Chapter 7
Serena
The air under my blanket is suffocating.
My hot breath shakes as I attempt to even the cadence. With every exhale, the air thickens around me. If I make myself as small as possible, I’ll eventually disappear.
Please God, I just want to disappear forever. Nobody would miss me.
And then I hear it.
The click of the bedroom door when he turns the doorknob, followed by the achingly slow protest of the hinges. I grip my blanket tighter, counting the steps.
One.
He’s made it just past the threshold.
Two.
He’s by the dresser.
Three.
He’s between the dresser and the foot of my bed.
Four.
The foot of my bed.
Five.
I can feel his presence just outside of my blanket beside me. A blast of frigid air fills the inside around me as the barrier between the blanket and my mattress is broken.
Since the other night, I’ve been getting flashbacks during the day along with nightmares every night
I have tried talking to Tyler about it, but somehow, I don’t think he would take it very well. I’m afraid that once he knows, he is going to be disgusted and leave me. Like I’m dirty or tainted somehow.
Besides, when do you even bring that up? It’s not like it’s good for dinner conversation.
Hey honey, can you pass the salt? Oh, and by the way, when I was younger my cousin used to sneak into my room and sexually assault me. How was your day?
Yeah, no.
Then again, maybe I should tell him. Give him an easy out and deal with the broken pieces on my own.
I’m not sure exactly when the nightmares started again, only that they started again after Tyler moved in.
Things were great in the beginning. He opened doors for me, would bring me flowers just because, complimented me all the time. The perfect gentleman.
Now, it’s like he’s a completely different person. I don’t know what it was about moving in that flipped a switch, but it is the only thing that I keep going back to that makes sense.
To be honest, I don’t even remember the last time he told me I was beautiful.
I get more romance from my book boyfriends than I do from my own real-life boyfriend. The one that is supposed to be sweeping me off my feet.
I just want a man who knows what he wants, treats me like a princess, worships the ground I walk on. Maybe throw me up against a wall or two and show me who I belong to.
Is that too much to ask?
I thought maybe we just hit a rough patch like all couples do, and that eventually we would get through it. But now, I’m not so sure. After his blow up, I’m questioning everything. I feel like maybe I don’t know him like I thought I did.
Pulling up to work, I find my parking space, grab my bag and badge, and head toward the back entrance door to the clinic. Feeling lighter than last week. Thankfully, it has calmed down a bit since Keirsten has been back.
I’m honestly surprised that Justine let her come back to work after two weeks of being MIA. I was convinced that she would be fired on the spot. Anyone else would have been. So what makes Keirsten so special?
We tried everything we could to reach her, going as far as calling her emergency contact. But nobody had heard from her other than the texts she sent to Justine to tell her she wouldn’t be coming in.
Then all of a sudden, she just shows up Monday two weeks ago, clocking in as if she was only coming back from a long weekend. No explanation. No apology. Nothing.
She was in Justine’s office for at least an hour before she started her shift. I tried talking to her, but she was so closed off. And every time I look at her, I catch her already watching me.
I wonder how it’ll be today. Keirsten and her provider were moved to our side of the clinic on Tuesday. Probably because Jules wouldn’t leave the poor girl alone.
That girl is so nosey. She is the kind of neighbor that would be vacuuming their patio when the police are called next door, just so she can watch the commotion.
On the other hand, she would make a fantastic FBI agent, or even a journalist. And I can always count on her to know the latest gossip when I am feeling too in my head and need to escape to someone else’s drama.
After I drop my lunch off in the break room, I go to our shared office to prep my charts for the day ahead.
“I can’t talk right now, I’m at work. You know that.
” Kiersten’s hushed voice comes from around the corner.
“No, I don’t want to leave. But you told me I could come back as long as I behaved.
Yes bu—.” As soon as she noticed I was standing in the doorway, she cut her sentence short and hung up the phone.
“Is everything ok?” I ask.
“Oh Serena.” She adjusts her scrub top with shaky hands. “Yes, everything is great.” Turning her attention to her computer, she pulls up a patient’s chart without a glance towards my direction.
“Are you sure? You sounded kinda scared on the phone?” Approaching with caution, I sit next to her hoping she knows I am an ally and not an enemy.
“I’m fine.” She clips. “Just mind your own business.” And with that, she grabs one of the plastic folders next to her and walks out of the office.
