11. Sienna
11
SIENNA
I wend my way through the trees, a spring in my step as I head toward my cabin to see Chase. I’m still giddy from yesterday. There’s a delicious ache between my thighs, reminding me of all the dirty things we did together by the fire.
I can’t wait to do them all again.
Sex with Chase was magical, and falling asleep in his arms made me feel closer to him than ever. But it was more than just physical; it was the best night of my life. I’ve never felt so happy, and now I’m starting to question my plans to return to Denver tomorrow. I want more time with Chase. Heck, I want all the time in the world with him, and now that my cabin is getting close to completion, I have an excuse to stay longer.
I know it’s more complicated than that. I have a job to think about—a life back in Denver. But right now, I’m drunk on my sexy lumberjack and happy to let my fantasies about the future run wild. Butterflies are fluttering through me, and my heart starts to thump with anticipation as I get closer to my cabin, desperate to see Chase.
As I approach, I hear voices: Chase and another man. They’re blocked by the cabin, standing on the other side, but I can hear their conversation as it drifts toward me through the trees.
“—tell her. She needs to know how you feel,” says the unfamiliar voice.
I freeze, listening.
Are they talking about me?
There’s silence for a few moments, and I strain my ears, hardly daring to breathe.
Then I hear the unmistakable rumble of Chase’s voice.
“Sienna doesn’t belong here with me.”
The words hit me like a punch to the gut, sucking the breath from my lungs. I stand there, waiting for him to say something else, but at that moment, Moose appears from behind the cabin, yapping when he sees me.
Crap.
I don’t want to be caught eavesdropping, especially not after what I just heard. With a hollow pain in my chest, I turn on my heel and race back toward Chase’s cabin, stumbling through the front door. I feel numb as I collapse onto the couch and tuck my knees up to my chin, trying to swallow down the emotion clogging my throat.
I can’t get the words out of my head.
“Sienna doesn’t belong here with me.”
I feel like somebody is trying to claw my heart out of my chest. It hurts so much more than it should. Chase made it clear from the start that he wanted me out of his forest, and I was stupid to think he’d changed his mind. This whole idea was a crazy mistake. Megan was right—I don’t know what I was thinking coming out here. I never should have left Denver.
With a sniff, I rub my stinging eyes, trying to get my emotions under control.
It doesn’t change anything, I tell myself. This was always meant to be a temporary trip. Four days, that’s what I told Megan. So, what difference does it make if I leave today instead? It’s only a day early, and Chase obviously doesn’t want me here.
With a shuddering breath, I get off the couch and start to pack my things, dragging my suitcase into the living room and grabbing my duffle bag just as Chase strides through the front door, his jaw set. He looks surprised to see me awake, and his attention snaps to my luggage. A deep crease appears between his brows as he looks at it.
“I’m going to head back to the city,” I say, my voice wobbly.
He looks at me, his frown deepening. “I thought you were leaving tomorrow?”
I can’t meet his gaze so I stare down at my feet. “It’s a long drive, so I figured I better go now.”
There’s silence for a few moments.
“When are you coming back?” Chase asks.
There’s a hint of something pained in his voice, almost like the question hurts him.
No, that doesn’t make sense.
He wants me out of here. He’s always wanted me out of here.
“I don’t know,” I tell him honestly, pressing my lips together. Tears are pricking behind my eyes, but I force them back. “I never should have come here in the first place. I don’t know what I was thinking. I was stupid to think I could make this work.”
“Sienna, what are you talking about?”
I throw my hands up in frustration, ignoring my suitcase as it topples over. “All of this was just a stupid fantasy. The cabin, the writing, all of it. I shouldn’t be here.”
“That’s not true, Sienna.” Chase scowls at me. “You know it’s not true.”
I let out a harsh breath, scowling right back at him. “You don’t have to keep pretending. I know you don’t want me here.”
“Are you kidding?” He looks bewildered as he takes a step toward me. “I want you here more than anything.”
“I heard what you said, Chase.”
“What did I say?”
His confusion is infuriating. How can he pretend he wasn’t talking about this just a few minutes ago?
“You said I don’t belong here with you.” I cross my arms. “I heard those words come out of your mouth, and if that’s how you feel, then…then fine! But don’t stand here and lie about it.”
As soon as the words leave my mouth, the anger seeps out of me as quickly as it arrived, replaced by miserable numbness.
How did I get it all so wrong?
Why did I think he’d changed his mind about me being here?
