Chapter 22 - Jillian
"Nina, I've got to go." I tossed my purse into my car and slammed the door as I pushed the keys into the keyhole, starting the car up.
"What do you mean you have to go?"
"I'm meeting the girls for lunch and I'm already running a little late."
I could hear Nina whine at the other end. "Who exactly are the girls you're having lunch with? I don't recall getting an invitation."
I chuckled. "It's just with the witches. Don't get your panties into a twist."
She grunted on the other end. "Okay, fine. But you'd better call me when you're free."
I chuckled, nodding my head. "Okay, I will. I'll talk to you later."
I ended the call and pulled the car out of the driveway. I smiled as I drove, thinking about how much life had changed when I moved here. I couldn't help but feel like things were great, better than I could have ever imagined.
I never would have thought that I would be married to Maddox and be happy about it. I loved my job, even though I was just starting out. The group I was working with was amazing, and they loved every idea I came up with.
I had great friends and was starting to feel settled in this town. I missed Frank's pack, but I had a good system in this new one.
I pulled up in front of the restaurant and found Hope, Tara, and Jessie already sitting at a table. Hope waved, and I headed inside. The restaurant was packed with people at every table, and live music was playing from the front stage. The girls waved me over, already having a drink in each hand.
"Hey! We ordered you a raspberry lemonade since we know you like those."
I smiled as I slid into my chair, taking a deep sip of my drink. "So, what are we talking about?"
Tara wiggled her eyebrow. "We were just talking about sex, our favorite positions."
Jessie snorted. "We were not! We were talking about taking a trip, and Tara. Jessie slid her a look. "Brought up that she was pretty sure she was growing her cherry back because she hasn't been laid in a year."
I choked on my drink, and Hope started to laugh next to me. I grabbed for a napkin, looking at Jessie and then at Tara. "Oh my god, Jesus…I don't even know what to say to that?"
Hope laughed. "That's what we've been discussing."
"You're married and having sex. Tell us about it," Jessie said, leaning onto the counter. "Let me live through you."
My mind traveled to the mountain and the sex Maddox and I had there. I thought of how free I felt in his hands, how loved I felt. I had never had such a powerful orgasm before Maddox came along. My release was just as important as his.
I blushed thinking about how many positions we'd been in. My silence made the girls learn closer. "Oh my god! You're blushing."
I quickly snapped back to it and shook my head. “I uh…we…”
"Oh my god!" Tara squealed. "You must have hot sex for your face to look like that."
I felt my blush deepen, and Hope elbowed me softly. "You are pretty red."
"I just… I..." I stumbled for words. "We…I... I'm not telling you about our sex."
"I'm a little interested now," Hope said with a chuckle. "Must be hot to be stammering like that."
They all started to chuckle, and I sipped my drink. "Can we move off the sex topic?"
"Okay, but one last question, and then we will. Please tell us he knows what he's doing. Like, he gets how the plumbing works."
I looked at each of them and paused before I smirked. "Yes, he knows how the plumbing works."
They all squealed, and I couldn't help but laugh. I sipped on my drink as we moved the conversation to what they had all been busy doing. Hope had been busy helping Katie with some things. Tara and Jessie were busy gathering things in the forest to keep up on their supply of herbal medicines.
"We actually have to go out again tomorrow," Tara said.
"Wait, I thought you guys were going with me tomorrow to Jay's pack? We have a day full of patients."
"Shit, is that tomorrow?" Jessie asked. "The days are blurring together."
"Well, maybe I can go for you guys," I added, wanting to be helpful.
"We couldn't ask that of you," Tara said. "You have a job, and I'm sure you're busy."
"I have plenty of time. I can go in the morning before my shift. Let me do it for you guys. You have all been so helpful. Let me at least try to return the favor."
Hope smiled at me. "Jillian, we have helped you because we are your friends and we understand what it's like to struggle. You don't owe us anything."
