Chapter 26
Samantha
Aunt Cate swirled back into the living room, carrying a tall glass of ice water.
She eased herself into one of the new gray and white striped chairs and crossed her legs with typical no nonsense precision.
Sam had always admired her aunt, both for her business smarts and for the way she’d guided their family after their parents’ death.
Outside darkness had fallen and the only light came from a floor lamp Gabby had picked out for this room.
The lamp held three lights, arching into the room with paper shades that cast a mellow glow.
With Marlowe sitting next to her, Sam could feel the tension radiating from her younger sister.
Was Marlowe holding something back? She hadn’t said anything about her appointment with the psychologist, although Sam was dying to hear how that had gone.
She hated to make her sister uncomfortable by asking too many questions.
It was so easy for Sam to step back into her older sister role.
But maybe that appointment wasn’t on Marlowe’s mind. She turned her attention to their aunt, who sat glugging down her water as if she’d just escaped from the desert. “So? What happened with Seth? Where did you go, what did you talk about and did he kiss you?”
Aunt Cate gagged on the water. Sam smiled despite herself. Marlowe had never learned the art of subtlety. Somehow Aunt Cate managed a small, nervous laugh, the kind that said she’d been dreading this moment.
“Well,” Aunt Cate began, setting down her glass and adjusting the sleeve of her jacket, “he took me to the Walloon Lake Inn.”
“Oh, fancy,” Marlowe said. “A man with a motive. Isn’t that the place with the big windows overlooking the water?”
Sam nodded. “Josh mentioned it once. Said it was amazing. He never took me there, though.”
Her voice trailed off on that last line.
She wasn’t going into the places she hadn’t visited with Josh, the things they hadn’t done.
That was too morbid and she was not about to welcome sadness back into her life.
Pushing that thought aside, she rearranged an aqua and blue throw pillow behind her back.
Cate gave a small sigh, her eyes drifting to some invisible point just over Sam’s shoulder. “The restaurant is beautiful. But I wasn’t prepared for how hard it hit me.”
Eyes sparkling, Marlowe leaned forward. “Why? What happened?”
“That’s where Monty took me for our thirtieth anniversary,” Cate said quietly.
Sam gasped and Marlowe groaned. “Same table in front of the window, same candlelight.” Aunt Cate gave a short laugh that didn’t reach her eyes.
“All I could think about was that night with Monty when I thought how lucky we were to make it to our senior years together. I could almost hear his wonderful laugh.”
Sam’s throat tightened. She remembered Uncle Monty’s laugh, his steady gray glance that told you he understood.
Her uncle had always pulled out Aunt Cate’s chair and opened every door like she was the only woman in the world.
Losing him had cast a long shadow. Sam still felt the loss of her uncle, and she imagined Marlowe and Izzy did too.
“I get it,” Sam said softly. “It must’ve been hard to sit there with all those memories.
” This might be how she’d feel if she went back to the Weathervane, where she’d made memories with Josh.
She’d even taken Mia there the day they shopped for Mia’s dress.
Looking at the anguish on Aunt Cate’s face, Sam was determined to avoid that restaurant.
But maybe just for a while. Sometimes you have to banish your demons by yourself.
“It was hard being there,” Aunt Cate admitted, taking a handkerchief from her purse. “I tried to focus on Seth. He was kind and funny. You know how he is. But every time he smiled, I saw Monty.”
“You’re allowed to feel that, Aunt Cate,” Marlowe said slowly. “You were married for a long time. Did you tell Seth what you were feeling? Did he know?”
Cate winced, blotted her eyes and put the lace-edged handkerchief away. “Yes, I told him that I’d been there before with my husband. I don’t know why I did that. And afterward, I thought, good grief, Cate, could you be any more depressing?”
Sam and Marlowe exchanged a glance. “Maybe you wanted to have everything on the table. I’d call it smart. How did Seth take it?” Marlowe asked.
“Oh, he was wonderful. Said he appreciated my honesty. Said he didn’t mind sharing a few ghosts, as long as they were nice ghosts.” Her cheeks flushed pink. “He even asked if he could see me again.”
Sam smiled. “That sounds promising.” Seth Barrett was a nice man and she wanted the best for her aunt.
But Aunt Cate had pulled out her hankie again, twisting it in her hands. “Maybe. I like him. I do. But I don’t know if I’m ready.”
