Chapter Five #3
Three hours later Bella was downstairs in the kitchen.
She’d fallen into an exhausted sleep and now she was wide-awake and jittery, Amy’s call a few hours ago having thrown her into a tizzy.
The best way to remedy her anxiety was to dive right into work.
When she was cooking and planning out new recipes, she’d get caught up in the moment and forget her troubles.
From the refrigerator, she grabbed a big loaf of sourdough bread, two cheeses, a slab of bacon, a slice of thick ham and a carton of eggs. She was grateful Marie had stocked up on the groceries she’d requested the other day. She had plenty to work with now.
She buttered a casserole dish and then, wielding her new chef’s knife, began cutting off the crust on six slices of bread.
At the sound of footsteps approaching, she lifted her head, and her stomach did a little flip as Jared walked into the kitchen.
He was rubbing his head, making chunks of his blond hair stick up at odd angles.
His mussed, drowsy-eyed look did a number on her already raw nerves.
“Hey,” he said quietly. “Didn’t think you’d be up tonight. You seemed pretty tired after dinner last night.”
After she’d served dessert and said goodbye to Cooper and Lauren, she’d dashed upstairs with Sienna. That kiss, though chaste, combined with Jared’s compliments, had ignited something in her that could spell trouble. And she had more than enough trouble right now.
“I was. But my body clock said it was time to get up and so here I am. How about you?”
“Same old. Can’t seem to get comfortable in bed.” He glanced at her workstation. “What are you making tonight?”
“Your breakfast.”
“Really? What is it?”
“Kind of a cheesy egg soufflé. It’s really rich, but I’m trying to cut down on the fat content.”
“With bacon and ham? Sounds like my kind of dish.”
“Hold on, buster, I’m not putting all of this into the dish. Bacon and ham will be added for flavor. And I’m going to cut the eggs down to three whites and three whole eggs.”
“Okay, so burst my bubble. Want some milk?” he asked, heading to the refrigerator.
She shook her head. “No, but please leave it out. I need some for the recipe.”
Jared poured himself a tall glass of milk and then took a seat across from her at the workstation to watch her. It was getting to be a thing, these after-midnight meetings.
He sat quietly for a while, sipping his drink. She was fully aware of his eyes on her. “Am I disturbing your quiet?” he asked.
As in, was his presence here making her nervous? Heck yes. But she didn’t mind him being here. He was a nice diversion after that disturbing phone call from Amy.
“Actually, if I’m totally honest, I don’t mind. Sienna is always interrupting my thoughts and I love her beyond belief, but sometimes it’s nice to be able to have a conversation without being disturbed.”
“I get that. You can turn off being Mommy for a little while.”
“Something like that.”
“You know, Cooper and Lauren were impressed with you,” he said. “And Lauren’s amazed at how you keep it all together, work and baby and single parenthood.”
She kept her eyes on her task. Was she keeping it all together? She was on the run, trying to protect her baby and lying through her teeth to some very decent people about who she really was.
During dessert, she and Lauren had had a long talk about babies and pregnancy, and she’d shared with her a little about her life with Paul. But she’d had to omit so much from that conversation to keep her identity a secret.
“To tell you the truth, you impress me, too,” Jared said.
She shrugged. Normally, Jared’s compliment would have gone to her head, but tonight she was trying to keep things real.
And nothing was more real than learning her father may have sent his henchmen out to find her.
“I’m doing what I have to do. Sienna’s the most important thing in my life.
And as you can see, I can survive on very little sleep, so I have that over other women. I have a few more hours in my day.”
“I guess so,” he said, polishing off his milk and setting the glass down with a soft thud. “Can I help with anything?”
He was a gorgeous hunk of a man—how could she not notice?
—but that wasn’t why she was drawn to him.
The bond of her saving his life would always be there, but more than anything she truly liked him and enjoyed talking to him.
He was easy and nice and...well, she needed a friend so badly right now. “Can you cut up bacon and ham?”
“I can do that.”
He came around the granite counter and she handed him a knife. “Just call me your sous chef.”
“Do I have to?”
He laughed and it was the first time she’d seen him laugh without visible pain. It soothed her heart to witness him healing. “Yes.”
“Okay, if you say so. You’re the boss.”
“Not in the kitchen, I’m not.” Jared smiled. “You’re in charge in here. From now on, I’m gonna call you the Midnight Contessa.”
