Chapter 24
REESE
My cheeks were flushed, my hair was a disheveled mess, and I looked exactly what I was.
Fucked. I’d scurried into the bathroom so Chase could answer the door to his office.
Looking in the mirror now, there was no doubt I’d made the right choice.
I was even more certain of that when I heard Samantha’s voice.
Great, the VP of human resources had just walked into Chase’s office, and it probably still reeked of sex.
The serenity I’d felt not three minutes ago was long gone—replaced by its evil friend, paranoia.
Were we loud?
Was I loud?
Did the whole office hear?
What was I doing? I’d set ground rules and promptly broken them the first time Chase pushed a little. Had I learned nothing from my mistakes?
Feeling vulnerable, I tiptoed to the door and pressed my ear against it.
“What were you doing in here?” Samantha asked.
“I was on the phone.”
Her voice sounded suspicious. I pictured her squinting her eyes as she spoke. “With whom?”
“A supplier. Not that it’s any of your business. What do you need, Sam?”
Her voice became more distant, and I had to strain to hear. She must have walked to the windows or the seating area on the other side of the room. “Detective Balsamo called me this morning. She said she’s been trying to reach you.”
“I’ve been busy.”
“That’s why I’m here asking the question. It’s not like you to blow off anything related to Peyton. There was a time when they couldn’t get you out of the police station, you were so involved.”
“That was the same time when I blew off my work and spent most nights drunk. Not sure I want to go back to those days.”
“I get that. I do. But I wanted to make sure nothing else was going on. You seem…different lately.”
“Different? How?”
“I don’t know. More jovial, I suppose.”
“Jovial? What am I? A jolly old fat guy who rides around in a sleigh?”
“Something’s going on with you. I can tell. Are you seeing someone new?”
The room went quiet for a minute, and I wondered how he was going to respond.
A part of me wanted him to say he was seeing someone, just to hear him declare it out loud to one of his closest friends.
Then again, he was talking to the vice president of human resources at my place of employment—probably not the best person to make that declaration to.
“Not that it’s any of your business, but yes, I am seeing someone.”
“Someone you’ve gone out with more than once?”
“I’m not talking about this with you.”
“When do I get to meet her?”
“When I’m ready.”
“So that means you expect her to be around a while?”
Chase huffed. “Did you have any actual business you came here to discuss? Because I was in the middle of something important when you interrupted.”
“Fine. But you love my interruptions, and you know it.”
I heard footsteps move closer followed by the click of the doorknob, but then it went quiet again without the door closing. Samantha’s voice was serious the next time she spoke, and for some reason, I visualized her stopping and looking back over her shoulder.
“I’m glad you’re moving on, Chase. I hope it works out and I get to meet her.” She paused for a second and then spoke softly. “Maybe it’s time you take down the shrine, too.”
I waited a few minutes before hesitantly cracking opening the door. Chase had opened his windows to the outside and was staring at the advertisement on the building across the street.
He didn’t turn to face me when he spoke. “Sorry about that.”
“Things went too far today. We shouldn’t have…” I trailed off.
He was quiet. I assumed his mood shift was because of what I’d overheard. Even though I’d never had one, I imagined talking about a dead ex-fiancée was kind of a buzz kill. So he surprised me when he turned and said, “I want this.”
“Sex in the office?”
The corner of his lip twitched. “That, too. But that’s not what I meant.”
“No?”
He shook his head. “I want this. Me and you. Sam just came in here to talk about Peyton. The lead detective on the case called her, too. It’s time for her annual call where she tells me they’re still working the case but nothing new has come up.”
“I’m sorry. She called you last week, right? That must be hard.”
He nodded. “It was always hard. I’m not saying it’s easy now.
But normally I go to a dark place after the mention of Peyton’s case.
I pretty much expected to feel miserable after Sam walked out the door—waited for it to hit me even.
Took a deep breath while I was waiting, and you know what happened? ”
“What?”
“I smelled you on me.”
I blinked a few times. “I don’t understand.”
He shrugged. “Neither do I. But I fucking love smelling you on me.”
He looked so sincere, even though it was a bizarre thing to say.
“And smelling me made you feel better?”
His grin was lopsided. “Uh-huh.”
“Okay then.” I fought a blush. “I really should get back to work.”
“Dinner tonight?”
“I’d like that. How about if I make you something at my place?”