“That’s fair,” Sam said, leaning back against the pillows. “But being ready doesn’t always mean waiting until the ghosts leave. Sometimes you just let them sit in the corner while you live your life.”
Aunt Cate gave her a long, thoughtful look. “You sound like someone who’s been thinking about this.”
Sam gave a half-smile. “You could say that.”
Leaning over, Marlowe held out her hand. “Give me that darn hankie. You’re going to tear the lace right off.” Their aunt tucked the wrinkled white scrap back into her handbag.
Sam sat there mulling things over. All three of them were dealing with change.
Obviously Aunt Cate was still dealing with her grief.
Marlowe was trying to face her doubts, and Sam didn’t know what to do with the empty space where her marriage used to be.
She’d been divorced a year now and it still felt so raw, so recent.
Maybe that was why she couldn’t handle the situation with Josh and his family better.
But she pushed all that aside. She wanted to keep the conversation moving forward. “So,” she said, turning to Marlowe, “how was your meeting with the psychologist?”
That got a reaction. Marlowe’s hand went to her hair, tucking and untucking a strand behind her ear. “Oh, that.”
“Yes, that,” Sam said. “Wasn’t he going to make an evaluation?” Sam had never reached that point and wanted to hear all the details.
Cate brightened, maybe grateful to switch topics. “I know I’ve said this before, but it’s so wonderful of both of you to want to help Izzy that way. Such a blessing.” Then she bit her lip and Sam wondered. She did hope her aunt wasn’t spreading this information about town.
“I don’t know when I’m going to hear the results. Maybe I’ll need another appointment.” Marlowe wiggled her brows.
“Why?” Sam recognized the evasion instantly. What was going on here? “What do you mean?”
Marlowe bit her lower lip.
“Out with it,” Sam said. Her sister could be so annoying sometimes.
Marlowe blew out a breath. “All I meant was Dr. Lowe was easy to talk to. Maybe too easy. He asked questions, like about how I felt about children and motherhood. Would I feel attached to the baby I might carry? And suddenly I was thinking about Brad.” She gave a shaky laugh.
“Which is ridiculous. We just started dating.”
Wow, Sam did not expect that. “It’s not ridiculous. You met him at our Christmas party last year.”
“Oh, come on.” Giving a dismissive snort, Marlowe waved that away. “He was driving the Tall Oaks bus for some of his residents. I didn’t know he owned the place. Or that he was a runner.”
Her sister was right. They hadn’t realized that the good-looking driver who was so considerate with his passengers actually owned the business.
Cate raised an eyebrow. “Brad? Really? You were talking about babies and you thought of Brad?” Their aunt looked absolutely excited. And Sam felt a little thrill herself.
“Yeah, go figure. I don’t know why.” Marlowe was pulling back but Sam wanted to explore this more. “We went from running buddies to friends. Anyway, the weirdest thing happened during my session with Dr. Lowe.”
“Yes, okay, what was weird?” Did Sam have to squeeze out each word, the way she had when Marlowe was in college, calling home?
But that never worked with Marlowe. She could be bold and brash but she could also hug her secrets captive.
Sam would give her all the time she needed because she wanted the whole story.
“I’m sitting in a psychologist’s office talking about carrying my sister’s baby, and all I could think about was Brad.” She looked up, eyes swimming with confusion. “Isn’t that crazy?”
Sam reached for her sister’s hand. “Not at all. Maybe it’s an indication of something.”
Aunt Cate jumped right onto this train of thought. “Exactly my thought. Might this be an indication of what you want in your life? You know, after you have Izzy’s baby.”
Their aunt looked as if she were going to hop into her Mercedes and head for the nearest baby store.
“Izzy’s baby.” Marlowe said the word with such longing and respect. “I told him how much I enjoy Holly.”
“You’re doing something incredible,” Sam said. “Of course Holly would be a part of the conversation. You’re so good with her.”
“In any case, I think I might make another appointment with him.”
Sam exchanged another look with her aunt. “Why?”
“Just to talk through some things.” Was her efficient sister searching for words? “Some of my feelings.”
“About the surrogacy?” Sam intended to get to the bottom of this.
“Not really.” Marlowe sighed. “I mean, they said everything looks fine, but there’s a lot to the process and many things that could go wrong.”
