23. FRANKIE
TWENTY-THREE
FRANKIE
I swirl my glass of Valpolicella, gaze locked on the television where we have the boys’ game streaming.
Maddy, Shelby, and I are posted up in my living room watching the game.
The batter hits a bloop to center field, and Jackson jogs in to snag the easy high fly.
Seventh inning over. The Clippers are running away with this one, seventeen to three.
“Thank God for an easy win,” Maddy murmurs as he fills his wineglass for a second time.
“I know.” Shelby lets out a relieved groan. “I swear, Paulie was starting to enter the space. Before this road trip they’d only had one win in the last ten games.”
Maddy grimaces. “Same with East. Losing streaks are so fucking dark. And with how much shit has been going on with the team, so much of it was out of their control. You feel like a sitting duck. Helpless.”
Not many people truly understand how hard those low points in a season are for players.
I’ve watched my little brother play baseball for two decades.
I know the space Shelby is referring to: the dark place he goes to when he disappears inside himself.
Our ray of sunshine was doing his damnedest to keep the guys positive, but even Shaney-babe’s bright light was starting to wane.
Something finally seems to have clicked, though. This road trip has been amazing for the Clippers. They haven’t lost a game yet.
“Helps your man is on fire,” Maddy says, shooting me a grin. “Too bad the Clippers couldn’t have him take every at-bat.”
“Not my man.” I shoot him a look and take another sip of wine. The smooth, rich red slides over my taste buds, that deep plum note lingering with a hint of spice.
Shelby’s gaze catches mine over her wineglass, and I do not like the gleam in her brown eyes. “So, you’re both hooking up with other people then?”
“Nope,” Maddy answers for me. “They’re exclusive.”
“Sounds like he’s your man.”
I glare at the two conspirators. I don’t like being on this end of the conspiring. Usually, I’m the one being nosy and annoying.
“We are exclusively physical. It’s out of respect. Jackson, with all of a pinky toe out of the closet, isn’t about to start experimenting with other men. I get regular orgasms from him, so of course I’m going to agree with his request that we don’t hook up with other people. I’m not that greedy.”
“I didn’t realize regular orgasms was two over the course of…two weeks? Is that how long he’s been coming by now?” Maddy taps his lip.
“Sounds like infrequent orgasms if you ask me,” Shelby says with a smirk.
I narrow my eyes at the little sassy squirrel.
“You both are little shits. I was just cleared for orgasms. We have had four orgasm-able days. Two of which orgasms were had.” I arch a brow.
A fifty percent orgasm rate is good, isn’t it?
Then I frown. “How do you even know how many orgasms we’ve had, Maddy? What the fuck?”
Maddy snickers. “Educated guess. Jackson admitted all you two had done was jerk off in the shower together the day he came to my and East’s room. And I mean…we all knew what you were taking him back to your room to do after that conversation. So that’s two. Which you confirmed just now.”
Shelby holds up her hand, and Maddy high fives it. “Excellent orgasm detective work, Madz.”
“This is all very strange.”
“We are all very strange,” Shelby says succinctly.
“Truth.” Maddy grins.
Shelby leans forward and studies me. “So why aren’t you having orgasms every day?”
“What the fuck is this?” I demand. “Some sort of orgasm interrogation? Why aren’t you having orgasms every day?”
“Because I can’t.” Shelby’s jaw tightens. “Some of us are lucky if we get two orgasms a month.”
And I immediately feel like shit. I know she’s not really talking about orgasms. Shelby tries to make it up here every weekend to see Paulie, but with away games, that typically ends up being only two weekends a month. They get very little time together during the season.
Maddy pulls Shelby into the crook of his arm, and she deflates like a sad, wilted balloon.
“I’m sorry, Sea-Shelbs,” I say softly. “Your boy is up.” I nod toward the screen where Paulie is stepping into the batter’s box. Trent’s on second.
That’s all it takes for the light to come back into her eyes.
Paulie hits a line drive to the left-center gap, and Shelby’s on her feet screaming at him to run faster.
