Chapter 38
thirty-eight
HARLOW
The first thing that hits me is the smell. Antiseptic that always has an underlying smell of urine.
The next thing that hits me is the noise. The beeping of machines and barely audible crying.
The last thing that hits me is the bright light as I peel open my heavy eyelids.
It takes a few blinks to get my vision to clear. Fluorescent lights in the ceiling, monitors showing vitals, and scratchy blankets.
Yup. I’m in a hospital.
“Come on, Firecracker. You have to stay with me. I love you. Cora loves you. She needs her mom, and I need my wife.”
I turn my head to see Cal at my bedside, his hands clasped like he’s begging, tears flowing freely onto the blanket.
I open my mouth to tell him how much I love him, but nothing comes out. My mouth and throat are so dry it feels like I swallowed an entire desert. Instead, I reach for him; the movement taking more effort than that one time I thought running a half marathon was a good idea.
The moment my fingers brush his, Cal’s head whips up and his eyes lock onto mine. He’s a mess. His eyes are red and puffy, his face is covered in a messy almost-beard, and his hair is sticking up in every direction. The dark bags under his eyes advertise how little sleep he’s gotten.
“Harlow,” his voice cracks on a sob. He reaches out a shaky hand, gently stroking my face. “Is this a dream?”
I shake my head and slowly lift my hand, patting my throat, hoping he understands. His eyebrows fly up, and he grabs me a cup of water, holding the straw as I take a drink.
“Slowly,” he says, his eyes still locked on mine with so much adoration and fear shining in them it makes me want to cry.
“Cal.” My voice comes out as a croak, but it’s enough for him to collapse next to me and sob. His hand is gripping my hand so tightly it almost hurts, but I grip his hand back with as much strength as I have. “What happened?”
Cal kisses my hand, his tears mixing with his lips. “You jumped in front of me,” he says, pulling my hand to his chest and holding it there. “Never do that again.”
I snort. Cal shakes his head at me, but a small smile teases the corner of his lips.
“What’s the last thing you remember?” he asks, helping me take another sip of water.
“Corn,” I say, and it’s his turn to snort.
“You’re awake!” An older nurse says and clasps her hands together. “Oh, we so hoped you would. Your husband here, he never gave up hope, and he would kick out anyone who said otherwise. You got yourself a keeper right here, young lady,” she says with a wink. She has the kind of eyes that older people have where you can’t tell if they’re sparkling because they’re happy or if they’re chronically watery. I smile, though, fully aware of how lucky I am to have Cal in my life.
She takes my vitals and calls the doctor in. They fuss over me for longer than I’d like. Cal holds my hand the entire time, not giving a single shit that he’s in the way.
“Cora?” I ask when they finally leave us alone.
“She’s back at the hotel with everyone else,” Cal says, his thumbs rubbing the back of my hand. “She really misses you.”
“I’m sorry I scared you,” I tell him, my voice still raspy.
Cal leans forward and kisses me softly. “You can’t ever leave me, Harlow. I barely survived you laying in this fucking hospital bed and your heart was still beating. If it stopped . . . if you were gone,” he chokes.
“I’m here Cal. I’m not leaving you. I love you too much for that.”
“I love you too. So fucking much, Firecracker.”
We stay like this, his head in my lap, and my hand clasped against my chest until my eyes feel heavy, and I fall asleep.
The next time I wake up, my room is swarmed with people. Cal is still in his spot next to me, but my dad is on my other side. Belle, Kai, Mav, and Willa are standing by the window. Jo and Jason are at the foot of the bed with Cora.
“Mama!” Cora yells when she sees I’m awake.
“Hi Cora girl,” I say with a smile. “Mama missed you!” The anxiety I felt every time I referred to myself as her mom has vanished. That feeling of being an imposter or that I didn’t earn the title is gone.
Her pudgy little hands reach out for me, and I reach for her. Jason brings her over and gently puts her on the bed next to me. Cora immediately scrambles onto me, causing me to hiss when her foot hits my middle. I remember what happened. I just didn’t want to talk about it with Cal yet.
The doctor told me I had been in a coma for twelve days. My gunshot wound is healing well, but they had to make another incision in my front to get the bullet out from where it lodged itself underneath a rib. It’s still sore and a baby foot directly to it doesn’t feel great. Cal goes to grab her from me, but I hold her tight and glare at him. He shakes his head and laughs but keeps her bum and legs above my stomach as I hold her to me. She clings to me just as tightly.
“I missed you so much, my girl,” I tell her, kissing her cheek and smelling her hair.
“Mama,” she sighs in contentment.
My dad squeezes my shoulder and kisses my temple. “You scared the ever-loving shit out of me.”