Understanding dawns on Chase’s face, and he takes another step toward me.
“Sienna, did you hear the rest of what I said?” he asks quietly.
“I…no.” I swallow hard. “But your words were pretty clear.”
“I was talking to my friend Ronan, telling him about you.” Chase’s eyes pierce mine. “I told him you didn’t belong in the forest with me because you deserve the world, Sienna. You deserve more than a life out here in the woods.” He sighs, running a hand over his beard. “I wanted to ask you to stay here with me, but I’m scared of not being able to give you everything you deserve.”
I blink at him, my breath quickening as I process his words. “You were going to ask me to stay?”
“Yes,” he says firmly. “I want you to stay more than anything. I’m fucking crazy about you.”
“You are?”
“Of course I am.” He closes the gap between us, cupping my cheek as he looks down at me. “I love you, Sienna. And if you don’t want to stay in Cherry Hollow, then I’ll do anything to be with you. I’ll move to Denver if that’s what you want. I don’t care where I am as long as you’re there.”
I gawk up at him, feeling like I might faint. My head is spinning. A minute ago I was certain Chase wanted me gone. Now it looks like I was totally wrong.
“Talk to me, sugar,” he says. “Say something.”
“I…I love you too.”
As soon as I say it, I know it’s the truth. My grumpy lumberjack stole my heart the minute I saw him, and I don’t want to go back to life without him. I understand why he’s worried about me giving up city life, but I’m ready to take a leap of faith. Living out in the woods for the past few days has made me happier than I’ve ever been in Denver, and I’m ready to leave publishing behind and finally go after what I want. Maybe I’ll make it as an author and maybe I won’t, but either way, I’ll have Chase by my side.
“I want to stay here with you,” I tell him. “I’ve been dreading having to leave.”
Chase’s eyes twinkle as he looks at me. “You’re sure? I don’t want you to have any regrets. If you want me to come to Denver, just say the word, princess.”
“I’m sure.” My eyes well up with tears. “I don’t want to leave, Chase. I want to stay in Cherry Hollow with you.”
Chase makes a deep noise in his throat, something passionate and full of relief as he throws his arms around me, pulling me close. He smothers me with kisses, his beard tickling my face, making me giggle.
“Fuck, I love you so much,” he says, breathing hard. “You have no idea, Sienna.”
My heart somersaults, sadness forgotten, every inch of me buzzing with happiness. “I love you too.”
We hold each other tight, laughing as Moose jumps up to try and join our embrace, howling triumphantly as though he understands what’s happening.
“I’m sorry I said you didn’t belong here, Sienna,” Chase says, still holding onto me, his mouth against my ear. “I know how bad that sounds, and it’s not what I meant. You do belong here. You belong right here with me.”
He plants a kiss on the top of my head and I sigh blissfully, melting against him.
There’s only one thing still bothering me.
“I need to go back to Denver for a few days,” I mutter. “I need to see my sister and explain everything.”
Chase pulls back to look at me. “I’ll come with you.”
I shake my head, smiling at him weakly. “I need to do this by myself. Give me a week to get everything sorted out, okay?”
Chase scowls, looking like he’s about to argue.
“I’ll be back before you know it. I promise.”
He grunts, resting his forehead against mine. “You better be. Or you best believe I’ll be driving straight to Denver to bring you home.”
I wrap my arms around his neck. “Trust me. I’ll come back to you, Chase.”
He kisses me then, firm and passionate, a kiss so full of love that it takes my breath away. I soften against his mouth, losing myself in him, our hearts beating as one.
Only one more week. Then I can start a new life with my gorgeous lumberjack: just me, him, and Moose. No more hectic city life. No more trying to follow my sister’s dreams.
Just me and my man.
And I can’t freakin’ wait.
“This is a nice surprise!” my sister says as I walk into her office. “I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow.”
It took Chase and me a long time to say goodbye, but I finally drove back to Denver, straight to the headquarters of Luminary Press. I was overflowing with happiness on the drive here, thinking about Chase and our future together, but now that I’m face-to-face with my sister, I’m nervous as heck.
I give her a quick hug. “Hi.”
Megan looks at me appraisingly, pulling a leaf out of my hair. “How come you left early?” she asks. “Did you get bored out there?”
“Uh, not exactly.”
My sister watches me expectantly, waiting for my explanation. I don’t know where to begin, so I decide to tell her all at once. Hopefully, it will be quicker that way, like ripping off a Band-Aid.
