Over the years, he’d had a lot of exceptional and even wild sex.
A simple blowjob shouldn’t unwind him like this, but there was something about the way Nate sucked him tenderly but insistently. The curl of his hand around his thigh. His touch soft but sure. Like he wasn’t trying to prove anything, he just wanted to give Ramsey pleasure.
Most guys tried to overdo it. Tried to win the sex Olympics. But Nate kept it simple and Ramsey found himself sinking into the comfortable mattress, his mind unraveling from its normal machinations. Able to just relax and enjoy it.
“So good,” he murmured, reaching down, keeping his touch equally soft. Tangling his fingers in Nate’s short hair.
Nate pulled off, the head of Ramsey’s cock still leaking against his tongue. “You want more?”
Not, I want more. Not, I’m gonna take more. But, asking, you want more? Like whatever answer Ramsey gave would be enough for him.
Men always grasped at him with claws. Like they could outthink and outmaneuver him into staying trapped in their cage. But Ramsey already knew that wasn’t Nate.
He offered his hand and didn’t snap it closed the moment Ramsey sighed and said, “Yeah.”
He just gave him more. More of that soft drugging pleasure, fizzing along his nerve endings. The callouses on his fingertips teasing his balls. A slick finger sliding back, pressing into his hole.
It wasn’t a new act, but it felt so different.
Before, it was always him on the receiving end of the begging pleas, but tonight, Ramsey barely even noticed that it was him doing it.
Not until Nate laughed roughly. “You sound so good. As good as I imagined.”
Ramsey hadn’t even realized he’d said anything. Had only been conscious of two fingers deep inside, stretching him out, Nate’s tongue teasing his cock.
“Did you?”
“Imagine? Oh yeah.”
Ramsey gasped as Nate’s fingers hit a particularly good spot and then he kept them there, not grinding but caressing. Soft, but inexorable. He squeezed his eyes shut, wanting more, but suddenly, inexplicably afraid of it.
Maybe when Nate finally slid inside him, his dick wet for the first time tonight, everything would change.
He’d become like everyone else.
“Thought about you just like this. Knew you’d feel this good, look this good.”
“Not on your dick?” Ramsey choked on his next breath.
“Oh, we’re getting there,” Nate said.
Burying his head into his bicep, Ramsey squeezed his eyes. Trying to get ahold of himself. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this pulled apart during sex.
Even the first time he’d been fucked, he’d been in control the whole time. The guy hadn’t even known it was Ramsey’s first time, because he’d made damn sure that he didn’t.
Sometimes guys wanted control. Ramsey gave it to them, but made sure they knew, too, every step of the way, that it was Ramsey choosing to concede it. And none of those guys ever treated the control as carefully as Nate did.
Not like Ramsey would break without the softness, but like he deserved something tender.
Nate fit a third finger inside of him, his movements deliberate and slow, but purposeful.
Ramsey panted into his bare arm. “I’m good, I’m good,” he muttered. Closer to the edge than he wanted to admit to.
Nate still took his time. Didn’t rush. Didn’t push. Stripped his clothes off, and even though Ramsey could see his fingers weren’t steady, didn’t immediately go for the condom. Stronger men hadn’t been able to resist Ramsey practically mewling to be fucked now.
Instead, he leaned in and kissed him again. It was hot—a kiss with this guy couldn’t be anything but, and Ramsey was going a little insane with how much he craved him inside—but it was more too.
Something else, pressing up against the inevitable arousal.
Ramsey pushed it aside, digging his fingertips into Nate’s shoulders and pulling him in with the strength of his legs. “Get in me,” he begged against Nate’s lips.
“Want you,” Nate echoed, despite that Ramsey hadn’t put that thought into words. Not exactly. Not the way Nate had.
Ramsey didn’t care. He just wanted it. Wanted Nate closer, even if it fucked him up later.
But it won’t. You won’t let it. You never let it.
That was true. Even now, there was a part, shining diamond hard, inside of him, that no matter how deeply Nate buried his cock, he’d never reach.
Ramsey held on to it, even as Nate slid inside.
He was big and hard, and it felt like he kept coming and coming, gentle but unyielding.
“Fuck,” Ramsey muttered. It had been too long. That was the reason why his throat kept closing every time Nate leaned in to kiss him.
