Chapter 14
Stepping back into their apartment, Riley finally with them, should have been a special moment, instead, Liz dreads what is to come.
He will need constant supervision and assistance: someone to change his bandages, cook his meals, administer his medications, make sure he is taken care of in every sense of the word, allowing his body and mind the time it needs to heal.
All of which will be easier said than done.
Mikey, Alex and Tyler refuse to tell her what happened with Scott, but they won’t be able to help with Riley as much as any of them would like, leaving Liz to be his caretaker.
For now, at least, she has Mikey. He was the one who pushed Riley across the base in a wheelchair, leading the small amount of conversation while she walked silently behind, carrying a large bag stuffed with medical supplies.
“Alright, I need to get out of this fucking thing,” Riley groans the moment the door to the apartment is closed behind them.
Liz watches him carefully, not wanting to intervene and upset him anymore than she already has.
On shaky arms, he pushes himself up out of the chair, Mikey sticking close just in case he goes down.
“I’m just going to get the supplies set up in his room,” Liz says before darting from the living room, happy to have an excuse to leave.
Wasting no time, she pulls out rolls of gauze, tape, and various medicines, laying them out in order of when they need to be taken or changed.
She takes her good, sweet time making sure everything is set up perfectly––expertly organized to limit the amount of time she will need to spend taking care of him, allowing him the space he seems to need.
A pair of sweatpants and one of his looser fitting t-shirts is placed on the end of the bed along with the mask she already pulled out.
Liz double checks that the snacks are lined up within easy reach of the bed.
Before going back out to face the men, she slides the table drawer open.
Liz thinks better of it and slams it closed.
Seeing them happy will only make his anger toward her that much harder to accept.
“All set,” she says, striding back into the living room.
She walks right past where Riley is standing.
Being out of the wheelchair forces her to look up at him as she does.
He seemed so much smaller lying on that hospital bed that she almost forgot just how intimidating his size is.
“It’s getting kind of late. I set some clothes out if you want to help him change, but I’ve done all I can do, so I guess I will see you in bed? ” Liz asks, looking at Mikey.
His face flushes a deep shade of red, eyes full of fear looking at Riley.
The air in the room stills, like the universe is holding its breath, waiting to see what he will do.
Even with her back to him, Liz feels his eyes linger on her body.
Goosebumps pepper her skin when she hears the strained footsteps.
Trying her best to calm her wild nerves, she turns to face him.
Arms crossed and hip cocked to the side, she waits for him to find another reason to be mad at her.
“You two share a bed now?” he asks. His deep, gravely tone threatens to make her knees buckle. Riley takes another shaky step in her direction, wobbling slightly, not used to using his legs.
“Is there somewhere else I should be sleeping?” she asks, feigning innocence.
She forces herself to peel her eyes away, part of her wishing they could have left him in the hospital where he would be forced to lay down and focus on getting better.
That part only grows when he takes another step, more sure and confident, like her little attitude is making him ignore the pain.
“Jesus Christ, Liz! Are you trying to get me killed?” Mikey shouts from the other side of the room, keeping his distance from the storm brewing in front of him. “We share a room with a bunk bed. She’s on top of me, completely separate.”
Riley cocks an eyebrow at her, challenging Liz to come up with another smart ass comment. He winks so fast she isn’t sure if that is what he actually did or not before he turns to face his friend. “You have her on top of you?” Riley asks, not a hint of amusement in his voice.
“She was right. You do need to get into your damn bed. I am too tired to deal with your bullshit tonight,” he whines, leading Riley to the doorway. “Liz moved out and got it all set up for you, snacks, clothes and enough pillows to prop yourself in any position you could want.”
“She moved out?” he asks, slowly following Mikey to the room.
“Yeah. I told her not to, but you know how stubborn she is. Said we don’t know what they did to you and you should have your own space.”
Riley’s chest tightens when he catches Liz sneaking off to her room out of the corner of his eye.
When he steps into his own room, he has to restrain himself from going to her.
It’s clear the only thing on her mind when setting up the space was his comfort.
Mikey wasn’t lying, there are too many pillows carefully placed onto the bed, and although he hates to admit it, those will come as a huge help at night.
His favorite snacks are laid out next to the bed, placed within an arm’s reach. Tears spring to his eyes when he sees the mask sitting on top of the neatly folded clothes. She had put so much care and effort into making sure all his needs were met while he was a cranky asshole.
“Alright, I’m helping you change, don’t be weird about it,” Mikey says playfully, picking up the pile from the bed.
“I don’t need to,” he says, wincing while he shrugs the hospital gown off of his shoulders.
He’s left in just the teal pair of scrub pants he was allowed to wear in the infirmary and the hospital mask he wore to hide his face while being carted across the base.
With one shaky step after another, Riley makes his way to the bed.
Only when he reaches it does he let his friend help him in, groaning at the pain ripping through his shoulders when he lies back.
“It’s nice to have you back, man,” Mikey says, heading to his own room for the night.
“I assume Liz will be by in the morning to check on things and fawn over you for the rest of the day,” he says, walking to the door.
“Just do me a favor and actually rest. We all know you are a big tough guy and nothing can shake you, but that really fucking shook us. We need you back, man. Things have been happening and we need you in tip top shape to help handle it,” he adds.
Mikey steps out the door, closing it tightly behind him without another word.
The days after Riley’s return are the hardest yet. Liz spends her mornings making him breakfast and getting his medicines organized before the doctor comes to check on him. After her short gym session with Mikey, she is forced to be alone with Riley for the remainder of the day.
She cooks his meals and checks on his pain periodically throughout the day, never talking to him more than she has to.
Because he can’t be left alone, the rest of her time is spent dawdling around the apartment, trying to find anything she can to keep her mind busy.