He ends up with a double, and Trent crosses the plate.
Shelby collapses back onto the loveseat with a squeal as Maddy and I let out a cheer.
Ribby for little Pao Pao.
“So, back to you and your orgasms.” Shelby blinks innocently at me.
I stick my tongue out at her, and she grins.
“We’ve established: you’re exclusive, he’s not your man, you have infrequent orgasms, but frequent cuddles,” Maddy says.
“Um, when did we establish that last part?”
“That was purely observational on my part,” he says. “So, what exactly are you? It sounds a hell of a lot like a relationship.”
“You’re not friends with benefits,” Shelby pipes in. “You weren’t friends to start with. It’s more than sex lessons, considering these lessons seem few and far between.”
She has me there. “I guess…we’re fake boyfriends?”
Maddy and Shelby cock their heads in unison.
“I’m giving him back the experiences he never had growing up. That includes sex, but also someone to cuddle up with while watching movies and that kind of thing. Just without the expectation of real feelings.” Without letting it turn into something I can’t give him.
“Frankie’s very own boyfriend experience,” Maddy murmurs, his gaze on the screen where East is up to bat. “An interesting service.”
“This is not the fake-boyfriend situation I’m used to,” Shelby adds.
“Yes, well, you read a lot of romance novels.”
She toasts me with her wineglass and takes another sip.
Easton strikes out, and we all groan.
Shelby turns back to me. “I know what Paulie says about Jackson and his particular dislike for him, but I don’t know… Whenever we’ve gone out with the team to Zingers, I’ve seen glimpses of this aching sadness in him. It makes a lot more sense now.”
“Me too,” Maddy adds. “I knew something was off, though I wasn’t sure what, the first time I met him. We clicked instantly, and he was so different with me than he was with any of his teammates. I thought he might be putting on a face for the team…”
“I think it’s really nice that you’re doing this for him, Frank,” Shelby says quietly.
I steel myself against the uncomfortable twist of my stomach. “Yes, such a sacrifice to have to share time and orgasms with a sexy professional ballplayer,” I joke.
“I mean, I think we can all agree on that point,” Maddy says. “Jackson is Delicious with a capital D.”
Shelby lets out a dreamy sigh. “I always thought Maddy had the sexiest brood-face, but Jackson totally takes the cake. No offense, Madz.”
“None taken. I completely agree. He’s got the sad boy brood which is, like, impossible to resist.”
“I don’t discriminate against the brood,” I say. “Bad boy brood. Sad boy brood. Mad boy brood. Give me all the broods.”
Maddy grins and shakes his head. “I agree with Shelbs, though. What you’re doing for him…it’s big.” His smile softens. “Just because you’re benefiting from this arrangement doesn’t make what you’re doing for Jackson any less impactful.
“When I visited him after everything went down, he told me a little about his family and hometown. And I could tell from the little he said he was holding back things much, much worse. And when I told him what it had been like for me: a supportive family who loved me even harder afterward… God, the look in his eyes. The bone-deep longing broke my fucking heart.”
Maddox stares intently at me, but I refuse to shift. He thinks he can look at me with his little voodoo physical therapist stare and see more than there is. There is nothing to see here.
“I’ve noticed a huge change in him since he started coming over. And I see more of what I’d recognized lurking underneath the surface. A guy who’s funny, kind, thoughtful. He’s going to make a man very lucky one day.”
“Maybe even a man we know,” Shelby singsongs.
I send her a dry look. “Don’t hold your breath, babe. No one’s made an honest man out of me yet. Jackson won’t be the one who does.”
I don’t like the look Maddy and Shelby share. They don’t understand, but I know better. I’m Jackie’s soft place to land while he’s here. A balm for his wounds. And one day he won’t need me any longer. Just like everyone else. I know better than to forget that fact.
I pull out my phone and tap out a text to Jackson.
Me
Think hard on what you want to learn next, Jackie-boy. As soon as you get home in two days, our sex lessons recommence.