“You’ll pass,” Sam said automatically. “But it’s okay to be scared,” she added, softening her voice. “It means you care. About the baby… and maybe about having a baby with Brad.” The final words came out softly, like a wish.
Sam would be an aunt and Holly would have more cousins. Sam was delighted when she realized that she didn’t feel bad about her disqualification anymore. One screaming morning with Jonah seemed to have done the trick. She smiled with relief.
Their aunt was watching them, her gaze distant. “You two remind me of myself and your mother when we were your age. We were always looking after each other, even when we didn’t want to be looked after and frustrated each other.”
Sam smiled. “That’s sort of my unofficial job title. The caregiver.”
Aunt Cate tilted her head. “Still the head of the family, are you?”
“Sometimes,” Sam said lightly. But inside, she wasn’t sure if it was pride or exhaustion that came with that role. Would she ever be ready to give that up?
After her aunt and uncle returned to New York, Sam had taken on all those responsibilities. She paid bills, soothed Izzy’s high school heartbreaks and kept Marlowe on track so she made it into college. Everything was on her shoulders. And now it wasn’t anymore. That felt good.
As Cate and Marlowe debated the next steps of the surrogacy, Sam found her mind drifting to her own situation. She could still hear Dr. Huggins’ voice, gentle but firm, explaining that her heart murmur, although minor, posed an unacceptable risk.
She’d smiled and said she understood. But when she left the office, she sat in her car for a good fifteen minutes and sobbed.
It wasn’t just about carrying a baby. It was also about being useful.
She wanted to give something to Izzy, who needed her.
The new client she’d brought on board liked her ideas and production would begin soon.
But that achievement did not give her personal satisfaction. It wasn’t the same as helping a sister.
A baby would be a gift without measure. But she didn’t have to be the one to give that gift. Her younger sister was able and willing. Time to accept that in her life. Sam sat back.
“So,” she said, trying to lighten the air again, “Aunt Cate, are you going to see Seth again?”
“Maybe.” Cate pursed her lips. “We talked about it. But no more roses and candlelit restaurants.”
“Oh boy. Did you tell him that?” Marlowe looked horrified.
“I told him I’d think about it, you know.”
Marlowe groaned. “That’s basically a maybe, which men interpret as no.”
That made Sam laugh. “She’s not wrong, Aunt Cate. Are you sure there’s nothing there worth exploring?”
Aunt Cate looked offended. “You two act like I’ve forgotten how to date.”
“Well,” Marlowe teased, “when was the last time?”
Cate’s eyebrows shot up. “Remember that date with Winston Price?”
“Okay, maybe that was a trial run.” Marlowe raised her hands, palms up.
They all burst out laughing and Sam relaxed, grateful for the laughter.
They talked for another hour and covered just about everything, including Sam’s plans for a larger garden out back, Marlowe making another appointment with Dr. Lowe and Izzy’s nursery plans.
They were never at a loss for words, and Sam reveled in the feeling of family.
By the time Aunt Cate stood to go upstairs, Sam was ready to head up too.
Marlowe made the rounds to turn off the lights. Then they all trooped up the stairs.
At her bedroom door, Cate hugged both of them. “You girls always make me feel better.”
“You don’t have to cancel Monty in your mind to let someone else in.” Sam knew their uncle would want that for their aunt.
Cate looked at her for a long moment, eyes soft. “You know, dear, you are so right.”
When the door closed behind her aunt, Sam turned back to find Marlowe staring at her.
“What?” Sam asked.
Marlowe hesitated. “You’re okay with this, right? I mean, if I turn out to be the one?”
Sam crossed her arms. “After my last day in the hospital nursery, yes. Definitely. Why do you ask?” Why was she questioning this?
Marlowe tilted her head. “And what about you? What’s next for you?”
Sam had thought about this a lot. She was a woman who had to have a plan. “Throw myself into my agency, I guess. I have a new client and we’re working on branding. That should be fun. The staff is excited.”
“Sounds great. But maybe you should make an appointment with Dr. Lowe too. You know, sort out your feelings.” Marlowe gave her a tight hug and disappeared into her room.
What was her sister talking about? Sam was too tired to think about that now. When she got into her room, she opened her laptop and stared at her design proposal. Next steps? She started typing.
Maybe this was her new role, being her sister’s support. And for the first time in a long while, that felt like enough.