Chapter 8
Sadie
Laying wrapped in Kane's arms, after mind blowing sex, my body still slightly abuzz. My breathing only just returning to normal.
"Sadie." I look up to see Kane looking serious. "Would you run away with me?"
I smile. It's like something he might have said when we were kids.
Though his serious look tells me he isn't joking.
I put my arms around him, lay my head on his chest and hug him tight.
I can see the hurt little boy in his handsome face and it hurts me.
I want to comfort him. Hold him. But I'm not about to run away with him.
I'm done moving around. I want to settle in one place.
And it breaks my heart to think of Kane living his life in broken cabins all alone.
After a minute or two, just holding each other, I look up at him again. Resting my head on my hand to better see his reaction to what I want to say.
"Kane, there is probably a reason why you came back here. Okay, you're not in town, but you could have picked anywhere and you came back to Starfall Mountain. Maybe you were looking for connections. For family even?"
"I bought a house in town."
"Really? But you don't want to live in it." Looking around the hay loft. "Well, I can see why. Who could give up this paradise."
He grins. Kisses me. Shakes his head. "I just felt.... I've always felt like I don't quite fit."
Brushing his hair off his forehead. "I understand that. People called us wild. Reckless. I prefer free spirit. We can do and go anywhere we want. You, Kane, can do anything...be anyone you want."
He rests his forehead on mine. Struggling with his own demons.
Running my hands over his arms, I whisper. "I've always felt we fit together. And recent events indicate we fit very well together." I grin to try and lighten the mood.
He shakes his head again. His eyes are serious. "You deserve better than me." Even as he says the words his hand runs along my thigh. As though, like me, he just can't enough of touching me. He can resist all he likes, I can feel it in my heart that we should be together.
"We could go somewhere else. " He plants little kisses across my shoulder. "Somewhere we would be safe." His hot mouth on my breasts is making it hard to concentrate. "We could have a life together."
He leans up and kisses me. The hunger and urgency is back. My need to touch him. To be joined with him. We kiss as he moves his body over mine. Bringing everything to life. His chest teasing over my nipples. The pressure of his weight between my legs.
But before we get carried away, I put my hands to his face, hoping that he hears my words. "I'm done with running, Kane. Moving from one place to another. I deserve a home. I want a partner and children. And Kane, you deserve that too."
With a groan he kisses me hard. I can feel his need.
I need it too. I need him inside of me. I need him more than words can convey and so I tell him with my body.
He is erect and hard and pushes inside of me.
There is an urgency to our touch. An intensity.
A need to convey something we can't put into words.
A connection we don't want broken. As he moves faster, harder.
Thrusting with all of his body. Our gasps and groans fill the air.
Up here in this hay loft, our bodies entwined.
In this moment we have all we need. Because we have each other.
Later, as Kane lays sleeping, I quietly get dressed , gather my things, and with one last look towards the barn, I get in my car and head towards town.
For so many years I loved Kane. We were friends.
We were teenagers together. We understood and challenged each other.
And now, the man who held me in his arms, he has my heart.
I wipe away a tear from my cheek as I drive.
It hurts to leave. But I can only hope that this is not the end.
That Kane can overcome his demons and come back to town.
And then, maybe we can be together. He is like a wild animal.
And my years as a wildlife photographer has taught me, you can't make a wild animal go where you want it to be.
You have to wait. You have to wait for it to come to you.
If I was younger I might have stayed in that hay loft.
I might have hopped on the back of his bike and gone wherever we wanted.
But it's not the life I want. And honestly, I don't believe it is the life Kane wants either.
I think he has convinced himself that he doesn't deserve anything better.
But I know he is worth more than that. I can only hope that he sees it too.