Chapter 17
Summer sat in the grounded HERO Force chopper, Razorback tending her wounds.
The rest of the team was outside in the snow-covered clearing where they’d landed, a twenty-minute flight from AGL, giving them privacy while he examined her.
Luke had already been taken care of, the gash on his face requiring stitches while they were still in the air.
She felt like she’d been flattened by a steamroller, her side aching and her face throbbing where Walsh had hit her, but Razorback didn’t think her ribs were broken. He moved from checking her torso to caring for the wounds on her face.
It’s not like anything can be done anyway.
She bit back a sigh. She was emotionally exhausted, not physically broken, and she didn’t like the entire team going out of their way so Razorback could pronounce her bruised.
It was still fiercely cold outside, the chopper being pushed and bullied by the wind even sitting on the ground, and she wanted the men to be as warm and comfortable as she was.
Razorback dug in his medical bag and her curious stare took in his heavily scarred features.
She was guessing he’d been badly burned, but didn’t want to be rude and ask for details.
He must have been handsome once, the strong lines of his jaw and cheeks speaking to a classic male beauty.
He had medium-brown skin with patches of lighter brown on his face and hands, which she guessed were from skin grafts.
He didn’t look up from tending her wounds. “It was a roadside bomb.”
“Excuse me?”
He met her eyes, his a rich mix of brown, green, and gold. “I was carrying an oxygen tank for a patient.”
She winced, the mental image all too clear. “I’m sorry for staring.”
“It’s natural to be curious.”
She was definitely curious, and not just about Razorback. Now that the rest of the team had arrived, she could clearly see many of them were missing limbs, and one young man had a horrific Y-shaped scar covering one side of his face.
Razorback gently pressed on her cheekbones and pain radiated outward, making her inhale sharply. “Sorry about that. I don’t think it’s broken, but definitely sore. You also have a mild concussion.”
After everything she’d been through, the bumps and bruises seemed like the least of her worries. What had begun with a devastating explosion on the testing floor had ended with her fighting for her life, and very nearly losing.
She watched him work in silence. When she’d first read the newspaper article about HERO Force, she’d made a handful of assumptions about these men that she now knew weren’t true.
They didn’t have God complexes. They were highly skilled former soldiers, here to help people like her. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“The men of HERO Force all seem to have…” She struggled for the right word. “Problems.”
He furrowed his brow. “Like what?”
“Uh, well, I noticed one gentleman with a prosthetic arm, and another with a noticeable scar on his cheek, and a whole bunch of smaller ones.” She was already sorry she’d brought it up.
Razorback had an intense look on his face like he’d just realized she wasn’t on his side, after all.
She persevered, unsure as she did if it was wise to do so.
“And there was another man in a wheelchair, which seemed odd on a helicopter, but I guess really why would that seem strange—”
“What are you trying to say? We’re not good enough for you?”
Her mouth dropped open. “Oh, no! That’s not what I meant at all.”
He laughed, a rich belly laugh that surprised her. He pointed at her face. “I had you for a minute there.”
She rolled her eyes. “You jerk. Do you know how bad you made me feel for asking?”
“I couldn’t resist. You should see your face.”
Relieved, she shook her head. “So I’m not imagining it.”
“No, it’s a real thing. I think of us as the shattered SEALs. Each of us with our own story, each of us with our own scars. Mine are just more visible than some.”
“How did you all get together?”
“We were recruited by Mac, though I dare you to try to get a straight answer out of him as to why he did it. Guilt, maybe. I’m really not sure. But I can tell you one thing. This job has given me my life back.”
“How so?”
“I acted like losing my face was the same thing as losing my life. I’m a doctor and I wasn’t even practicing. A soldier with nothing to guard. It’s like I was sitting in my own pool of vomit, waiting for things to get better. They never did.”
Luke was part of this team of broken men, yet he had no scars on the outside that she could see. She opened her mouth and closed it again.
Don’t ask an honest question if you don’t want an honest answer.
But she did want to know, even if it was difficult to hear. Luke had endeared himself to her greatly. If he was hurting, she wanted to know why. “What’s wrong with Luke?”
“Can’t say as I know. I heard him and Mac talking once about Afghanistan. It was Wiseman’s last tour. Whatever it was that got him, that was where it happened. But you should probably ask him yourself if you really want to know.”
“My brother was on that tour with him. Edward didn’t come back.
” She shook her head. So much damage, so much loss.
Luke seemed so strong, so self-assured, it was hard to imagine he was struggling with his own demons.
“You’re sure there’s something? There aren’t any healthy, well-adjusted men around here? ”
“I don’t think so. It’s like every guy on the force is carrying fifty invisible rocks on his back, and once you get to know him, he’ll show you every last one.”
She liked this man, liked his genuine nature and his pragmatic ways. “What’s your real name?”
He held out his hand. “Ian Rhodes.”
She shook it, noting the uneven texture of his skin beneath her fingers.
“Can I give you a word of advice, Summer?”
“Sure.”
“You can’t fix him.”
“Who?”
“I’m not saying he can’t be fixed, just that you can’t do it for him.”
She frowned. “I wasn’t planning on fixing anybody.”
He smiled, those eyes radiating a platonic warmth. “Sure you were. That’s human nature, too. Wanting to help. Wanting to make things better for the people we care about.” He zipped up his medical bag. “But the only person who can fix Luke, is Luke.”
He opened the door, flurries dancing in on the breeze, and closed it behind him.
The people we care about.
Were her feelings that obvious to those around her? Her eyes followed a snowflake to the floor, watching as it seemed to disappear, melting into a tiny speck of water.
She loved him. She could see that now. Maybe she’d loved him for years, since he’d first made her smile and shared his quirky sense of humor from the other side of the world.
It wasn’t the kind of love that meant they were supposed to be together, but that made it shine brighter still. Luke was like a ray of light that crossed her own in the darkness. They might not be focused on the same things, but she would embrace his gentle heart for as long as she might have him.