Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
MARLOW
“Go ahead, girls; I’ll catch up with you in a bit.”
My cheer mates give me sympathetic smiles, hand squeezes on my shoulders, and variations of ‘Hope you feel better soon’ as they file out of the girls’ locker room to go set up on the field.
The game isn’t for another ninety minutes and regardless of how I’m feeling, the show must go on. Meaning, I have to be out there since I’m the captain.
Even though my insides feel like they’re shrivelling up and dying.
I fake a smile I don’t feel and drop it the second my last peer leaves.
Lowering myself onto the wooden bench facing the locker, I close my eyes and try counting my breaths, but even that doesn’t help lessen the ache within.
Once Thane and I went our separate ways last night, I changed my clothes, wrote Michaela a note, placed it on her desk for when she returned home from the party, and grabbed my bags.
I hailed a cab and found myself a cheap room in a motel.
Different from the one Thane and I stayed in, of course.
I didn’t think I could sleep in the same place where we fucked each other when my wound was still so raw.
Michaela must have read the note by now. I wonder if she was mad at me. If she was, I hope we could rebuild your relationship anew after this.
For now, I’m going to direct all my energy towards my current plan: moving on from Thane. It won’t be easy. Especially since he’ll be on the field for today’s game.
My shoulders sag.
Whatever. I won’t let my eyes stray towards him and pretend like he doesn’t exist.
A small voice in my head says that isn’t possible.
Thane will always exist to me. He can’t be ignored.
But it’s okay. I’m a big girl. I know how to patch up a broken heart. Moreover, I’ve lived my whole life being unwanted. One man not reciprocating the depth of my feelings won’t kill me. It’ll just be another scar on my soul that heals with time.
A couple years from now, maybe I won’t hurt or feel embarrassed about wanting someone who didn’t want me the way I wanted him.
At least I had one night with him. I won’t have to wonder about the what ifs anymore. It happened and I’m still happy, even though I crashed and burned at the end of it.
I give myself another moment to wallow in my self-pity before shifting into game mode. I need to help my girls set up the field. Need to go through a routine. Need to put on a happy mask for an entire crowd. None of that will happen if I keep feeling sorry for myself.
Just as I get up from the bench and head towards the locker room door, I hear jangling on the other side before it whips open and a big body enters.
Thane.
His hair is mussed, like he’s run his fingers through it multiple times, his black t-shirt is a touch askew, and he’s got dark circles under his eyes.
He’s still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen and I hate him a little for making me fall this deeply for him.
My breath catches in my throat and it feels like all the air has been sucked out of the room.
Instead of asking him why he’s in the girls’ locker room, I accidentally blurt out, “Why are you holding a bouquet of peonies?”
Instead of replying to my question, his green eyes burn as they peruse me from top to bottom, like he’s missed me. No, that can’t be right.
“Is it only you here?” he asks.
I nod, apprehension trickling through me.
Thane grimaces and shuts the door behind him, locking it for good measure.
I swallow. “Why did you do that?”
“These flowers are for you,” he finally answers, advancing towards me.
Instinctively, I back up until I’m pressed against the row of lockers.
My heart that’s been broken and bruised is beating again now that Thane is here.
He’s here and he bought me flowers. “And I locked the door, because I need to be alone with you to have this conversation.”
I gulp. “And what conversation is that?”
Without breaking my gaze, he places the bouquet on the wooden bench.
Along with a mug.
Oh.
My mug.
The one I painted at the ceramic café which feels like light years ago.
Then I blush when I realize he’s seen it all. The depiction of him standing right next to me on the field.
Based on the way he’s gazing at me, he knows how whipped I am.
Thane gingerly reaches his hands out to cup my face, hesitating the barest second like I’ll flinch away from his touch. He brings his forehead down to mine and my body melts with relief. My own hands rise to cover his.
“After last night, it’s clear that my communication needs work,” Thane whispers. “It’s never been my strong suit, but knowing that we left that motel room with you thinking that I was done with you? Baby, I’ll never forgive myself.”
My inhale is shaky, my eyes wide as I stare into his green ones. “W-What?”