"Well, then let me do this as a friend," I said, giving them all a smile. "Please. Besides, I'll be good at it since I'm accustomed to plants. You guys are going to be too busy tomorrow to even think about it."
Jessie looked at Hope. "We do need the herbs. It's not a bad idea."
"You're sure that this isn't going to get in the way of your day tomorrow?" Hope asked. "I don't want to take up time if you have too much to do."
I shook my head. "No. I'll go in the morning before work. We are having plants delivered at the roundabout near the grocery store, but their load doesn't get in until eight, so we won't get it until maybe nine."
"Well, thank you for what you picked for us. It's a big help."
I smiled suddenly, eager to get back out into the woods. I knew I would do a good job since I grew up around someone who knew every plant like the back of her hand.
I arrived home and set my purse down on the side table by the front door. I found Maddox sitting on the recliner. The TV was on, playing a movie, and the room's lights were dimmed.
I walked over and found Maddox asleep. He had a blanket half thrown over himself, his phone was sitting on the arm of the chair, and he had a soda to the right of him. I looked at the time, seeing it was only a little past six.
I reached out, brushing at his hair. I knew that he'd been getting up early and working. He worked hard to make things better for the pack. Even with how busy he was, he still thought about me. I got phone calls and text messages throughout the day.
I had told him I would be out for dinner, but if I hadn't, he would have left a plate out for me, or he'd be cooking dinner.
I reached my hand lower, rubbing my hand over his cheek. I felt my heart skip a beat knowing that I had fallen for him. I loved Maddox so deeply it hurt.
Maddox leaned into my hand and softly sighed. He shifted slightly and his eyes opened slowly. He blinked a few times before looking confused. "What time is it?"
"A little past six," I said, pulling my hand back. "Why don't you go up to bed?"
He sat up slowly and reached for his phone. He rubbed at his eyes. "I should get on my computer. I have some reports to look over."
"Or, you could go to bed and get the sleep your body clearly needs."
Maddox looked at me and then reached a hand out, yanking me onto his lap. He cradled me, kissing my forehead. A small giggle slipped out, and he pulled me tighter. "How was your day?"
"It was good," I said, circling into him. "I had a good day. And tomorrow I get to go pick herbs for the heals."
He raised an eyebrow at me. "That's fun?"
I nodded. "Very much so."
He clicked his tongue and pressed a soft kiss to my lips. I leaned into it, suddenly wanting more of him. But he broke the kiss to yawn, and I knew he needed sleep.
I smiled at him softly. "You need sleep."
He pulled me close. "But I want to be with you."
"I'll come to bed," I offered, knowing I was tired myself anyway. I had spent the morning going over a budget for what we could spend and deciding what to order for some other projects we were going to be working on. My brain was fried after everything.
Maddox pulled us both up and started to carry me up the stairs. I chuckled. "I can walk."
"I know," he said, giving me a flashy smile. "But I like carrying you."
He took us to our bedroom and set me on the bed. He set his alarm for the next morning before crawling under the sheets. He pulled me close to him and nuzzled his head into my neck.
"Tired?" I asked, running my hands through his hair.
He nodded, and I could feel him sinking into the pillow. I smiled, setting my own alarm. I flipped through my phone for a little bit before I could feel his breath growing slower, telling me he was sleeping.
I set my phone aside and curled close to him. His heat radiated through the bed, warming me. I smiled, closing my eyes, allowing sleep to hit me.
I woke the next morning to the sun coming in through the window. I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I found Maddox already dressed as he stepped into the room. He smiled at me. "Morning, dear."
I grumbled, pulling the pillow closer. Maddox laughed. "Still not a morning person, I see."
"I need coffee," I said.
"I know, which is why there is coffee brewing downstairs for you. I have to head out. Let me know if there is anything you need."
I nodded, peaking out at him from the pillow.
Maddox looked perfect, and I felt my heart skip a beat.
The words suddenly bubbled to the surface, but I didn't say them.
How could I? I knew that things were going well, amazing actually.
