Chapter 11 #3
I really need to visit my parents. I haven’t seen them since Christmas, and that’s much too long.
The next one is my entire family. Mom, Dad, me, Alyssa, Gigi. Then there’s one of my dad making faces at my mom. Another of my sisters squirting each other with their water bottles. Mom laughing. Me laughing. All five of us standing and flexing our muscles like we’re bodybuilders.
There’s one of me with Alyssa and Gigi dressed up for Halloween, standing in the entrance to the corn maze, and another with our faces painted for a football game.
Theo is conspicuously absent in all the photos, but I know he was there for every single one of these moments.
“Obviously, I also have a bunch of the two of us,” he says. “But I thought it might be weird for me to give those to you. I can, if you want them; I just didn’t want to be … too forward, I guess? I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
I flip to the last photo, and this one is of Theo and me. I hold it up. “You missed one.”
We’re leaning against his truck in the photo. He has one arm around me, and the other is raised to take a selfie. He’s looking directly at the camera, his face boyish and handsome, but I’m not. Instead, my head is thrown back in laughter, eyes squinting, mouth open in a wide smile.
I can’t remember what he said that made me laugh so hard, but I do remember the moment. I’d ridden my bike over to my grandmother’s house—she only lived a couple of miles away from my parents—and I’d texted Theo to come and pick me up, claiming it was too hot to ride home.
Probably I just wanted an excuse to see him, not that I ever needed one. Hockey was the only thing that ever kept us apart. When he wasn’t practicing or traveling for games, we were pretty much inseparable.
“Sorry,” Theo says over my shoulder. “I didn’t know that one was there.”
“It’s okay,” I say. “I’m glad it is.”
“That’s your grandma’s house, right?”
I run my finger over the edge of the photo. “Yeah, it is.”
“You made me come and pick you up,” he says.
“I asked you to. I didn’t make you do anything.”
He chuckles. “You could have. I think I would have driven to California to pick you up if you’d wanted me to.”
My grip tightens on the photos. He would have. Which is why losing him was so painful. Because we went from that kind of devotion … to nothing. Basically overnight.
“How is your grandma?” Theo asks, and my chest tightens, a sharp ache running from my heart down into my gut.
“She passed away,” I say, my voice catching the slightest bit. “Last year.”
He’s quiet for a beat before he says, “Becca, I’m really sorry.”
I shrug and will myself not to get emotional. Losing my grandmother to Alzheimer’s was one of the hardest things I’ve experienced. She was diagnosed my junior year of high school, but she lived close enough that as long as we checked on her daily, it wasn’t too bad. Not at first.
But her disease progressed quickly. It wasn’t long before she needed full-time care, first at home, then eventually in a memory care facility.
I slip the photos back into the envelope and close it up. “Thank you for these,” I say. “It was nice of you to bring them.” I tilt my head toward the nurses’ tent, just on the other side of the grass. “I’m going to go put them with my stuff.”
I expect Theo to head back to his tent, but he waits while I stick the photos in my bag, then move back to the track, ignoring the very pointed look Lexie gives me as I go.
“Can I walk with you?” he asks.
“Of course,” I say. I tilt my head in Lexie’s direction. “But just know I’m making an enemy by saying yes.”
He tsks. “I should get you a playoff jacket. That would really make her mad.”
I chuckle even as my face heats, a jolt of sensation racing down my spine. Theo’s only making a joke, but he knows as well as I do that only wives and girlfriends get playoff jackets.
A few yards in front of us, Carter and another teammate are walking on opposite sides of a teenager wearing a Jaguars t-shirt. Carter seems to be leaning down, like he’s listening intently to whatever the kid is saying.
“So that’s one of the conversations someone signed up for?” I ask Theo, motioning to his brother.
“It is,” he says. “People make a donation in exchange for one or two laps of walking and talking with their player of choice. My slots don’t start until this afternoon.”
“Right in the heat of the day,” I say. “Lucky you.”
“Maybe I’ll text you and ask for a ride,” he says, shooting me a teasing grin.
“Very funny. Though I think the firefighters will do a good job of keeping everyone cool.” I look over at him one more time.
He’s in gym shorts and a Jaguars t-shirt, sunglasses pushed up into his hair.
It’s not quite bright enough for them yet, which means I can see those blue, blue eyes that used to be my undoing.
“Theo, if you have to walk later this afternoon, you don’t have to walk with me now. I can go catch up with Mia.”
He pushes his hands into his pockets. “I know I don’t have to,” he says, his expression shifting into something bashful, almost shy. “But what if I just want to?”