Chapter 20
CHAPTER 20
T rinity debated buying a new dress for the occasion, but it just wasn’t in her budget. It wasn’t as though Spencer had seen her in any of the ones she already owned. Honestly, she hadn’t even seen herself in a dress since Calvin’s funeral, and that black knee-length belted wrap wasn’t something she ever planned to wear again.
Tonight was chilly, snow already falling outside the window, coming down in soft, white flakes. She dug around in her dresser and closet for over an hour until she finally assembled an outfit that she felt not only comfortable in, but also surprisingly pretty. A plum colored, cowl-neck sweater partnered with a floral maxi skirt of dark purple, cream, and burgundy hues, along with a pair of knee-high brown leather boots, felt like the perfect combination of both put-together and practical.
She’d opted to pull her hair into a low ponytail, borrowing one of Mia’s long ribbons to twist around the band.
She was pleased with her attire, but the part that hung her up was when it came to makeup. She rarely wore much, and even the lightest shade of powder on her eyelids felt like she was sporting stage makeup on a Broadway set. She could use some help in this area, but it felt too silly to call Rachel or even Sarah. She knew they would be happy to offer tips, but she hesitated. And the reason for that had everything to do with Spencer.
She feared it was too soon to feel this deeply for the man. What would everyone think? They’d all attended Calvin’s funeral, saw the tears that flowed from her eyes throughout the entire memorial. She knew her emotions were sincere, that her grief was deep and fresh and real. But to admit that she had feelings for someone new hardly a year later felt like the biggest betrayal to her late husband’s memory. Of course, she doubted anyone would echo this fear of hers, but she couldn’t help but wonder if there were murmurings and whispers going on behind the scenes. Small towns were made for gossip, and idle chatter was a constant white noise.
She would figure out the whole makeup thing on her own.
A half-hour later and three YouTube videos in, she heard a faint knock at the door.
Right on time. She appreciated Spencer’s promptness. He’d agreed to pick her up at seven for their seven-thirty reservation at Timber Creek Bistro a short drive up the mountain. She had dropped the kids off at the barn at five. Nana Jo had requested they come early to get started on the dough for the homemade pizzas. And while Trinity had offered to meet Spencer at the restaurant to eliminate all of the back and forth, he insisted on picking her up. In every sense of the word, this was a real date, complete with the very real butterflies that burst in her stomach when she opened the door and glimpsed Spencer on the other side.
He was still every bit the cowboy she admired, but this time dressed in dark denim, polished boots, and a crisp plaid shirt complete with a tan jacket that wasn’t his typical work one. And she was honestly surprised to see him without his signature cowboy hat, his hair actually styled with a brush and comb. He looked fresh and clean, and smelled even better, this minty pine aroma that had her wanting to bury her face in his chest and take a big breath.
Instead, she stayed on her side of the doorway and gave him a big grin. “Goodness, you clean up well.”
“I’m not always covered in dust and hay.” His mouth grew into a smile that dimpled both cheeks. “You look beautiful, Trinity.”
“Thank you.” She smoothed her hands down her skirt before reaching back into the house to grab her navy peacoat and purse hanging on the hooks by the door.
“You ready?” he asked with an elbow extended to lead her to down the icy front step. “I left the truck running with the heater on. It’s colder tonight than predicted.”
Autumn was like this in Snowdrift. Some days were warm, reminiscent of summer’s lingering heat, while others hinted at the harsh winter they would surely endure.
“That’s very kind of you,” she said as she threaded her arm through his. “I appreciate it.”
“There aren’t any seat warmers, but I brought a blanket in case you got cold. The truck’s dependable, but old.” He laughed to himself, snickering. “Kind of like Nana Jo.”
“She was so sweet to take the kids tonight. I owe her one.”
Spencer stepped back into the road as he tugged on the passenger side door handle and opened up the truck for Trinity to climb in.
“She enjoys being around kids. Says it helps keep her young. But truth be told, I think Nana Jo is just happy to have another horse girl around. My sister never got that gene, and other than me, Nana doesn’t have too many people who share her passion.”
Trinity buckled herself in while Spencer shut the door and jogged around the front of the truck to take his place in the driver’s seat.
“How is her horse doing?” she asked as he got settled.
Pulling out onto the road, Spencer cast a glance across the cab. “Alpine? He’s okay. I actually rode him the other day, but I think he’s got something going on. Maybe an old injury flaring up. Possibly arthritis. I need to have the vet out to take a look, but I’m thinking it might be time for Nana Jo to consider putting him into retirement. It’ll kill her to do so, but I think it’s for everyone’s good.”
