Chapter 1
“T
his looks lovely,” Lyndsay said, picking up a ripe apple. It was shining and red, almost like a huge ruby.
“Aye, Ma,” Emma said absently. She adjusted the shawl she wore over her head, trying to hide the strands of blonde hair that always poked out.
Whenever people walked by, she had the strong sense that they were looking at her, always judging her for not being a true Scot.
They were all pleasant enough to never say anything to her face, of course, but that didn’t stop them from thinking it behind their eyes.
“What else shall we get? I was thinking of buying something for your father, a small gift because he does work so hard for us,” Lyndsay said.
Emma cringed a little, wishing that her mother didn’t have to speak up so loudly.
Despite having lived in the village for around two decades, Lyndsay had not lost her English accent at all, and it set her apart from the others in the village.
Unfortunately, in Emma’s mind, it only drew attention to them, and that was the last thing she wanted.
“I’m sure he’ll appreciate it,” Emma said, but was still fiddling with her shawl.
Lyndsay fought to get her hands away from it. “Will you stop messing around with that thing? I don’t know why you’re wearing it anyway. It hides your beauty,” Lyndsay said.
Emma clamped her mouth shut, for she didn’t want to have another argument about something that had plagued her since childhood.
Guilt surged through her heart, for the shade of her hair was something that she shared with her mother.
It also curled when it became damp as well, but where Lyndsay let it flow freely down her shoulders, Emma tried to hide it away.
There had been countless times when she had wished to have the same dark shade of hair as her father, which was also the shade shared by the women of the village.
Sometimes the last thing any child wanted was to stand out, but Emma had stood out all her life thanks to her parentage.
When she was younger, the other children had teased her mercilessly about all of her differences.
They mocked her mother’s English accent as well as using straw to mimic Emma’s hair, and the impressions they performed were never flattering.
Emma pulled her head away, trying to twist away from her mother’s interfering hands.
“I just like it, that’s all. It keeps me warm,” Emma said in her rolling brogue.
Lyndsay rolled her eyes and shook her head, no doubt thinking that Emma was just being difficult again.
“So what do you think we should get your father?”
“Da likes a good cheese,” Emma suggested.
“But we can get cheese anytime. I want to get him something special, something to show him that we appreciate all the work he does.”
“Well, ye hae known him longer than I,” Emma said.
Lyndsay stopped and turned toward her. “I don’t know why you’re being so petulant today, but I don’t appreciate it. You are becoming a young woman, and you must leave these childish attitudes behind. It’s hardly going to make you more appealing to a man.”
Emma was only just able to stop herself from rolling her eyes.
For a couple of years now, ever since she had shed the bloom of youth and entered her womanhood, her parents had been speaking about marriage as though it was inevitable.
Emma wondered if she was ever going to get a say in the matter.
She was only nineteen, and as far as she was concerned, she had plenty of time left to find a husband, but her parents seemed insistent on the matter.
Before Emma could reply, they were interrupted by an unwelcome presence: David.
David was the son of Hamish, one of the men who had first invited Emma’s parents to make their home in the village.
David always had a smile on his face and darted about the village helping out people with various tasks.
He was talented in many areas, but Emma could only remember the way he had mocked her when they were younger.
If that memory existed for him then he didn’t show it, for he smiled and acted as though they were friends.
“It’s a pleasure tae see ye on such a wonderful day,” he said.
“And a pleasure to see you as well,” Lyndsay said, smiling that smile she thought was so secret, but Emma knew her thoughts plainly.
“Emma, ye are looking as pretty as the dawn taeday. Hae ye given any more thought tae my proposal? Beltane Day is fast approaching, and I was hoping that ye would accept before then sae that we can celebrate as a married couple. Imagine the celebrations!” David said, his eyes gleaming with excitement.
Lyndsay gave Emma an encouraging look, but Emma’s heart was hard. She offered a polite smile. “I appreciate yer interest, David, but my answer is the same as it haes been all the other times ye hae asked me…nay.”
David was undeterred by her rejection.
“Aye, but if I ask ye enough times then perhaps ye will change yer mind,” he said. “Ye cannae blame a man for being hopeful anyway.”
“I suppose there’s no harm in believing for the impossible tae change, but just like the tides flow and the sun rises, my answer will always be the same. There are plenty other girls for ye tae bother. I’m sure one of them will make Beltane Day one tae remember for ye,” Emma said.
“But how could I want any of those girls when I could hae ye?” David asked.
“But I shall nae waste any more of yer time. I hope next time we see each other, I will hae a different answer,” David said, and moved away.