“Even better. Then I don’t have to wait to get you home to get you naked.”
***
Over the years, I’d learned to accept my neuroses.
Checking under the bed, behind the shower curtain, and inside every closet had become part of my daily routine.
I didn’t try to change it. I’d let it become part of who I was instead of letting it define me.
Plenty of women were extra precautious…especially living in New York City.
Yet, as I was about to enter my apartment with Chase right behind me, I wished like hell that my compulsions could take the night off.
I unlocked the top lock, and my key hovered at the next one.
Deciding to just get it over with before going inside, I spun around and confessed right there in the hallway.
“I have a routine when I get home.”
Chase’s eyebrows drew together. “Okay…”
“I told you I have issues with safety. I check behind the shower curtain, open all the closet doors, check under the bed and couch.” I paused and chewed on the nail of my pointer finger.
“I have a routine, and I do it in a certain order. And I do it at least twice—sometimes more if I don’t feel calm after the second time.
Although most days it’s only two passes. ”
He said nothing for a few seconds, his eyes questioning. Finding I was dead serious, he nodded. “Show me the routine, and after you’re finished with the first pass, I’ll take the second.”
I had no idea what I’d expected him to say, but that answer couldn’t have made me happier. He didn’t poke fun or belittle my safety concerns. Instead he was going to pitch in. Pushing up on my tippy toes, I planted a sweet kiss on his lips.
“Thank you.”
Tallulah, of course, was waiting with green eyes glowing in the dark. If I ever had a house, I could put the beast in the window to scare away children at Halloween. I flicked on the lights, and Ugly Kitty stared at Chase as she licked her lips.
I know, Ugly Kitty, I know. He’s pretty delectable.
“Jesus, she’s even uglier in person,” he said.
I scooped Tallulah from the top of the couch and kneeled down to check beneath it, beginning my rounds. Chase followed quietly along. After my last checkpoint, I turned to him. “That’s it.”
He set the bottle of wine he was holding down on the kitchen counter and took Kitty from my arms.
“I’ll be back.”
Watching him go through my routine was comical.
He must have thought holding the kitty was part of it.
I didn’t bother to tell him because…well, because oddly, I really liked watching the oversized man walk around and check my closets for prospective intruders while holding a hairless cat.
It certainly wasn’t a sight you see every day.
Finishing, he bent down, let Tallulah go, and walked into the kitchen where he began to open my drawers, looking for something. Finding a bottle opener, he spoke as he unscrewed the cork. “How’d I do?”
“Perfect. You’re hired. You can come sweep my apartment for criminals every night, if you like.”
He pulled the cork from the bottle with a loud pop. “Be careful. I might take you up on that.”
Since my refrigerator was even emptier than I’d thought, we ordered in Chinese food. I got the kung pao chicken, and Chase chose shrimp lo mein. We sat on the floor in the living room, eating out of containers with chopsticks and swapping meals from time to time.
“Do you think Sam knows?” I asked.
“About us?”
“Yes.”
“No. She’s not subtle. If she knew, she’d say it.”
“How do you think she would feel if she did know? Considering I’m an employee and all.”
“Doesn’t matter. She doesn’t like it, I’ll make her change the policy.”
“From prohibited relationships to screwing in the office strongly encouraged?”
He grinned. “Absolutely.”
I’d been thinking about the things I overhead in the bathroom all afternoon.
While the conversation was obviously not meant for my ears, I couldn’t unhear it.
Part of my hesitancy with jumping into this relationship full force with Chase—even aside from him being my boss—was wondering where his relationship with Peyton had left him.
Whether he could truly move on. What shrine had Sam been referring to?
I’d been in his house, and nothing had struck me as unusual.
I looked into Chase’s eyes when I spoke. “I overheard some of your conversation with Sam today from the bathroom.”
He swallowed his mouthful of food. “Okay.”
“Can I ask you something that’s probably none of my business?”
He set down his carton on the coffee table. “What’s on your mind?”
“Are you…able to move on?”
He’d told me he wanted to try. But trying and actually putting the past behind you were two very different things. I should know.
“To be honest, the last seven years, I had no idea I wasn’t moving on. Thought what I was doing was moving on.”
“You mean sleeping with women?”
He shook his head. “Yeah. I was standing in place a long time. Not letting go.”
“But you think you’re ready to move on now?”