“And what would that look like?” Trinity knew the woman’s love for that horse and hoped it didn’t mean sending him out to pasture in the way some people interpreted it.
“Basically, he’d just be an expensive pet. He’d still get his shoes, things like that. Still get his stall in the winter and a paddock in the warmer months. All his vaccines, plus maybe a couple extra supplements to address any pain issues. Mostly it would just mean his riding days are over.”
“And do you think the reason Nana Jo has been so hesitant to retire him is because she’s worried it might mean her riding days are over, too?”
Spencer looked at her again, his expression softening. “You know, I haven’t thought of it that way, but I think that could be a very real possibility. She’s stubborn. So is that horse. But maybe it’s for both of their best interests to hang up the saddle.”
“What about Bluebell? Do you think she’d be able to ride her?”
“Absolutely. That horse is a doll, and she’s young enough that she still has lots of solid riding years ahead of her. It’s why I think she’s such a good match for Mia. If Nana just wanted a dependable horse to ride around the property, I think Bluebell would fit the bill. But the bond between a horse and its rider is strong, and I’m not sure she’s going to have that with any horse other than Alpine. They’ve been through a lot together. She sure loves him.”
Trinity shrugged. “I don’t know. I think she’ll learn that she can easily fall in love all over again.”
She hadn’t meant for it to sound so vulnerable, like a confession of her own heart’s desires. And thankfully, Spencer didn’t dwell on it or address that elephant in the room. He just carried on driving to the restaurant, every now and then angling the heater vents in her direction when they would slip. The truck was old, but Trinity didn’t mind. She had all the warmth she needed in that cab, and she knew most of it came from being with the man sitting beside her.
Once at the restaurant, the hostess ushered them to the back of the establishment, a secluded high-back booth with soft leather seats and a small tealight flickering in the center of the table. Trinity scanned the menu. Everything sounded so good. She would have been content eating one of the child-made pizzas back at the ranch, but one glance at the fancy restaurant’s offerings had her grateful for Spencer’s insistence that they go out for a change. It was a real treat.
“What looks good to you?” he asked, his menu slipping so he could view her over the top.
“Everything.” Her mouth watered with the words.
“Yeah. Not a bad thing on here. Though I don’t know if I’m up for the game-of-the-week.”
“It’s probably venison or elk. Maybe wild boar,” she said with a shrug. Her dad had been a big hunter in his younger years and growing up, their fridge was often stocked with meats you couldn’t get from the butcher at the local grocery store.
“I think I’m leaning toward the ribeye,” Spencer said in true cattle rancher fashion.
“That does look good.”
“You know they actually source their steaks from my old ranch?” He closed the leatherbound menu and placed it in front of him. “I was wondering what would happen to that contract after I left. I’m glad to see it’s still in effect.”
“Do you ever miss it?” She’d made her mental selection too—the petite filet mignon—and closed her menu.
“Cattle ranching?”
She gave a small nod.
“I don’t know. Sometimes I miss the work. The guys I used to push cattle with. And as strange as it might sound, I miss calving season. I always have a soft spot for the new mama cows. But if you’re asking if I regret giving that life up for this one, not a chance.”
Something sparked in his gaze, making her wonder if she had anything to do with that.
“I’m happy to be a part of what Nana Jo has going on with the B&B and the trail rides associated with Major Hart Mountain Sports. I think the whole endeavor has a lot of protentional. I’m just not sure how much longer she’ll have the energy for it.”
Just then, their server came by to collect their menus and orders, then said he would be back with two ice waters and a basket of bread. Trinity picked the conversation back up once he was on his way.
“Are you hoping to take it all over one day?”
“I think that’s ultimately the plan. But I don’t know.” His gaze trailed out the huge picture windows that framed in the summit like a mountain-living postcard. “I’d rather run it with someone.”
“It’s a big endeavor,” she agreed.
“It is, but it’s less about sharing the workload for me. It’s more about sharing the memories.”
Twenty minutes later, they were halfway into their meals and deep in a conversation that rolled from one topic to the next. It was effortless, natural. Spencer would refill Trinity’s water glass from the carafe left on the table while she talked, and she would top off his wine when he was mid-conversation. During one point in their meal, he even stretched over the table to swipe his finger across her lip to remove a stray crumb of bread that had collected there. The back and forth was symbiotic in the most comforting way.
“You have room for dessert?” He ran the cloth napkin over his own mouth as he stretched back in his seat, appearing full.
“I can always make room for dessert,” she teased, and together they settled on the raspberry cheesecake, along with two glasses of Moscato, Trinity’s favorite dessert wine.
“Oh, wow.” Spencer made a face when he took the first sip after their server had returned with their bubbly wine. “This is sweet.”