But how could I admit to loving him when this was all so fresh?
We'd only been living together for a couple of months.
"Something wrong?" Maddox asked, tilting his head as he gave me a look.
I shook my head. "Nope. Have a good day."
He smiled, seeming ready to say something himself, but paused. "You as well."
He turned, slipping back into the hallway, and I grumbled as I sank back into the pillow. I groaned, wishing I could just admit my feelings. Why was it so hard for me?
After sitting in my own pity for twenty minutes, I finally got up. I got dressed in some ratty clothes. I didn't mind getting dirty, so I pulled my hair up into a messy bun. I went downstairs and made myself a cup of coffee.
I glanced through the list of herbs that Hope sent me that the healers needed. I made a mental check, knowing where each would grow and just how far I would have to go into the woods to gather it.
I packed up a couple of empty bags and made my way to the car. I drove near a park that was near the woods, which would have better options for picking. I headed inside and felt a skip in my step.
I inhaled the air, knowing it had rained a little last night. The ground was a little wet, and water dripped off the leaves. The wind blew softly, and I felt more relaxed as I walked.
I found some wood sage and packed it into the bag. I found some lavender as I walked, packing it carefully into my bag. I wander the woods, taking in all the trees and the sound of the river that runs through them.
I could hear birds chirping and bugs buzzing. It was wonderful, and I closed my eyes, taking it in.
" Jillian .” A voice said, drawing my name out.
My body tensed up, and I frowned. I looked over my shoulder and frowned. Surely, I was hearing things.
" Jilli a n …"
I scowled, narrowing my eyes at a large tree to the left of me. I knew that it was likely the guys from before who were screwing with me again. It only angered me.
"It's not funny," I snapped and started walking towards the tree. "It just makes you an ass."
I rounded the tree expecting to find them, but there was no one. I heard no footsteps, no movement, meaning I was alone.
Was I hearing things? I couldn't be. I was wearing the bracelets, and they wouldn't allow me to use magic, and in turn, no magic could touch me. That was what the Council said.
I swallowed, biting my cheek tightly.
Don't panic. Panicking only makes everything worse.
"Jillian…you can't run from me." The voice was closer, louder this time. I could hear the shift and the irritation in the tone. What I hated most was that I knew that voice.
I stopped breathing, and my entire body went still like a statue. I stared deep into the woods, expecting him to emerge.
"You think those little things are going to save you?" The bracelets moved, turning slightly to the left and then to the right. I felt like there were hands on me, but there wasn't. I was alone.
And suddenly the bracelets shattered. The beads burst apart, and the wire holding them together fell to the ground. I inhaled slowly as I heard him louder now, echoing around my mind.
"You can't run from what is expected of you. You will turn against the person you love so dearly."
I shook my head. "No.." My words came out in a whisper.
I could hear him chuckle. "It wasn't a request."
My body turned slightly, and I jerked back at the motion. It was like someone pushed me in the back, and I hated it. I knew this feeling. I knew it all too well.
I shook my head, digging my nails into the dirt. " No . You can't make me do anything."
"It will only hurt the more you pull against me, Jillian. Just accept your fate."
I felt tears bloom, hating how he was pushing anger onto me. I could feel his rage like it was my own, and I hated it. This wasn't me. This wasn't who I wanted to be.
I shook my head, feeling my entire body shaking, trying to fight against the pull to get up. If I went back, I knew what would happen. I couldn't relive everything I'd done for a second time, and I would never be able to forgive myself if I did something to Maddox.
I loved him. I knew his dark secrets and his fears. I knew what he loved and what he hated. I just got him to believe me and to side with me. If I came at him now, he would never forgive me.
My arms shook as I pulled myself up. My legs fought as I took a step forward. I ground my teeth together and turned to head deeper into the forest. Running was my escape.
I could hear him getting frustrated, hating that I wasn't going as willingly as I had last time. But I wasn't the same person I was before. I was stronger. At least, I was hoping I was.