Contessa? She actually liked the sound of it. Deliberately, she hadn’t made reference to her Italian heritage to Jared, and it was just one more thing she felt guilty about. But the name had a nice ring.
“Feel free to use it as the title of your cookbook.”
She could only return half a smile tonight. He had more faith in her than she had in herself. The cookbook and her dream of opening a restaurant had been put on hold indefinitely. She couldn’t think that far into the future. She had to take one day at a time right now.
She hoped Jared didn’t notice her anxiety. It would only lead to questions that she couldn’t answer.
“Maybe someday, Jared.”
They worked together, cooking up the diced bacon and ham, lining the casserole dish with bread and then adding the rest of ingredients. When it was all assembled, she put the dish into the oven and set the timer.
“What now?” he asked.
“Now I clean up the kitchen and wait. But you don’t have to, if you’d rather try going back to sleep.”
“Not on your life. This is my first sous chef creation.”
“It’ll take at least half an hour.”
“Hey, I have an idea. Wait right here.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” she said, dumbfounded. “I’ll just start cleaning.”
But Jared was already out of the room. Not three minutes later he came back holding a suede jacket and a plaid wool shirt.
“What’s all this?”
“We need some fresh air.” He picked up the baby monitor and then grabbed Bella’s hand and tugged her to the French door leading out to the large stone patio area. “Here, put this on,” he said, handing her the suede jacket.
He left her to fiddle with knobs and buttons on a fire pit and the next thing she knew, she was sitting on a comfy outdoor sofa in front of a blazing fire. Jared sat beside her and warmth surrounded them.
“I haven’t come out here in a long while,” he said. “I’ve forgotten how beautiful the stars were. Look at that sky, Bella.”
She glanced skyward. “It is quite amazing. So why haven’t you come out here? Is it because of your injuries?”
“No, happened way before that. It used to remind me of...never mind.”
“What?” she asked softly. “What did it remind you of?” She was really curious. Jared usually didn’t speak much about himself and she was eager to learn more about him.
“Just a girl I once...cared for.”
“Oh, so you would come out here with her?”
“Yeah, and we’d talk for hours about our future.”
“I take it it didn’t work out.”
“No, it didn’t.”
“I’m sorry, Jared.”
He took his eyes off the stars to glance at her. “I’m over it. Just kicking myself for being stupid.”
“I doubt you were ever stupid.”
He scratched his head. “No, I was. I trusted her, believed in her, even when I should’ve been more wary. Things weren’t adding up and I was too damn blind to see it. She lied to me over and over, and it was her betrayal that really did a number on me.”
Bella shivered. She could put herself into that equation and the results would be the same. Lies and betrayal and abuse of his trust.
“Hey, you’re trembling.” Jared rose and sifted through a patio box, coming up with a soft gray woolen blanket. He sat beside her and tucked her into the blanket. “Sorry, didn’t realize you were cold.”
“I...shouldn’t be.” Her trembling had nothing to do with the temperature.
“Better now?” he asked, his eyes filled with genuine concern.
“Much.”
Satisfied, he leaned back and put his arm around her. Cushioned by his warmth, she gazed at a sky full of twinkling specks of light. She sighed and her guilt about lying to Jared was immediately replaced by a soothing calm. “Thank you for bringing me out here tonight. It’s just what I needed.”
“Welcome,” he said, smiling. He seemed pleased that he’d pleased her. A girl could let that go to her head. “You seemed a little... I don’t know, sad? Or upset. I thought the fresh air and bright stars might brighten your mood.”
He’d picked up on her anxiety? Here she’d thought she’d covered it so well.
“I’m...okay, Jared. Some days are more difficult than others.”
“I get how hard this is for you. You being a widow and all,” he said ultra quietly, as if the word would somehow set off a whirlwind of emotion. “And if you ever need anything, I’m here, Bella. All you have to do is ask.”
She turned her body slightly, looking him in the eyes. She lifted her hand to his cheek and the fine stubble tickled her fingertips. “Thank you.”
She leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek.
And then he turned toward her and their mouths brushed, a gentle, tender caress that felt as natural as the sun shining.
His lips were warm and firm and she waited for guilt to summon her, for a backlash of forbidden emotion to warn her off, but none of that happened.
Instead she relished the kiss, savored the taste of him, enjoyed the sweeping sensations her body was experiencing.
She’d been wound tight lately and Jared coming to her rescue tonight soothed her nerves. And now kissing him was...well, putting only wonderful thoughts in her head.