When he turned his back, Emma felt the tension dissipate from her body, and she was able to breathe a little more easily.
“What are you doing, Emma? Your father and I never raised you to speak to people like that!” Lyndsay rebuked, shocked at her daughter’s behavior.
She took hold of Emma’s slender arm and pulled her away from the market stalls.
There were a few eyebrows that had been raised by Emma’s spiteful words, and apparently, Lyndsay had had enough.
“There’s nothing wrong with David, and you shouldn’t be so quick to decline his marriage proposal. He comes from a good family and has proven himself to be a valued member of the village. There are far worse prospects than him in the world, of that I am sure,” Lyndsay continued.
Emma sighed a little. “Ye and I hae vera different memories of him, Ma. I remember him when we were younger. He was always there, mocking me, teasing me. I dinnae want tae spend my life with a man who haes sae little respect for me. He haes nae even apologized!”
For a moment Emma thought her mother might actually understand her plight, but Lyndsay shook away whatever doubts she had.
“You can’t expect to hold him to judgment for something he did when he was a child.
I’m sure he’s matured since then and changed, just as you have.
Need I remind you of the kind of child you were?
You used to throw tantrums so loud, the entire village thought a storm was coming. ”
Emma cringed with embarrassment. “That still doesnae change the fact that David disrespected me, and I should nae be expected tae settle for the first man who asks for my hand.” Emma folded her arms across her chest, and in a challenging tone, said, “Or would ye like tae change the agreement we made?”
Lyndsay wilted immediately and sighed. “No, you know I don’t want to do that.
I’m not so old that I have forgotten what it was like for my father to choose a marriage for me.
I managed to escape that fate, and I would never dare to make such a choice for you.
I truly hope that you find the man you belong with because I know what a happy and joyous thing marriage can be.
Everyone deserves to have a loving family, Emma.
I only want the best for you. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, and I’m sorry if sometimes it comes across in the wrong way. ”
“I know, Ma, and I’m sorry tae. I know this village was yer salvation and yer chance at a new life, but it haes nae always been a place of happiness for me. The girls here hae never taken me as one of their own, and I dinnae hae many friends. I cannae just change the way I think and feel.”
“Nobody is asking you to do that, especially not me. I just want you to understand that you deserve to be happy, and the sooner that can begin, the better. After all, you don’t want to spend your entire life living with us, do you?
There’s a lot for you to experience, Emma, and I don’t want you to miss out on life.
Your father doesn’t either. Just think about it, please, that’s all I ask. ”
“Aye, Ma, I’ll think about it, but I cannae promise anything,” Emma said.
Lyndsay seemed satisfied with the response, but Emma had no intention of marrying in the near future. Life on the farm with her parents was settled and comfortable, and she saw no reason to upset the balance of it.
As she and Lyndsay walked through the market in the village, she caught sight of people she had grown up with and was once again reminded of the cruelty she had suffered.
Her mother had been through a grand adventure, of course, so terrifying that she and her father had almost lost their lives.
Yet they didn’t know what it was like to be unwelcome in a place, to always be shunned by people who could have been friends.
In truth, Emma wasn’t even sure that she wanted to live in this village any longer.
She thought that perhaps there could be somewhere out there where she would belong, somewhere she wouldn’t be bullied or teased or harassed.
Until she found that place, though, she was resigned to remaining on the farm with her parents.
At least when she was among the crops and the livestock, she didn’t have to worry about finding her place in the world.
Life could be sweet and gentle, and her mind could be free of all cares, at least until she thought about people again.
She knew that David would plague her with his proposal again and again.
He had grown into a handsome man, but she wondered why he was so insistent on marrying her rather than the other women in the village.
In the back of her mind, she feared it was another gambit designed to humiliate her.
Ah yes, she could even imagine it, all the village gathered for a wedding and her dressed up in her finest clothes, all leading to a punchline where David would leave her standing there alone.
That prospect certainly made more sense than him falling in love with her, for he had made it perfectly clear many times over that he didn’t care about her feelings.
She put these thoughts to the back of her mind as she went around the market with her mother and gathered more supplies.
These moments were nice, when she could remember what it was like to be young and not be troubled by thoughts of marriage or the future.
How she wished it was possible to never grow up.
They managed to find some fine leather gloves for Douglas and then left the village for their farm.
Emma’s gaze drifted at the beautiful horizon around them.
Summer was approaching, and the leaves on the trees were lush, while the flowers dotted the landscape with color.
It was a time for new beginnings, and she dearly hoped that she could manifest happiness for herself or that her parents would come to terms with the fact that she may not get married at all.
After all, they had given her the gift of choice, and it was up to her how she used it.