He’d been a little afraid that when it came down to the moment, Nate would be too sweet about it. When Ramsey wanted fucked, he wanted to feel it, and to Ramsey’s surprise, he didn’t have to say a word.
Nate set a brisk pace, grinding into him, fingers clenched tightly around Ramsey’s thigh, fucking him deep and sure. Hitting all the good spots, his abs rubbing up against the head of Ramsey’s cock.
He’d been close before Nate even got in him—not that he’d have ever confessed that.
It felt like exposing himself, like he couldn’t control himself the way he’d expect.
But it didn’t take long for Nate to peel away the rest of his self-control, even as Ramsey tried desperately to dig his nails into it.
“Fuck, fuck,” Ramsey panted as Nate hit a particularly exquisite angle. “God—right there.”
“Oh yeah, I wanna feel you,” Nate groaned.
Nate’s thrusts were beginning to get more erratic, his breathing labored, and Ramsey decided he should come soon, too.
But before he could push himself over the edge, Nate leaned in, thrusting harder right on that angle, and Ramsey fell apart, the orgasm practically dragged out of him.
Nate’s head collapsed onto his shoulder, mouthing at the bare skin there, and Ramsey felt rather than heard the moan deep in his chest as he followed.
For a breathlessly long moment, Ramsey just lay there. God, he’d done this before. He knew how to do this. Gently push Nate off. Get up. Clean up. Get out.
But he was so tired. He didn’t want to. Nate was a heavy and warm but ultimately reassuring weight on top of him. Normally that would make Ramsey feel hemmed in. Controlled in a way he hated. In a way he always tried to avoid.
But not right now.
Now, he didn’t feel caged, but cherished.
“Better than I imagined,” Nate murmured into his ear. “Good for you too?”
There was a sudden urge for Ramsey to laugh hysterically. To ask, actually out loud, if maybe it would have felt like this if he’d ever gotten Wes and Marcus into bed.
But he hadn’t, and so he hadn’t known sex could feel like this.
He didn’t feel that different. He was still Ramsey Andresen. Still a professional hockey player, even if he wasn’t getting on the ice. Still had the headaches. Still knew how to weave a better web than anyone else he’d ever met. But Nate made him feel softer, too.
Something had eased inside Ramsey that had always felt tight before now.
“Yeah,” Ramsey agreed.
This was probably the moment Nate was going to get up. Clean him up. Want to cuddle. Hope, despite everything that Ramsey had said before he’d gone home with him, that Ramsey might be amenable to another night. To putting his phone number in Nate’s phone.
There was still that diamond bright, hard as nails center to him. He could reach for that. Use it to get him out of here. He’d done it so many times before in a way that had always felt natural and as easy as breathing.
But he didn’t want to. Not tonight.
“You want something to drink? A shower?”
Ramsey’s mouth was dry. He wasn’t sure he could tolerate a shower—because undoubtedly Nate would want to be up in his space, and that felt like a step too far—but he wouldn’t mind a drink.
Sharing a drink in Nate’s kitchen or his living room wasn’t cuddling, but it wasn’t leaving either.
It occurred to Ramsey then that part of Nate seeing through him so well was this. Nate anticipating Ramsey’s moves and circumventing them.
And even more interestingly, Ramsey not instantly feeling the need to counter.
“Yeah, a drink,” Ramsey said.
Nate pressed one last kiss to Ramsey’s shoulder and pulled away.
Ramsey got his first good look at Nate’s body then, and it was every bit as incredible and powerful as he’d hoped. He’d spent a lot of time in locker rooms and wasn’t a stranger to built guys, but this was different.
When Nate returned a moment later, he had a damp washcloth in his hand and he handed it over to Ramsey. Like he knew that too was a step too far.
Ramsey cleaned up, and pulled on his briefs and jeans again, but didn’t bother fastening them or putting his shirt back on.
He didn’t miss Nate’s approving glance either as he tugged on a pair of sweatpants from a drawer in the dresser opposite the bed and then led him into the kitchen.
“Beer? Water? Gatorade? Something stronger?” Nate asked, flicking the kitchen light on as he headed towards the fridge.
If Ramsey’s mouth had been dry before, it turned into the fucking Sahara Desert now.
Because the kitchen and the living room were really one big space, taking up the lion’s share of the apartment and now that the light was on, Ramsey could see why he owned this place. Why he wore the Rolex on his wrist.