“I warned you.” She smiled while he attempted another swig, his face contorting like he’d just sucked on a lemon.
“Spencer?” a woman’s voice suddenly hollered from a few tables over. “Trinity? Is that you?”
Trinity switched her focus from the wine to the woman that was now quickly approaching them with a big grin on her face. It was Molly Jacobs, the journalist from Snowdrift Summit Living.
“Oh, hi, Molly. Nice to see you again.” Their evening had been going so well that Trinity had almost forgotten they were at a restaurant with other patrons, she’d been so wholly focused on Spencer and their conversation. “How’s the article coming along?”
“It’s ready for print, actually. You should be able to find it around town by the end of the week. You’re going to love it!”
Oh, that was so much sooner than Trinity had expected. She wasn’t sure why she had been under the impression that they would be gifted a sneak peek before publication. She supposed that wasn’t really the norm, but things sometimes operated differently with small-town presses.
“I’m telling you, you two have such chemistry on camera,” Molly emphasized, her hands clasping together excitedly. “But I’m sure you get that all the time.”
No, they hadn’t, considering it was the first time they’d even been on camera together. Trinity felt lost for words, and thankfully, Spencer picked up on that.
“Can’t wait to see it,” he interjected, then added, “Enjoy your meal.” It was an effective period at the end of the increasingly awkward conversation because Molly just gave them one more massive smile before scurrying back to her table to join the man she’d been dining with.
Spencer’s gaze came back around to Trinity.
“You good?” His chin dipped to search out her expression, but she wasn’t currently looking up.
She poked at the uneaten cheesecake with the tines of her fork. “Yeah.” Her head shook, then her eyes finally lifted to find his, open and honest and looking at her with genuine concern. “I’m sorry. I guess I just wasn’t expecting the article to be done so quickly. I thought we had more time to get used to the idea of being in the spotlight.”
“I don’t think it’s a very big magazine. It’s bi-monthly, if I remember correctly, and our article was a last-minute filler for something else. I think they rushed it to print.”
She was excited to see it, but there was an equal amount of dread bubbling in her stomach when she envisioned exactly what Molly meant by chemistry. She knew they looked good together, but what else had the camera picked up on?
“I’m sure it’ll be great,” Spencer reassured, and when his hand came down over Trinity’s resting on the table between them and he gave a gentle squeeze, the gesture was comforting enough to let her worries go. Almost all of her worries.
“Do you think people are going to get the wrong idea?” she asked, her voice carrying a hint of doubt she couldn’t mask.
“What would the wrong idea be?”
That was a good question, she supposed. Because they were dating, after all. They were out on one now, for heaven’s sake.
“I don’t know.” Her shoulders jumped to her ears. “I’m just worried people might talk.”
Something tightened in Spencer’s expression. His hand pulled back and folded with the other in his lap. “They might talk.” He gave a shrug that matched her own. “It’s no secret you could do a lot better than me. People might point that out, I suppose.”
“Oh, Spencer.” Her hand shot back out toward him, nearly knocking over his still-full glass of wine between them. “That’s not what I meant at all. I’m just worried people might say things.” Her gaze dropped. “About me.”
“What could anyone say about you that isn’t completely good?”
“That I’ve moved on too quickly.” The words rolled right out. “That there’s no way I could be over the loss of Calvin already. That it’s too soon.” They just kept coming. “That my heart is still too broken to hand over to someone else.”
“Do you feel those things?” She could see Spencer’s jaw flex, the muscle at the back pulsing as his throat strained to swallow.
“Most days I don’t. But some days I do.”
“Trinity.” Spencer’s lips pressed together, and he sighed. “I would never want to pressure you into pursuing something you’re not ready for. I’m sorry if that’s what I’ve been unintentionally doing.”
That wasn’t it, though. She had wanted this every bit as much as Spencer. Maybe more, even. She just wasn’t sure of the timing. If there would be some magical day when it finally felt appropriate to move on. If that existed, she was still waiting for it to come.
“I just don’t want to sully your good name, Spencer.”
He huffed out a loud laugh that caught her off-guard. “Not a chance of that happening, considering it wasn’t all that good to start off with. If anything, you only improve it.”
She had to chuckle. He really didn’t give himself enough credit sometimes.
When she didn’t say anything for a stretch of time, Spencer downed the remainder of his wine and called the waiter over for the check.
“I want to take things at whatever pace you’re comfortable with, Trinity. And honestly, if it means going back to when we were just friends, I’m fine with that.” He paused a moment, and the tender look that moved across his face was enough to make tears collect in her eyes. “I just want you in my life, any way I can have you.”