9. Nova #2
I stayed close without being intrusive. I held his hand when he’d let me, cleared away untouched plates of food at his parents’ house, and spent a few quiet, heavy nights at his townhouse, just holding him while he stared at the ceiling in complete silence.
But as the days rolled on, Jax threw himself entirely into taking care of his mother and managing the mountain of estate paperwork alongside Rick.
He was constantly surrounded by family, and, as much as I loved him, I forced myself to step back.
I didn’t want to get in the way, and I didn’t want to force him to manage us on top of his grief.
Even with the distance, and even with the heavy, unspoken grief hanging between us, the fear I’d felt before the heart attack was completely gone.
I knew where we stood now. I knew how hard he’d held onto me in his office right before the world shattered, even if he hadn’t spoken the words I’d needed to hear.
Whatever came next—whatever corporate storms were created, whatever fallout came from Onyx, or however long it took Jax to heal—I knew we would make it past it. Together.
It was a quiet Tuesday evening when the silence finally broke.
I was sitting on my living room couch, a cold iced coffee resting in my hands while my laptop hummed on the coffee table. I hadn’t seen Jax in three days, though we’d exchanged brief, tender text messages every morning and night.
The soft, familiar chime of my apartment doorbell cut through the quiet room.
My heart instantly skipped a beat. Setting my mug down, I walked over to the front door and unlocked it.
Jax was standing in the brightly lit hallway.
He looked completely worn out. His dark tie hung loosely around his neck.
The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up to his elbows, and there were shadows purpling the skin beneath his blue eyes.
But when his gaze lifted to meet mine, the cold, distant shutter he’d carried since his father’s death disappeared.
“Hey,” he said, his voice low and gravelly.
“Hey,” I whispered, stepping back to let him inside.
Before I could even close the door, he reached out, his fingers wrapping around my wrist as he gently pulled me to his chest. He kicked the door the rest of the way shut with his heel, wrapped both arms tightly around my waist, and buried his face into the crook of my neck, letting out a long breath that sounded like he’d been holding it for weeks.
“I missed you,” he murmured against my skin, his hands pressing warm and solid into the small of my back. “God, Nova, I missed you so much.”
I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, burying my hands in his hair, pulling him as close as physically possible. “I’m right here, Jax. I’m not going anywhere.”
We’d gone slow. We’d taken things fast. This, now, was something else. This was pure comfort.
Our eyes locked as we undressed one another. We talked about our likes and dislikes. We teased. We laughed, moaned, cried out, and, in the end, hit our peaks in unison.
I had never experienced anything like it before. Nor, I’d wager, would I ever again with anyone else.
For two glorious days, we were back “on.” Nights were spent wrapped around one another and our days, well, we pretended we weren’t seeing each other’s fun parts to avoid gossip at the office.
Then I walked into the office one morning after leaving Jax’s place only to find out from his brother that Jax was heading back to Vegas for a meeting with Kit. He was leaving for the airport in under an hour.
Why in the hell hadn’t he said anything to me?
I marched into his office, prepared for an explosion, only to come up short when I noticed his mother sitting across from him.
“Oh.” I stopped dead in my tracks, the hurt and anger still boiling deep inside me, but now, tempered down. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“It’s okay, Nova,” Ruth Mylonas said, standing up. “I was just leaving.” She turned back to Jax. “I trust you’ll handle it?”
Jax nodded and stood to give his mother a soft kiss on her cheek.
“I’ll see you when you get back,” she said, then she walked over to me and touched my arm softly. “You’re looking well today.”
“Thanks, you too,” I said, stepping aside to let her pass through the door. “Is everything all right?” I asked upon seeing Jax’s look, worry instantly replacing my hurt and anger.
“Yeah.” He ran his fingers through his hair and avoided my eyes. “Listen, I know why you’re here.” His eyes moved up to mine. “Please, just this once, trust me. I need you here. Not in Vegas where I can be distracted.”
I waited a heartbeat as every fiber of my being went tense. “Distracted?”
He chuckled, although I could tell there was no real humor behind it. “Yes. You are the biggest distraction in my life. I need to land this account. With my brother being left in charge of this place”—he motioned around his office—“I can’t afford any more distractions right now.”
“So, that’s all this was.” I motioned between us. “A distraction.” My heart shattered into a million pieces in my chest. Is that was his mother was here for? To warn him about distractions? To get him in line?
I liked Ruth Mylonas, and I thought she liked me. After all, we’d known one another for years.
I couldn’t imagine her wishing ill of me, of us, let alone warning Jax to steer clear of me. Hell, I was pretty sure she’d been rooting for us to become more than just friends for years. But right now, my world was upside down. Everything was turned around. Nothing made sense.
Jax’s hands lifted, as if to hold off what was coming next. “That’s not what I—”
Before he could finish the sentence, I narrowed my eyes. “Fine,” I interrupted. “Go.” I turned on my heels and stormed out of his office. I could hear him calling me as I shut the door behind me.
I was done being his “distraction.” I’d waited long enough. Years and years. I knew he’d just lost his dad, but I also knew that there was always going to be some reason he pulled away from me.
I wasn’t going to be anyone’s distraction. I locked myself in my office until Sofia knocked on the door. We headed across town for one of our favorite lunch spots.
I wanted to open up to her, really I did. But instead, I spent the time listening to her talk about work and Rick.
Going back to my empty apartment that evening somehow felt more lonely than before.
I cried myself to sleep and woke even angrier than before.
Deciding it wasn’t worth trying to work with the headache I’d developed, I called in sick and spent the day watching reruns on my sofa while ordering junk food for delivery.
When I saw Jax next, I was determined to not fall for his tricks again. I had to remain strong. I needed to keep the distance between us.
In truth, I knew I should have moved on years ago. He just wasn’t ready for commitment. For what I wanted from him. So I was going to make it easy for him. By the time he was back in town, I had lined up two dates.
The first one, for the afternoon that Jax came back to town, I went out with Elis Brown, a twenty-eight-year-old attending engineering school locally. He was the complete opposite of ‘my type.’ He wore glasses, had light blond hair, and was roughly my height.
We met at the coffee shop at the corner during my afternoon break. Safe. Within the first five minutes of meeting, Elis and I both knew there was zero spark between us. Still, we sat and chatted, laughed, and enjoyed the short break in our very busy lives.
As I got up to leave and head back to the office, I bumped into a solid mass just outside the doors of the coffee shop.
Jax stood there, holding a cup of coffee in his hands, looking at me as if he’d just witnessed the worst accident in his life. He looked like he’d just stepped off the plane.
Before he could say anything, I arched my brows at him.
“Good afternoon, Mr. Mylonas,” I said, then I skirted around him and continued down the sidewalk toward the office.
“What game is this?” he said, catching up with me.
“Game?” I glanced over at him.
“I just get off a flight and stop for some coffee to see you…” He motioned behind him. “Who was that?”
I stopped and he almost bumped into me, spilling some of his coffee on his shoes.
Tilting my head, I shrugged. “Just a distraction,” I answered, then I turned and marched into the building, leaving him on the sidewalk with coffee stains on his shoes.