Chapter Twenty-Eight #2
Placing my cell back on the nightstand, I lie there for what seems like hours, listening to it vibrate repeatedly until it finally stops.
Then, I wait and wait for it to vibrate again.
Nothing.
Panic washes over me.
Maybe he has given up?
I turn and pick up my cell, pressing the button to activate the screen, but there is nothing. It’s black. I press the power button, but a battery sign indicates it’s dead. A quick scan of the nightstand tells me Joseph plugged my charger into the wall, so I quickly push the cord into my phone.
I know I need to wait for a while, but I become impatient after a minute or so, so I press the power button. The screen flashes to life, and I lie on my back with my phone above my face, staring at the screen.
The panic rises, and tears form in the corner of my eyes.
The screen fades to black, and I stare at it, imploring it to ring.
Nothing.
Even though I hate him right now and know I can never forgive him, I don’t want him to give up on me. As crazy as that sounds, the fact that he’s calling makes me feel better.
I close my eyes, and it forces the tears to fall onto the pillow.
The pillow that covers my necklace, the one he gave me in Paris. The one that’s engraved with our initials in a love heart and the words that mean so much, Until the End of Time.
That’s when I give up all hope.
Two lives—so polar opposite of each other.
My eyes flash open when the phone vibrates again. Right there in front of me is his face, and with that image, I’m instantly calm. I smile and hold the phone in both hands to my chest, almost embracing it.
I know I must be losing my mind!
How can a call from him bring such relief?
My body relaxes, knowing he hasn’t given up on me.
My cell continues to vibrate, but the time between the calls is becoming longer and longer. Each time I think he’ll stop, he proves me wrong by calling again. I know I’m probably torturing myself, but it’s the only thing I have left of him.
A knock sounds on my door, and I look up, placing the phone under my pillow.
Joseph walks in with a tray, then sits next to me. “How are you feeling?” He hands me a glass of water and two tablets.
I look at him and frown. “Do I need to take that?”
“Yes, you do, sweetie,” he says. “I’m sorry, Dee. What happened last night with the paparazzi—”
“Not your fault. It’s mine. I should’ve realized they’d come after me once the news of our split was leaked.
I’m sorry they came here, and I fully understand if you want me to move out because of the attention that will be focused on your home now,” I say.
I know how much Joseph likes his privacy, so he would not be keen to have twenty reporters camped on his front doorstep.
“Don’t be daft. You’re not going anywhere. No one is coming into the condo other than people we know. So don’t worry about your safety or your privacy. We’ve got you, Dee,” Joseph replies, placing the tray on the end of the bed.
“So, you haven’t told me how you’re feeling,” he asks, looking at the nearly empty IV bag.
I think through the fog in my head for a moment and know I feel a little better. Not great, but maybe good enough that I might be able to make it downstairs to watch some television.
“Yeah, better. My stomach is damn sore, though. It feels like I’ve done a heavy-duty round of sit-ups. Oh, and I really need to wee,” I admit.
“Well, thanks for that final little tidbit of oversharing. But what I meant was… how are you feeling emotionally?” I swallow, take in a deep breath, and then let it out slowly. “That good, eh?” He takes my hand in his.
“Do you think I might be able to have a shower?” I ask, trying to avoid the topic of my emotional state.
He smirks and chuckles. “Please do. I think a shower would be a great idea.”
“Sorry. I know I’m disgusting. I can feel it.”
“Well, if Danny did to me what that arsehole has done to you, I’d be the same,” Joseph says, and I half-smile. “Do you want to shower now? I can get Danny to unplug your drip if you like?” I nod slowly. “Okay, I’ll chat with Danny and be right back.” He stands and walks out.
Slowly, I move my legs out of bed. Princess is on the floor, jumping on my legs, so I pet her furry head. Footsteps sound in the hall, and Joseph and Danny walk in, hand in hand.
“Hey Dee, how are you feeling?” Danny asks as he steps over and fiddles with the drip in my hand. He’s so gentle, I can’t help but smile.
“I’m okay. A bit weak, but at least I can keep my eyes open,” I reply as he sits on the bed beside me.
“That’s good. Joseph tells me you want a shower?” Danny inquires with kind eyes. “I think that’s a great idea, but you’ll need to be careful. You’re still weak. Your body is in recovery mode. Make sure not to have the shower too hot,” Danny states sternly.
“How do you know about all of this medical stuff?” I ask.
“I used to be a nurse. My family comes from a line of medical professionals. I gave it up because it wasn’t for me. I’m the black sheep of the family for not continuing in medicine like everyone else. But I’m happy, even if they aren’t,” he replies with a slight chuckle.
