8. Ashley #3
So I guess it’s just me reliving the other night, and he’s definitely moved on. It’s as it should be. But why do I have the urge to punch this random gym woman in the face? “I hope for her sake you’ll still remember her name next time you see her in the elevator.”
“Haha,” he says dryly. “How about you, besides being invited to shack up with your date’s mom and dad?”
“Oh God, don’t remind me.” I close my eyes and let out a sigh. “Not too much. I think I’m going axe throwing on a date on Tuesday, so pray that both of us come out unharmed. Other than that, I hung out with Laurel.”
“How’s she doing?”
“Over the moon. Her boyfriend is moving into her apartment, so she’s in nesting mode.”
I’m so focused on keeping any hint of jealousy out of my voice that I almost miss seeing Sebastian shudder. “What? Is the idea so horrifying to you, Bash?”
He looks mollified, like he didn’t intend for me to see that reaction. “I just don’t know how people do it, commit to being with the same partner forever.”
“Laurel is thrilled about it,” I say with a shrug.
“The idea of only having sex with one person for the rest of your life, of having them in your space day in and day out?” he replies, wrinkling his nose. “No thanks.”
I shake my head at him. “And yet you run a dating app. You should put that in your Single In The Six promo material: We can help you move towards the nightmarish hellscape of a long-term relationship. Really sells it.”
He smiles wryly. “People can use the app however they want. Lots of people want to do the long-term thing, but we’re also there to help with shorter-term companionship.”
I smirk at him. “Shorter is one way to put it.” More like hourly in his case.
He looks at me, suddenly serious. “You want that? You want the whole meeting-his-parents, brushing-your-teeth-while-he’s-in-the-shower, never-sleeping-with-anyone-else song and dance?”
“I do,” I say, and the longing for that kind of love seeps over me.
It’s true that I enjoy my single life, and I’m not ready to settle for just anyone for the sake of being coupled up.
But I’ve always hoped to find the One, get married, buy a small house and have a couple of kids one day.
To be with someone who sees the real unvarnished me and sticks around.
I want what Stevie and Andy have, what Laurel and Cal are working toward.
Realizing I’m the lone singleton in our trio makes my heart ache a little.
“But won’t it get boring?” His brows rise in disbelief, but there’s something else behind his eyes, like he’s actually terrified of the idea.
Having a revolving door of partners for another few decades sounds boring to me, but I’m not Sebastian.
“It doesn’t have to.” I don’t want to speak for someone else, but I can’t help adding, “Laurel says it keeps getting better and yes, even the sex part. There’s a lot to be said for trust and knowing your partner intimately.
” She says a lot more than that, but she probably wouldn’t want Sebastian to know those private details.
“Well, to each their own,” he says. “I’m glad they’re happy, but it’s not for me.”
I knew this about him. I’ve always known it from the first time we shared a six pack in our university dorm.
Other than his blip with a girlfriend many years ago, he’s been steady about avoiding commitment.
Still, hearing it spelled out like this makes my chest ache.
He may act detached, but he’s got a good heart, and I’m sure he could make someone happy if he really wanted to.
But that’s not fair. We’re allowed to want different things in life.
All the same, I’m a little sad thinking he’ll never experience what it’s like to be truly loved.
We finish our snacks, and he gets his coat to go home. When we hug at the door, for a moment I wish I could lean in and stay buried in his chest for a while, but I pull away and let him leave.
Miss Midtown Reel (with transcript)
Miss Midtown appears wearing a T-shirt with a heart on it.
“Hi everyone! I’m a few dates into this role of your local dating diva, and I’ve got a lot of thoughts.
“First, it’s been fun! I’ve been more open to meeting new people, some of whom I might not have replied to if I’d been focused on my mental image of Mr. Right.
You see, I’ve always had a type, a certain look that I lean towards, and more than that, an idea of which personalities and goals I need in a partner.
Maybe this is an opportunity to explore the idea that I don’t always know what I need.
“On the other hand, I think some non-negotiables are a must. As someone looking to settle down and have a couple of kids someday, I’d rather not invest in a relationship with a man who has no desire for something long-term.
I’m not into that ‘I’ll be the one to change him’ pipe dream.
Been there, done that [shakes head vehemently].
“I want to hear from you, the dating community. Are you open to whatever the internet gods throw at you, or are you targeted, running down your checklists, and anyone who doesn’t meet the criteria need not apply?
Have any of you found ‘the One’ when you threw caution to the wind and took a chance on a long shot, or is yours a cautionary tale?
Tell me in the comments, or make your own reel and tag me!
And best of luck to anyone trying to lock down a date for the illusory Valentine’s Day coming up! ” [blows a kiss to the camera]
Comments:
Me! I met my guy when I let go of the idea of who I was supposed to be with. We were total opposites but it turns out we balance each other out. Take a risk!
Oh no, I know what I need and I’m not wasting time on a guy who doesn’t want the same things. That was the story of my 20s…
Ugh, Valentine’s Day. Don’t remind me. F that noise.
I feel like there’s a middle ground. Don’t compromise on your core values and goals, but also don’t turn a guy down because his eyes are the wrong shade of blue or he likes pineapple on pizza. Some of y’all’s standards are ridiculous.