The only time Riley speaks to her is to ask questions: How long was he gone, how many days has it been since they found him, why won’t she let him out of bed if he feels fine?
She goes to his room, ready to check his bandages and prepare his next round of meds, mentally prepared for their next awkward encounter.
It feels different this time. She can feel his eyes on her, tracking her every move.
“Are you ever going to fucking talk to me, princess?”
She flinches at his booming voice. The pills rattle in their bottles as her shaky hands continue their work.
“What do you want to talk about?” she asks, not caring about the tremble in her voice. Trying her best to keep the situation under control, she continues getting the supplies ready.
“I’m sorry,” he breathes.
“It’s alright. You are going through a lot right now,” she starts.
“No, it’s not alright, but that’s not what I mean.
I am so fucking sorry I left you. I should have stayed by your side and went to the hospital.
I was reckless and impulsive trying to make sure Dmitri was dead.
I wanted to make sure he couldn’t hurt you again, but I only made sure he did.
I fucked up, I know that. But I can’t stand you being this pissed at me.
Even when we found you and you fucking hated me, at least you would talk, make little smartass comments, yell at me if I did something you didn’t like, now you won’t even give me that much,” he shouts.
Liz turns to face him, finding his legs swung off the bed, trying to stand, and she rushes over. Placing her hands on his shoulders, she applies enough pressure to hold him down without hurting him. Tears roll down her face, falling into the space between them.
“I’m not mad at you.”
“Then why? Why are you treating me like you wish I never came back? Is it that guy you’ve been seeing?”
His words cut her to the very core. She had no idea he didn’t want the space she had been giving him.
“What? There is no guy,” she says, shaking her head, confused as to why he would ever think there was anyone but him.
“I don’t know what you went through while you were gone, but from how you acted when you woke up…
well, it seemed like you needed space from me. ”
“I didn’t mean it like that. You sitting across the room, refusing to even look in my direction, that hurt more than any wound he inflicted on me.”
“I never meant to hurt you, Ry.”
Hearing her whisper his name is all he can take. His hands grip her waist, pulling her against his chest. Strong hands slowly move across her back until a set of arms are holding her like they never want to let go.
“I was so scared. When we first got to you, I refused to let you go. My hand was wrapped around yours the entire twenty-six hours we flew home. The only reason I stopped was because they made me, but as soon as I let you go, the doubts started creeping in. I remembered every word you said that day, and how I felt once you guys got me out. I didn’t want to push anything with you.
I knew we would talk eventually, but that was never more important than your healing.
” Her hands move from his shoulders, gliding up his neck, under his mask until her fingers find his shaggy hair, scratching his scalp the way he loves.
The deep growl he lets out radiates through her chest.
“Baby, look at me,” Riley orders, loosening his grip, allowing Liz a small step back.
Tears rim her eyes as she does what he orders.
“Every word from my mouth was a lie to get him to let you go. I thought Mikey’s big mouth would have told you everything that happened after.
” His shimmering amber eyes drop to the long pink scar stretching across her neck.
“He said there were some things I needed to hear from you.” Her hands still, wondering if he will tell her everything their friend refused.
The warmth disappears from half of her body. Riley reaches up and pulls the mask from his face, gently tossing it aside. His hand finds its way to her face, cupping her cheek, his thumb gingerly rubbing back and forth.
“Did he tell you I cried when I thought I lost you?” he asks. “Or that I begged you not to die, begged you to stay with me?”
She nods against his hand.
“Did he tell you that I love you?”
Tears pour from her, unable to control it as she shakes her head.
“Good. I should have been in the hospital with you, I should have been there to tell you the moment you woke up. I love you, Liz.”
Sobs wrack her body hearing what she needed to hear for so long. Her arms wrap around his neck, pulling him into a tight hug as she cries into his shoulder. They stay like that, holding each other, crying tears of joy, refusing to let go until the sobs slow.
When they do, Riley pulls her face to his, placing gentle, loving kisses on her lips she is quick to return. A blaring alarm from across the room snaps them out of the moment. Placing a final deep kiss on his lips, Liz releases him so she can finish what she came to do.
As quickly as she can, she gathers his medication into a cup and rushes back to him, shoving it into his waiting hand, not looking away until he takes the pills. Back on schedule for the day, she helps him get nestled into bed, still insisting on rest so his body can heal.
Riley snatches her hand, not wanting her to leave now that he finally has her by his side once more. “Stay with me,” he pleads.
“If I do, will you behave? I know you’re in pain, even if you’re too macho to admit it,” she teases, poking him in the massive bruise covering half of his bicep.
“I will be good if you tell me everything that has been going on. Mikey won’t tell me shit and I’m really curious who you’re going to dinner with,” he says, anger simmering in his eyes. “Again apparently,” he adds, patting the bed next to him.
It sinks under her weight as she crawls in. Reaching down, she interlocks their fingers, holding his hand as tight as she did on the plane.
“First of all,” she starts, cupping his cheek and turning his head to face her.
Her lips brush his in a single kiss. When she pulls away she meets his eyes.
They are lighter, the happiest she has seen since he returned to her.
“I love you.” A smile tugs at her lips, Riley beaming next to her, lowering his head to kiss her again.
“Second, what the hell are you talking about?”
“I was in and out for a while, so I may not remember much, but some guy said he was taking you to dinner again. Fucker looked me in the eyes when he said it,” he grumbles, anger simmering in his eyes, only made worse by Liz giggling into his neck.
“Okay, I will tell you everything that’s happened, but it’s a very long story, so here’s what is going to happen.
I am going to go get us dinner, we are going to eat together just like we used to, and when we are done, I will explain,” she says, leaning in to kiss him, something she will never tire of. “Got it?”
“Yes ma’am,” he says with a wink, watching her scramble off the bed and disappear out the door.