I blink, caught off guard by her response. She is usually so sweet. I make a mental reminder to ask Jules if she noticed any strange behavior from Keirsten last week.
Three hours later, it’s finally time for lunch. Jules and I decide on the sushi place across the street. It’s been a while since we have eaten there, and honestly, the leftover ravioli I packed from dinner last night isn’t sounding that great anymore.
We find a place at the counter and grab a couple plates of California rolls, shrimp tempura and edamame off of the sushi belt.
“Can I get you ladies something to drink?” The waitress steps up to our table, notepad already in hand.
“I’ll take a water and hot green tea, please.”
“I’ll have a Diet Dr. Pepper and a water as well, thanks.” Jules hands her the menu with a small smile.
The waitress nods and disappears toward the kitchen with our drink order.
I open my chopsticks and look at Jules. “Have you noticed anything weird with Keirsten lately? She totally snapped at me earlier today when I asked her if she was ok.”
“Oh my gosh yes. I am so glad you said something, because I thought maybe I was just being a little crazy.” She leans forward with excitement in her eyes, like she always does when there’s gossip on the table.
“She was on this weird ass phone call, and when I walked in the office, she cut it short and hung up. She actually seemed kind of scared if I’m being honest.” I pop a bite of sushi in my mouth.
“Yes! She has been acting so squirrelly!” Soy sauce splashes on the table while she pours it into the small dish in front of her. “I can’t put my finger on it, but it’s almost like she’s trying to hide something.” She places her chin in her hand, and her eyes start to glaze over.
Oh boy, I know that look. I brace myself for the onslaught of theories about to come my way.
“I wonder if it has to do with where she was during those two weeks.”
“I mean, it only makes sense. We don’t hear anything from her, nothing, zero, capute.
” She pinches her forefinger and thumb together into an “ok” sign and then draws an imaginary line in the air in front of her.
“And then POOF!” Her hands fist and open in front of her eyes, “She’s in the office. Like she appeared out of thin air.”
My eyes roll so far up into my head, I see grey matter. “Always so dramatic.”
“Maybe, she was secretly pregnant and left to give birth. Or maybe, she is in witness protection, and some mob killer tracked her down.” Jules spits off multiple scenarios, each one getting more wild and her voice increasing in pitch and speed each time.
“Ooooo, oh, maybe, juuuust maybe, she was part of an underground devil worshiping cult and she had to go be part of some crazy secret ritual where they sacrificed her to their Devil King and now she is a reincarnate of Lilith and sh-.”
I stuff a spicy California roll in her mouth before she could finish her sentence. Everyone within a 6-foot radius is now staring at us.
“Or,” I remove my chopsticks from her mouth and pick up my own roll, “here’s a thought. She had a normal personal issue that a normal person would need some time off for. I don’t know, like maybe anxiety, or the flu.” I wave my roll in the air before placing it in my mouth.
“At’s so… *chew* … bor’ng.” Jules manages to muffle out, and we both break into a fit of laughter.
When we get back from lunch, our receptionist Bethany stops by my desk with a bouquet of lilies and roses. “These arrived for you while you were at lunch.” She pops her gum and narrows her eyes at me before retreating down the hall.
They are stunning. The bouquet is so large that it completely covers my face.
I look, but don't see any cards. Tyler must have gotten me flowers. How sweet. He hasn’t done this in so long. He probably feels bad for yelling at me.
Five hours later, Jules and I are in the storage room at the back of the clinic grabbing supplies to do our room restocks for the night. I grab the gauze, bandages, culture swabs, alcohol swabs and chucks pads I need, place them on the cart outside of the door and push it towards my rooms.
I reach my hallway and open the first room on the right and I am immediately greeted with sobs.
Keirsten is sitting on the exam table, snot running down her nose with red rimmed puffy eyes. She jumps up from the table and fiercely wipes her eyes, grabbing a tissue from the counter.
“I-I’m so… sor… sorry.” She hides her face from me and her head hangs down as if in shame. “I did… didn’t mean to... *hiccup* take y-our room. I was ju-just… leaving.”
She walks past me and flinches when I gently grab her forearm. Her head is still cast downward, and I have to lean down to peer up at her. The poor thing must have been crying for at least ten, if not twenty.
“Hey,” I say softly, “It’s okay. I was just coming in to clean it up. But more importantly, are you ok?”
“I’m fine.” She sniffs. “I just had a fight with my boyfriend and now he’s mad at me.”