Chapter 6 LEENA
LEENA
The cool water washes over me, running over every part of my skin. Time seems to pass slowly as I stand there in the shower, trying not to overthink. All my mind has done is wander, and it's no different now.
I throw my head back a little, letting some of the water on my face. It refreshes me so much that I consider just staying in the bathroom forever.
Sadly, my conscience doesn't work that way. I'm already thinking about how much water I'm wasting, especially in a big house like this one, which needs to care for a bunch of people.
There's still a lot of exploring to do, but I'm not very motivated. What I am, though, is hungry. My stomach rumbles as I walk out of the shower, picking up the large towel laid out for me.
I pull the towel closer, a little bit taken aback by the sweet, flowery smell. “Wow, this smells nice.”
It feels like I'm in a hotel, but unlike most hotels, this isn't one I will be checking out of soon. It's hard to feel at home when you know you're different from everyone, even your kind.
I pat myself dry before finally walking out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. It's a really cozy space, and I'm happy that a lot of effort was put into it.
My stomach growls again, a bit angrier at me for forgetting that I need to eat. This constant appetite is another thing I'm not sure I'll ever be able to get used to.
When Grant mentioned running into the woods to transform, the running part sounded like a great idea, but the transforming part didn't really appeal to me.
I put on some of my old clothes, settling on some sweatpants with an old shirt with the logo of a band I can't recognize.
I step out of my bedroom, immediately hearing a voice that has become very familiar now. I'm not sure where Grant's room is, but his voice is definitely coming from the office next to me.
The voice suddenly stops, and so does my breathing. It seems like he's realized that I'm close, which freaks me out for some reason. I'd been hiding out in my room to avoid the man, and I'm not sure I'm ready to see him yet.
I turn in the other direction and head toward the stairs, choosing to satisfy my stomach over my curiosity. I reach the downstairs hall, but there seems to be no one else in the house. At least no one I can see.
They must all be in their rooms.
I casually enter the kitchen, feeling more comfortable here, seeing as it's one of the few rooms in the pack house that I know.
I sniff the air, scanning around for any meal that can help satisfy me. There's nothing in sight, which seems weird. In fact, the kitchen looks like it was just fully cleaned.
My stomach groans, propelling me toward the fridge. I open it to find a large roast chicken, just sitting pretty.
“Man, I'm so hungry.”
I rip off a thigh and devour the meat from the bone, not caring at all that it's cold. The chicken tastes like heaven in my mouth, making me moan softly from the meaty goodness.
I pull off the other thigh against my better judgment before making short work of that too.
My mind finally begins to calm down a little, which comes with some clarity. I glance down at my fingers, watching how my claws slowly retract.
What? When did they come out?
I slowly bring my hand to my face, sensing that my eyes have changed as well. So much for control.
“Okay,” I admit, “I've done enough damage here.” I close the door and jump when I see Molly standing behind it. “Jesus!”
She laughs. “Don't worry, you'll learn how to focus your senses so you don't get snuck up on like that.”
I look down at my greasy hands and sigh. It feels like I've literally been caught red-handed. The older woman sees this and goes to one of the tables to retrieve a paper towel. She gives it to me and I smile gratefully.
“Thank you. I'm sorry about the chicken.”
“What? Don't be. It's for you and Grant… although, I'm sure you would've enjoyed it more if it were warmer.”
“I'm glad I didn't know because I'm not sure I would have shared.”
She giggles, a sound that's both comforting and relaxing. “Then I'm glad you've got such a strong conscience, because I'm pretty sure Grant hasn't eaten a thing even though I've told him to do so over and over.”
So he really doesn't listen to anyone?
“It's this appetite,” I sigh, moving to a counter and leaning against it. “I don't know how to control it.”
Molly cocks her head to the side. “Have you ever met a bodybuilder before?”
“Huh?”
“You know, all those big muscly guys.”
“Yeah, I know. I'm just not sure why you're asking.”