“When I said that we crossed a line, I didn’t mean that I regretted it.
Far from it. I can never regret a second spent in your presence when I feel this way about you—when I’ve wanted you for so long, Marlow.
” Thane’s lips brush mine as he speaks. “And when I said I needed to do the right thing, I meant telling Michaela the truth about us. In no way did I mean that I wanted things between us to end before they even began. The ride back home, I kept beating myself up that I did something wrong when all I wanted was to make you happy, keep you close, and be with you in a way I’ve never been with anyone else.
I’ve fallen for you, Marlow, and if you don’t give me a chance to show you what a good boyfriend I can be, I… I don’t think I’ll ever recover.”
Oh, God.
I can’t believe it.
All this time, I thought he didn’t want me beyond one night. Turns out he does and he came all the way here just to tell me.
“Please, Marlow,” Thane’s pained plea fans over my parted lips. “I’m begging you. Just let me be yours. Let me keep you. Let me show you how good it can be between us.”
“You really want this—me?” I ask softly.
“Yes,” he grates. “And it kills me that I made you second-guess it.” His lips move to my right eyelid.
He presses a kiss. “I want you, Marlow.” Moves to the other eyelid and presses another kiss.
“And I know this might feel fast, but I love you.” I gasp and he presses a kiss to the apple of my left cheek.
“I think I fell a little in love the first time I saw you on the field months ago, looking like a ray of sunshine.” A kiss to the other cheek.
“I think I was halfway in love the night of the solarium, when you consoled me.” Finally, a kiss to my lips.
“And I fell completely after we made love in the motel room.”
I feel like I’m having an out-of-body experience.
I’m wanted. I’m loved. By Thane, my coach crush.
Every one of my nerve endings lights up with so much adoration for him.
“I love you too, Thane,” I say, my voice thick with emotions and he appears taken aback, like he didn’t think I could return his feelings.
“You can keep me. You can be mine. You can show me how good it can be between us.”
Thane wraps his arms around me in a crushing hug and kisses me with a fierce urgency that I match, passion exploding between us as our lips meet again and again and again.
“I-I’m sorry for leaving the way I did,” I say when we come up for air. “I should have stayed and talked to you some more. That way, I’d have known we were on the same page.”
“Fuck, baby, when Michaela showed me the note, I was so worried.” His eyes flash with misery. “I couldn’t believe you’d left in the middle of the night and stayed alone under a strange roof.”
“I’m so sorry.” I thumb his cheek and his clenched jaw relaxes under my touch. I kiss him again. “But all that’s in the past now. We can pick up where we left off.”
He licks his lips. “My plan this morning was to give you your flowers and mug, make you pancakes and coffee, and ask you to be my girlfriend. Then I was going to drive you to college and eat your pretty little cunt in my office before the game.”
“Oh. I like that plan.” Heat curls low in my belly and I feel breathless. “And though it may not have gone exactly how you wanted, we can still rectify it.”
Thane smirks. “And how should we do that, baby girl?”
Fuck, I’ve missed him calling me baby girl in that low, gravelly voice. I’m getting wetter by the second and he needs to clean up the mess he’s making.
“Well, for one, all my cheer mates are gone and you’ve barred me inside the locker room with you,” I say coyly. “I think we’ve got the perfect setting, don’t you?”
Thane’s already ahead of me, dropping to his knees and looking like a sex god as his hands travel up my bare thighs to the elastic of my uniform skirt. “You want me to fuck you before the game?”
He’s tearing my skirt off my legs and swinging my right leg over his broad shoulder. I’m trembling with anticipation. This is so hot and naughty and the fact that we can get caught spurs me on even more. “Yes.”
He spreads my pussy open with one hand, gazing hungrily at my clit. “We don’t have much time before we have to be out on the field, little cheerleader.”
I dive my fingers into his black hair and stare down at him, whimpering when the flat of his tongue licks along my swollen pussy. “T-Then you better make me come quick, Coach Thane.”
My boyfriend accepts the challenge with a devilish gleam in his eyes and gets to work. He makes me come with his tongue and then he fucks me senselessly against the row of lockers, all while whispering how much he loves me.