“I met someone,” I say, my voice coming out in a rush. “In the woods, I met a man. A lumberjack.”
“Right…” Megan says, drawing out the sound with a frown.
I struggle to find the words to continue, my eyes darting all over the place, anywhere but my sister.
“I…I’ve decided to move to Aunt Carol’s cabin.”
Megan stares at me. “What are you talking about?”
“I don’t want to work here anymore.” I swallow hard, my heart pounding. “I’m really grateful that you got me this job, but I don’t want to do it anymore. I’m quitting and moving to Cherry Hollow.”
My sister looks like her brain is short-circuiting.
“So, you want to quit your job and move to the woods,” she repeats slowly, looking at me like I’ve got a third arm growing out of my forehead.
“Yes.” I think of Chase waiting for me at his cabin, and it helps me find the courage to keep on talking. “I’m moving to Cherry Hollow and I’m going to try and be an author.”
Megan’s disbelief turns to concern. “Sienna, are you feeling okay?”
“I’m feeling better than I’ve ever felt in my life.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t understand. Is this a prank?”
“Megan, please listen to me,” I say desperately. “I know it’s a lot to take in, but I’m not happy in Denver. I’m not happy working at Luminary. The publishing industry is your passion: it’s not mine and it never has been. You thrive in this hectic, stressful work environment, and that’s great, but I don’t.”
Megan sucks in a breath, massaging her temples like she has a headache. “Sienna, it’s not about the work. I know being an editorial assistant is stressful—I started at the bottom just like you. But if you keep working your way up, you can make great money.”
“I don’t care about making lots of money or living in a giant penthouse,” I tell her. “I don’t want the things you want, Megan. And that’s okay! But just because we want different things, that doesn’t mean my dreams are unimportant.”
My sister considers me, her usually perfect exterior looking a little ruffled as she chews on her lip, thinking hard.
“I just want you to have a good life,” she says eventually. “I want you to have everything you want.”
“I know.” I reach out to squeeze my sister’s slender hand. “And I love you for it. But the stuff I want can’t be bought.”
She sighs. “If you don’t want to work at Luminary, I can accept that. Maybe I pushed you too hard for this position. But quitting your job doesn’t mean you have to leave the city.”
“I know, but I want to. City life isn’t for me, Megan. I want something slower-paced.”
“Does all this have something to do with this mysterious man you met in the woods?” she asks, arching an eyebrow.
“Yes,” I admit. “I know you’ll think it’s crazy, but I want to be with him.”
“You’re quitting the city for this guy?”
“It’s not like that. Chase isn’t pressuring me to leave the city—I want to leave. That’s why I went to Aunt Carol’s cabin in the first place. I needed to get away.” I sigh, determined not to back down. “I’m not expecting you to agree with my decision. But I need to make my own choices, and this is what I’m choosing. This is what I believe will make me happy.”
Megan doesn’t speak for a long time. She looks at me, still worrying her lip with her perfect teeth.
“I think you’re making a mistake,” she says eventually. I open my mouth to argue, but she holds a hand up to stop me. “But maybe it’s about time I let you make your own mistakes.” She frowns. “If this is what you want, then I won’t stand in your way. I hope it makes you happy, Sienna, and I really hope I’m wrong about it being a mistake.”
It’s more than I could have hoped for. I knew my sister would never fully embrace my decision, but she’s finally taking a step back and letting me make my own choices. Hopefully, with time, she’ll see it wasn’t a mistake. She’ll see just how happy Chase makes me, and she’ll know I made the right call.
“Thank you, Megan,” I say, throwing my arms around my sister. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” She pulls back to look at me, and I’m shocked to see tears welling in her eyes. I’ve never seen my sister cry before.”
“I’m going to miss you,” she says shakily.
“Oh, Megan…” I hug her tight. “We can visit each other all the time. I’ll only be a few hours away.”
She sniffs and nods, quickly composing herself. “Take care of yourself, okay? I want to meet this Chase guy as soon as possible. And don’t forget everything I said before about bears and wildcats.” She looks at me, her eyes full of sincerity. “But most of all, remember that you’ll always have a home with me in Denver, okay? I’m only a phone call away.”
“I know.” I smile at her, wiping a tear from my cheek. “Thank you. You’re the best big sister in the world.”
She laughs, smiling at me as she says, “That’s a very sweet lie, Sienna. But I’ll take it.”