16. Miles #2
She sets the phone down and buries her face in her hands for a moment. When she looks up again, her eyes are glassy. She glances toward the kitchen, then straight at the hidden camera like she knows exactly where it is.
Sadie
Why can’t you just leave me alone? Why do you have to make me want you when I know this is wrong?
My fingers move across the screen before I can think twice.
Miles
Because you weren’t living before me. You were surviving. Going through the motions, smiling for your friends, carrying your brother’s problems on your back, pretending you’re fine. I give you something real. Something that makes you feel alive. Even if it scares you.
She reads it and shakes her head slowly, but she doesn’t put the phone down.
Sadie
You scare the shit out of me… but when you talk to me like this, when you say things like that, I feel seen. Really seen. No one else has ever paid attention to me the way you do. And that terrifies me more than anything.
She looks down at her phone, biting her lower lip and then she stops as if she’s worked something out. Her fingers move over the phone typing away and then a message comes through.
How do you know about my brother?
I watch her bite her lip, her thumb hovering over the keyboard. She’s flushed now, that familiar mix of fear and reluctant desire I’ve come to crave.
Miles
Then stop fighting it, baby. Tell me what you really want right now.
I know a lot of things.
She stares at the message for a long time. The camera catches the way her breathing has changed, it’s a little faster, a little shallower. She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth.
Sadie
I don’t know anymore.
Miles
Yes you do. Be honest with me. Are you wet right now thinking about me watching you?
Her head snaps around the room, looking for her laptop. There’s no way she can find the camera, so I’m not worried, but I smile knowing she’s thinking about me again.
Miles
Good girl. Don’t worry baby, I’ll make you come again, just say the word.
She screams into the pillow and I smile again. She wants me, she just can't say it because then she knows that she’ll never be able to walk away from me.
***
“Miles, you look horrible, are you sleeping?” My mother stands in front of me, cups my face and looks at me, and all I can do is smile.
“I’m still handsome.”
She smiles and walks away. “You know I worry about you; you need to sleep.”
“Declan came back from The Pit this morning, are you not going to say anything to him?” I ask, and Declan starts laughing.
“She already did. Lucky for you she loves me the most.” Declan grabs a beer and walks away.
“You wish.” I give my mom a kiss on the cheek and follow her to the sitting room with the cheesecake she’s made.
They’ve called us here with some news, and we’re still waiting. I need to talk to Cain about these girls. Maybe this isn’t the best place, but I didn’t sleep all fucking night, and I have a feeling this shit is going to fuck with my head more than I want to admit.
I sit down next to Hayden handing him a beer, and Autumn smiles, cutting a cake for everyone. Cain is talking to dad when Autumn speaks.
"We have some news," Autumn smiles at everyone. "We're expecting."
My mom screams with excitement, and I mean her fucking screams pierce my ear drum. Lileah makes a sound that could only be described as a controlled explosion of joy.
My dad tells Cain that’s the news you share the moment you walk through the door, making Cain smile and then he pulled him into a bear hug. Mom is already talking to Autumn about everything. She’s not giving anyone a chance to say congratulations to her, so I walk over to Cain.
“Never thought you would have a kid; this is going to be fun.”
“You’re babysitting,” he jokes, and I laugh.
“No, I won't, there’s no way you would trust any of us with the little one. Congratulations.” I let the rest of the family talk to Cain, and I walk to the kitchen.
How can I talk to him now? But I have to, this is Cain he’s not going to let this news get in the way of business.
I turn around when I hear footsteps, and I know without turning around that it’s Cain. “I have a feeling you want to talk.” I lean on the counter.
“Maybe tomorrow…”
“Now.” Well at least I know I was right; nothing will come before business for the man.
“You could have told me this job was for Lincoln, I would have looked for his girl first.” All he does is nod.
He fucking nods. "Renee Park, second cousin on his mother's side.
That's why you took the case. That's why you gave it to me and told me to go slow and didn't tell me what I was actually looking for. "
A pause.
"Yes," he says.
"I've been working on this, Cain. If I'd known she was connected to Lincoln, I would have built the search differently. I would have looked into her first…”
"Lincoln didn't want you to know."
"Why?"
"Because he didn't want the case worked as a favor." Cain looks at the window. "He wanted it worked properly, without the bias of knowing whose name was in the file."
"That's not his decision to make about my investigation."
"No," Cain says. "It was mine."
"I need you to tell me everything," I say. "All of it. Whatever Lincoln told you, whatever you know that isn't in those files."
Cain is quiet.
"Cain, I know what's on those videos. I've watched all three of them. Over and over, frame by frame, pulling them apart, looking for something I can use. I’m the one watching them being raped repeatedly, beaten, sold, crying, and screaming.
" I stop. "You know how that fucks you up, watching that shit over and over hoping you find something, fucking anything? The least you can do is tell me something.”
The room goes quiet behind me. I realize too late that my voice is loud, and everyone is looking at us. Cain looks at me, then at the room.
Lileah looks at me, her hand moves to her bracelet, I can see that she finally understands the gift I gave her and why.
“There’s nothing else to say, Lincoln wants his niece found, but he thought if you knew that then you wouldn’t work on all the cases, and you’d only focus on her.
The answer to whatever this is, isn’t just about her, it's about all of them and I need the best hacker I know to find answers.” Cain stops and looks over his shoulder, before turning back to me.
“You’ve already got more than I did. I couldn’t find the videos that you did.
I need you to link something, give me a name and I will get information from them. ”
I stare at him for a moment, and all I can do is nod. “I’ll see if I can get the name of a person who is lower on the ladder, it might not be a lot but I’m working on it.”
“Can we put business to the side and celebrate now?” I hear my mom and I smile walking back to the family.
Cain lowers his voice on the way back to the room.
“I would never have given you the envelope if I didn’t think you could handle it.
Talk to me if it gets too much.” I give him a nod and sit back down as the conversation has already moved on to the baby nursery.
But my head is in two places right now, one is the girls and how I need to get back to work, and two is on Sadie hoping she's thinking about me.