Chapter 36
The news report was long over, Selena asleep on the couch with her head in Jackie’s lap.
The conversation Jackie had been dreading since Selena was born had gone better than she expected.
She hadn’t even lied, though she’d left plenty of the story out, including Doug’s name.
It would tide the girl over until she was older and a more detailed accounting was required.
She stroked her daughter’s hair. Selena had been disappointed to learn Razorback wasn’t actually her father, which took Jackie by surprise. Selena and Razorback had gotten off to a rocky start, but they seemed to have forged a bond along the way that was stronger than Jackie realized.
Good friends were easy to make in times of great difficulty, which also might explain why Jackie felt as strongly about Razorback as she did. They’d been through so much together in such a short period of time.
And in time, I’ll forget all about him.
She doubted that was true, but she wanted to believe it just the same. There was a knock at the door. “Come in,” she said, figuring Jessa saw her light on and knew she was awake. But it was Razorback who entered, and Jackie’s stomach pitched.
“I hope you don’t mind. Jax told me I could come on up.” He wore a black shirt fit close to his chest, accentuating his wide shoulders and muscular frame.
Her cheeks heated, her pulse picking up speed. “I thought you went back to New York.”
“Missed my flight.” He moved to stand in front of the couch, staring at Selena. “Is she ever a sight for sore eyes.” He leaned in, stroking her hair just as Jackie had done. “I was so worried. How is she?”
“Pretty good, considering everything she went through. We’ll have to see how she is after a few days.”
“And how are you?” He sat on the end of the couch past Selena’s feet, his arm along the back of it.
“Honestly? Exhausted.”
“Me, too.” He looked away and sighed heavily. “I missed my flight on purpose.”
She held her breath. Had he come back for her?
Calm down. You don’t know that. It might be a different reason.
She worked to keep her voice normal. “Why?”
“On the news tonight, they reported I’m Selena’s father.”
So, he hadn’t come back for her at all. He was regretting his decision to let her use his name on the birth certificate. “I know. I’m sorry about that.”
“Nothing to be sorry for. That’s why we did it, right? To keep her away from McGrath.” He chuckled. “I have some explaining to do to my mama, though.”
“So you’re all right if we leave it?”
“Of course.”
She exhaled a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “Selena saw it, too. I had to get crafty and explain the truth without telling her about Doug specifically.”
“How’d that go?”
“Pretty well. She was disappointed it wasn’t you.”
“Really?”
She nodded. “Maybe you two can keep in touch. Write letters or something.” Just because she didn’t get to keep Razorback didn’t mean her daughter had to lose him, too.
He shook his head. “I’m not a very good pen pal.”
She tried to hide her disappointment. She felt stupid for bringing it up. Clearly, the time she and Selena had spent with him meant far less to him than it had to her. “Oh. Okay.”
“Are you pissed?”
She shrugged. “No, of course not. Why would I be pissed?”
He laughed. “You are so pissed.”
“Fine.” She glared at him. “I was hoping you’d want to keep in touch with her, but that’s all.”
“That’s all you were hoping for?”
She wanted so much more, but damned if she was going to let him know it. “Yes!”
“Oh. Well, I was hoping I’d get to see Selena when I’m in town for our dates.” He smiled.
Had she heard him correctly? Was he asking what she thought he was asking? “Our dates?”
“Yeah. You want to go out sometime? Maybe catch a movie?”
She reached over Selena and smacked his arm. “You ass! You made me think you didn’t want to see me again.”
He laughed again. “Gotcha.”
“You are not funny, mister,” she said, kicking his thigh.
“Oh yes, I am.”
She kicked him again, harder this time, and Selena awoke. With sleepy eyes, she looked from one to the other. “Razorback!” She sat up, moving into his arms for a tight squeeze.
“Hi, sweetheart,” he said. Jackie’s heart warmed at the sight of the two of them together.
Selena leaned back. “I know you’re not really my father.”
He nodded. “That’s right.”
“But can I tell people you are?”
A flash of emotion crossed his features, and he shot a questioning look at Jackie.
It was the first time she was being asked to share her daughter.
“You definitely can, kiddo,” she said. This was going to change things between them, almost as if Selena really was his daughter.
Yet she didn’t feel scared or anxious or worried.
Razorback would be there for them in any way they needed him to be. “You definitely can.”