Chapter 106

I’m smiling wider than ever as we step into Declan’s party, spotting a lot of familiar faces from Labor Day weekend.

“Shut up!” I yell, seeing Declan. “Okay, Rick Owens goes to Burning Man. I see we are all going to the same apocalypse,” I say, examining his costume that is like Mad Max and Dune vibes.

Then I see Lauren dressed as a sexy alien, grabbing for his hand. It’s like a scene from a movie where the noise of the crowd goes silent. My smile fades.

“You remember Lauren.” I force a smile. I’ve never wanted a drink so badly in my fucking life.

“I have to pee,” I say, walking fast to the bathroom. Slamming the door, I lock it and start crying. Why the fuck am I crying? I take deep breath after deep breath. Why am I so fucking upset that Declan is with her?

There’s a knock at the door. “Baby,” G calls out. I dab my face with the toilet paper. “Get your shit together!” I mutter to myself, then open the door.

“What’s going on?”

“I’m not feeling good,” I lie. It’s the first time I’ve lied to him in a long time.

“Is it the shots?”

“Maybe,” I lie again.

“Only three more days, and then you’re done.” He squeezes my shoulder.

I shouldn’t drink to numb how I feel, and I shouldn’t drink because my egg retrieval is in a couple of days.

“I’m happy you are doing this for yourself,” he encourages.

He loves me so much. He is the best boyfriend on the planet. Why am I having such a visceral reaction to seeing Declan with another girl?

“How about we go home?” he asks.

I nod. “Let’s just go. No goodbyes.”

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