Chapter 52 #2
“I know you’re an adult,” he cut me off, voice like ice, sharp with suppressed rage.
“You can make your own choices, live your own life.” His body was rigid, and each breath escaped him, brief and unsteady.
“But does it have to be like this, Tshabina? Running off with some man, staying out all night, sneaking back in the morning, ignoring my calls?” His eyes reddened.
“Was this how you were raised? By who?!”
And there it was—the dam finally breaking after years of silence. All the frustration and the ache he’d buried came spilling out.
His breathing grew ragged as he pushed the words at me like accusations. “Dad? Me? Or Mo—” he bit it off, tore off his glasses, and turned away. One hand dragged down his face as he tried to steady himself.
He wouldn’t even look at me.
The ache in my chest was unbearable. I gulped, shifted on the stairs, aching to reach him, to apologize. But not for what I’d done. Because even if time rewound, I’d still choose the same path.
I only wished he could understand.
But the truth that I’d hurt him was enough to shred me inside.
I watched his stiff back, twisting my fingers in agony. “Mas Bibu…” My voice quavered, cracking as I spoke his name.
“Since when?” he asked in a low tone.
“Mas—”
“Since when?”
I bit my inner lip at his icy tone. “Zioh and I… We’ve been close again since shortly after he returned here,” I blurted, desperation lacing my voice. “Mas, I—I wanted to tell you, but I—”
“You’ve gone too far, Dek.” His voice was hoarse, low, his eyes blazing with rage and disappointment as he finally turned to me.
And my tears fell.
Weak. Weak. Weak.
Tsabinu brushed past me, heading towards the stairs, but I caught his arm. A sudden surge hit like a lightning strike, draining the strength from my legs. I couldn’t let him walk away. Not like this. Not with anger. Not with the fact that he hated me. Not leaving me the way everyone else had.
“Mas, p-please, don’t be angry with me,” I begged, “Listen—”
“What’s there to explain?” he shot back, vibrating with suppressed fury. “How did you end up sleeping with Zioh?” His eyes burned. “Or what?”
“Mas…” My throat rasped, my tears unstoppable. “You know what he means to me…” My voice faltered, but I pressed on and clung to him. “And you know what happened to all of us back then…” I choked on my sobs. “It wasn’t easy for me either…”
The memories clawed at me. “You’ve realized too, Zioh, Zeraiah, they changed after Mama Nadine died.” I sniffled. “Something happened to them, Mas, something I can’t just ignore. Z-Zioh i-is—”
My voice faltered too much to continue, so I swallowed hard, tried again, and my damn tears were streaming. “Mas… Zioh is—”
Before I could finish, Tsabinu yanked his hand free. His gaze bored into me. And in that moment, I realized I had failed again. “Not just them,” he cut in, his voice low and taut with pain.
“Us too.” He paused, making me realize how much his body was shuddering. “We’ve changed, Dek.” The words caught in his throat. “Whether you realize it or not.”
He shook his head and slashed through me when his words came again. “But it seems… they’re the only ones who matter to you.”
With that, he turned, walking away, leaving me trembling and bawling my eyes out, and I could only stare at the rigid back of my brother.
? ── * ── ?
The next morning, I drove with one hand, while the other pressed a cold compress against my swollen eye. I had spent the entire night crying. I could barely remember the last time Tsabinu and I fought—let alone him raising his voice at me.
I let my phone buzz unanswered, notifications piling up. I’d lied to Zioh when he called, telling him I was with Andi and that I was fine.
I even refused when he offered to pick me up, claiming I’d already left, because there was no way I could let Tsabinu see that scene, not after everything.
By the time I woke this morning, his room was empty. He was gone. And the silence he left behind told me enough: he was furious this time. Maybe soon, he’d abandon me too…
My chest tightened at the thought, tears pricking my tired eyes again. I wished I’d been better. I pressed harder on the cold compress, focusing on the road ahead until I suddenly slammed the brakes.
My forehead hit the steering wheel with a sharp crack. “Ahh!” I cried out, clutching my head as pain flared. The compress slipped from my grasp, tumbling somewhere onto the floor.
I blinked hard, groaning. A car had shot out ahead of me, swerving to a stop inches from mine. We had avoided a crash by sheer luck.
Gasping for breath, my fingers twitching uncontrollably against the wheel, I squinted through the haze. “Aw… my head…” I groaned, shaking my head and trying to focus as a sharp pain stabbed across my forehead.
My eyes locked on the car before me, studying it carefully. I’d seen that car before. A blue Aston Martin, but… where?
I unbuckled my seatbelt with a low groan, adjusting myself upright. As my hand reached for the door handle, I froze. My entire body stiffened as the door swung open—revealing the very person who had nearly killed me.
“That woman…”
Of course.
I remembered now.
Cindy strode towards me, something in her hand—a brown file. She leaned down by my window, knocking on the glass. And then she smiled… so wide.
“Good morning, Tshabina,” she said with a voice that made my skin prickle. “It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it?”