I bark out a laugh. “I’ll try not to get kidnapped and shot next time.”
The mood in the room sobers, and I allow Cal to take Cora from me.
“What happened, Harry?” Jo asks, squeezing my foot.
I tell them everything that happened from the moment I stepped foot out of the nail salon until I woke up in this hospital bed. Everyone’s eyes just kept getting wider and wider. Which would be comical in any other situation.
“Like father, like daughter,” my dad sighs, sounding both impressed and exhausted.
“Okay, we can all admit the mud was really smart, though,” Mav says.
“I thought a bear was coming after me,” Cal says, causing everyone, including me, to laugh.
“A short and skinny bear on two legs?” Willa asks.
“Does Nebraska even have bears?” Kai asks Belle, who shrugs.
“Keep laughing. It was dark, she was covered in mud, and I wasn’t exactly thinking straight,” Cal defends.
“So, have we figured out who or why any of this happened?” I ask.
“Michael and Sal Anderson, brothers who were hired to take you and transfer you to an undisclosed location, were given five thousand dollars in cash and promised another five at the handoff,” my dad says, and I frown. “What?”
“Only ten grand?” I say, knowing it’s pretty stupid to be offended, but I think I’m worth a lot more.
My dad sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Michael, or Mikey, is no longer living,” he continues, pretending I didn’t speak. “And Sal is claiming he wasn’t the one who took the calls. They were supposed to meet whoever paid them at the farmhouse for the exchange, but plans changed. He didn’t know what caused the change, either.”
“It just feels so sloppy,” Jo says, crossing her arms, that familiar line forming between her brows as she thinks. “They didn’t seem too smart, and that seems risky.”
“I think they shared a single brain cell and left it at home that day,” I say seriously, but Kai bursts out laughing.
“Oh shit,” Willa says, staring at her phone. She grabs that control thing that all hospitals have attached to the beds and puts the TV on.
“Holy hell in a handbasket,” the nurse says as she comes into the room, probably because of the amount of people in here. No one looks at her, our eyes are glued to the screen.
Senator Wolfe is front and center giving a press conference. His dark hair is perfectly slicked back, and his expensive looking blue suit is as wrinkle-free as ever, but it’s his eyes. The panic is shining through.
“These allegations are unfounded. I can assure everyone here today and all the good people of Maine that I have been working tirelessly to rid this community of the drugs plaguing us. I have never and would never conspire to infect the state with more poison. I look forward to proving these allegations false and finding out who is trying to undermine my position as your senator. I will not be taking questions at this time. Thank you.”
“So they didn’t arrest him?” Mav asks, looking at his feet. I can’t imagine what he’s feeling right now.
“It’s a scare tactic. Someone, the DEA, if I had to guess, leaked that they were looking into him and had substantial evidence against him. They want him to panic and mess up so they can catch him,” my dad says.
“And what happens if they do? They arrest him, and we’re still no closer to finding Ezra,” Belle says. “I know getting drugs off the street is important, and I’m sorry if this sounds selfish, but Ezra is important too.”
“Can we, I don’t know, negotiate? Get time off his sentence if he tells us where Ez is?” Willa asks.
“There isn’t an open case,” I say sadly. “As far as the law is concerned, Ezra is dead and has been for almost seven years.”
“Going through the senator isn’t the right play. He won’t give us anything. The more he sees us poking, the more he’s going to react,” Jo says, gesturing to me. “Obviously.”
“So we’re going to just assume this was him and not anyone else?” Cal asks, not looking convinced.
“It was him, but I don’t have a strong enough way to connect it,” my dad said, looking down at his phone.
“You suddenly seem sure,” I say.
“My guy got into Mikey’s phone. He was texted the drop location from a burner phone. It was a private airstrip. He also found the plane you were supposed to be on.”
“Okay,” I say, waiting for the bomb to drop.
“The plane was supposed to fly to Maine, Harlow,” my dad says.
I sigh and look around the room. Everyone is exhausted. You can see it in their eyes, in the way they’re standing, in the way their shoulders are drooping in defeat.
“What’s going on with the tour?” I ask. We’re still in Nebraska, and we’re definitely not supposed to be right now.
“We postponed the shows for the second leg,” Cal says. “Logan was going to cancel them and take the hit once he found out what happened to you, but we told him no. I knew you’d be pretty upset if we did.”
“I’d be more than upset.”
Cal chuckles and shakes his head. I look at Jo while everyone else starts discussing when to resume the tour. I know she’s thinking the same thing I am.
We need to go to New Hampshire, but with the tour postponed, it’s going to be harder to convince Cal. I also refuse to let this ruin Cora’s birthday.
I just need to get out of the hospital and home first. Then I can regroup.