“Well,” Molly rubs her hands together. “Those guys eat all the time. Their body has a lot of work to do, and they need fuel. Your metabolism is sort of like that, but so much faster. It doesn't help that all your senses are heightened too, and—” Molly pauses when she sees my sad expression.
The woman walks toward me, placing a hand on my shoulder. “My point is that this is normal. It may not seem like it, but there's nothing wrong with you. You're just hungry. That happens. Feeling bad about something as simple as eating isn't going to help with this journey.”
My shoulders relax. “Yeah… yeah, you're right. Thank you for talking to me and being so kind.”
“Did you think you'd be yelled at or something?” she asks, amused.
I shrug. “I didn't know what to expect.”
“I guess that's fair. We're a family here, we weren't joking about that. I want you to be as comfortable as possible. If you need anything, just let us know. Besides, you're basically our boss.”
“I don't know about that,” I say, letting the words draw out.
The woman waves her hands in front of me. “Oh, please, don't be modest. You're helping out the alpha, and you're doing a lot of supervision. Just because you need help with some things doesn't mean you don't have your work as well. Remember that, okay?”
I slowly nod. “Thank you so much, Molly. You don't know how much you've helped me today.”
She simply shrugs. “What sort of person would I be if I wasn't lending a hand?”
You'd be like most of the people I've met in my life.
Even now, I find it a little difficult to believe that Molly or anyone else has my best interests at heart. Thankfully, they're showing me that it may be okay to give a little trust.
Molly stifles a yawn before looking down. “Sorry the kitchen is so empty. The twins have gone into town to help restock. I told them to get groceries as well.”
“Oh, okay, that makes sense. I was wondering where everyone was.”
“They'll be back pretty late though,” she confesses. “If you're still hungry, please, help yourself to the chicken. Take as much as you like.”
My eyes almost bulge out of my head. “Really?” My mouth begins to water, forcing me to close it tightly and avoid embarrassment. “What about Grant? Definitely, the alpha should eat something.”
Since I met Grant, I've been drawn to him in a way that I'm sure isn't normal. It's like I’m being tugged toward the leader of the pack.
My mind reminds me that he's important and should be followed. Still, it's not an uncontrollable urge, but it's definitely there.
For Grant, I can tell that those he leads follow him fully out of loyalty. His pack doesn’t just follow him because he is the alpha—they want to.
It wasn't like that in my old pack. The alpha was just that; there was hardly any substance behind it.
“I have a feeling that Grant will be fine,” Molly assures me. “It's not the first time he's gone without eating. I'd be surprised if he actually came down and got something in his belly.” She finishes this with a familiar laugh.
Should I bring some food to him?
I'm not sure what my place is here, but hopefully I’ll figure it out soon. For now, I'm going to try not to overdo things. Molly leaves me alone with the chicken. I feel much less guilty now as I eat, but I still don't finish it all.
“No need to get greedy,” I sigh, placing the rest of the meat in the fridge. It's not a lot, but it's still enough for a good snack. There's a chance I'll come back tomorrow with the chicken still untouched.
I close the fridge door, letting out a satisfied breath and smile, my stomach now content. I stroll around the kitchen, perusing the numerous pots and pans and assorted cutlery.
After my curiosity has been satisfied, I head back upstairs. The day passes, and it's pretty late in the evening, making me wonder what the evening ritual is like in a place like this.
Do these people have dinner? Does everyone eat separately? Can anyone eat at any time—like I did?
I venture to the top of the stairs and stop, turning slowly toward the office. Even from many feet away, I can already hear Grant's voice.
My hearing is sharp enough that I can hear him without having to be so close to him. Still, I inch closer just out of habit. Grant's voice had been inaudible when I came down the stairs. Now, it's so stern, I'm almost too scared to eavesdrop. Almost.
After tiptoeing to the wood, I lightly press my ear against the door. “Can you give me a number?” Grant asks the person on the other end of the call. “How many are we dealing with here?”