“Well, I’m glad you’re happy. Everyone should be happy and do what they want in life.” I go to stand and wobble slightly.
“Take it easy.” Joseph takes hold of my arm to steady me.
“Maybe after your shower, you can come downstairs, and we can watch Thor. A good lusting after Chris Hemsworth is the best medicine,” Danny says.
“Oooh, I’d like that.”
Danny stands and walks toward the door. “I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”
Joseph helps me walk to the ensuite, then lets me go, but stays to watch and ensure I don’t fall. He must see how exhausted I am and leans in, turning on the faucet and waiting for it to reach the right temperature.
“Okay, you going to be all right?” he asks, looking at me, concerned.
I fake a smile as I really don’t know how much longer I can hold myself up.
I wish there were a bath.
“I’m fine, thanks, Joseph. You’ve been amazing.”
He leans in, kisses my forehead, and walks out, closing the ensuite door.
I exhale, trying to hold myself up and remove my shirt, but I’m having trouble lifting my arms above my head.
They’re so damn heavy. I make a few attempts and am exhausted already, so I slump against the wall, making a thud when my body hits it.
The door creaks open, and Joseph peeks inside.
He sees me struggling to stand, silently walks in, and lifts me, holding me to him.
“Oh, Dee. What have you done to yourself?” he mumbles under his breath as I struggle to stop panting from exhaustion. “Okay, you need a shower, and I need to help, so I’m sorry if this is embarrassing, but I can’t see any other option.”
He leans me against the basin, and I try to hold myself up as he grabs hold of his shirt, pulling it off over his head.
I forgot how ripped he is. He continues to get completely undressed, then takes the hem of my shirt and pulls it up over my head.
It’s hard for me to hold my arms up long enough for him to take it off, but somehow we manage.
Joseph pulls at my underwear, dragging them down my legs to the floor, then our bodies connect as he holds me to him.
“How are you doing?” he asks.
I feel every inch of him, but there is no connection.
No awkward weirdness.
No attraction.
Nothing.
Simply a friend helping a friend.
“I can’t wait to get in there. I need this so badly.”
“In we get,” he says, picking me up off the floor so I don’t have to walk.
Joseph slowly turns me around so I’m under the water spray, and the feeling is amazing. He rests my feet on the tiles, and I wrap my arms around his neck loosely. I move my head under the water and let it caress my face and hair.
Then my mind starts to drift as I remember the first time I had a shower with him.
The thought of his incredibly firm hands on my body.
How he massaged my scalp, bringing goose bumps to my skin.
My chest tightens, and I squeeze my eyes shut to force the memory out, but it doesn’t work. All my senses are attuned to him. All my body wants is his hands on me.
“Hey,” Joseph says, bringing me back into the now.
I fling open my eyes and look at him. I can’t believe how perfect this man has been. A girl couldn’t ask for better support than Joseph.
He brings his hand to my face and wipes a tear I didn’t know had fallen. “I will always be here for you. I love you, Dee.”
And hearing that.
Those three little words.
Words I wanted to hear the most from that one man.
And knowing now that I never will.
I break down.
Tears explode, and I sob into my hands.
Joseph pulls me closer to his chest, and I wrap my arms around him as my legs go weak. He holds me longer than I thought possible, and eventually, my sobs subside to a slow trickle and unsteady breathing.
Joseph takes out the body wash and cleans me thoroughly as I stand there in a daze, just blinking.
He then washes my hair, and the tears start again when he massages my scalp.
Once he’s satisfied I’m clean, he guides me out of the shower and takes a fluffy white towel, wrapping it around his waist. Then he wraps one around my hair before drying me with another.
“Dee, can you promise me something?” I look at him and nod once. “You need to eat. Once you’re dressed, I’m taking you downstairs, and you’ll sit with Danny while I make something.”
I nod because there is no point in arguing.
Once I am dressed in comfortable pajamas, he sits me down and blow-dries my hair.
Danny is sitting on the edge of my bed, waiting for us. I can’t help but wonder how Danny feels about Joseph being in there with me, but their relationship seems solid enough, so I don’t give it a second thought.
“C’mon, let’s get you downstairs and on the lounge. Chris Hemsworth is calling your name,” Danny says, wrapping his arm around me.
I manage to sneak my cell into my pajama pocket, so I’ll know when he calls.
I know it’s ridiculous.
Stupid.
Beyond logic.
But I need it.
I need to know he still cares enough to call.
I won’t answer, but it’s enough of a distraction that it helps me to put one step in front of the other right now.