What's he talking about?
“Okay, I guess that's fine… as far as good news goes. Two hunters are still quite the threat, though. That pack will need a new home after such devastation.”
My eyes widen when I hear him mention hunters. My only encounter with hunters is one I still think about to this day. The hate that they had used to speak to me—like I was no longer worth keeping alive—is what haunts my nightmares.
Even worse than that is the fact that they wanted me to suffer before I died. If they weren't in a hurry, I'm pretty sure they would've waited for me to turn completely so they could torture me.
All I know about hunters comes from the packs I've been with. I can tell that they're extremely dangerous, and even one is a huge threat. Now, it looks like two have driven away an entire pack.
“I don't even know how we can sort this either,” Grant sighs. “Maybe if we—” His voice is cut off by a long yawn.
He sounds tired. Has he even slept at all?
There's no sound for a bit, but soon Grant speaks again. “Don't worry about that. I'll sleep when I get this job done.”
I should tell him to go to bed. That's my job, isn't it?
As much as I want to march in there and tell Grant that it's time to sleep, I feel like I may have already gone against the alpha enough today.
The last thing I want is to be labeled as a nuisance on literally my first day on the job. Other than that, I'm not certain how my wolf side feels about telling the alpha what he should do.
It's going to take a bit of getting used to before I'm fully comfortable with this sort of thing.
Grant continues his conversation, but it's virtually impossible to understand from just his part of the story.
I retreat from his door and return to mine, entering the room quietly.
It's still early evening, but I'm more than a little tired already. I go directly to my bed and fall right into it. After such a day, I'm very content with letting sleep take over me, and that's exactly what happens.
I'm not sure what wakes me up the next morning, but it does so really early. It's so early that it still almost seems dark outside, but my phone tells me the actual time is just a couple of minutes past six.
I let out a yawn before getting up and stretching. Something that has taken a bit of getting used to is how nimble I am in the morning. I literally just woke up, but I'm pretty sure I can jump out my window and not get injured in the process.
Maybe I should go on runs in the morning.
There's a lot of space around me for some outdoor activities. I'm sure it's the sort of thing Grant will approve of for me, but I'm still not certain if he'd like to join in the activity. He seems like the type to jump for his laptop the second his eyes open.
There's no sound when I step out of the bedroom. I'm sure he's asleep, even though I don't know when that sleep actually started.
I travel down the stairs, going to the kitchen yet again. This time, it's almost unrecognizable. The twins have clearly gone all out with supplies because I've never seen this amount of food before.
My curiosity leads me to a hidden pantry I hadn't noticed yesterday. It’s stocked to the brim with groceries.
“Okay, now that's a lot.”
I open the fridge and see the same result. The only thing that is how I left it last night is the half-eaten chicken. The realization that hits me makes me feel terrible.
“Grant didn't have dinner.” I sigh, shaking my head. “Molly was right. I need to help that man—now.” I take out what's left of the chicken and place it on the kitchen island before looking around at the additional supplies. “Okay, I can work with this.”
I immediately work on creating a heavy breakfast for him, incorporating eggs, sausages, and anything I can find to form a full meal.
I work in the kitchen for just under an hour. The result is a great meal that almost tempts me to devour it. To stop this urge, I walk out the back door, coming face to face with nature.
I have to admit, the view around me is a gorgeous one. Even with the glimpse I had from my bedroom, I could tell. It feels much better to see it without glass, though, and without the pressure of having to run into nature to transform.
I can't imagine it.
The feeling after becoming a wolf is amazing, I can admit that. It's almost like I'm in a prison most of the time, and I get to be free.
That's the best way to describe it. The problem with that is that I have the most painful time breaking out of this prison, making me wonder if it's even worth it in the first place. I'd be perfectly happy never having to transform.
I breathe in the fresh morning air, letting it work its way into my lungs. The gentle breeze that dances on my face makes me feel much better about being outside.
“Okay, maybe I'll actually like it here. Maybe.”