Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Adam
“Come on, Babe. Let’s get you to bed.” Justin gently tugs Roxy’s hand, but she’s not budging.
“You go on. I want to talk to Adam about that thing we talked about earlier, okay?”
Adam interjects, “We’re all kind of worn out from today. Can’t it wait until tomorrow, Rox?”
“No. I’ll be too busy with the wedding, silly.”
Keri palms my shoulder. “Hear her out, Adam. I’ll wait up for you.”
I glance at Keri and Justin. They nod.
“Okay.” I wait until they’ve retreated to their bedrooms. “What’s up, Roxy? You’ve already asked me to walk you down the aisle, and we got that covered at the rehearsal. What can’t wait until tomorrow?”
She offers me a tired smile. “Do you remember the day you married Mia?”
I feel like I’ve been sucker punched and choke out a breath.
The vivid memory is instant: Mia coming toward me down the rose-petaled aisle, wearing a white dress.
The world stopped for a breathtaking moment as all the other guests faded away.
I was stunned, a feeling of pure, overwhelming joy pulsing through my body…
“Yes? What are you getting at, Rox?”
“I was a bridesmaid at your wedding, remember?”
“I remember.” I swallow hard to keep my emotions at bay.
“I’ll never forget how you cried when she walked down the aisle and how emotional you were saying your vows. I thought it was kind of corny at first.”
I blink, thrown off, my face twisting with confusion. “Corny?”
“Yes. I’d never seen that side of you before. And I haven’t seen it since, until this weekend.”
I frown. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”
“You and Keri. It’s obvious how you feel about her. You’ve fallen in love with her.”
“Yes, I have,” I say without hesitation.
“Don’t get me wrong, I’m incredibly happy for you. And for Keri. In fact, I had a realization that hit me over the head today.”
“What kind of realization?”
“I’m about to make a lifelong commitment to the man that I love. He may not be the perfect man, and that’s okay. Nobody’s perfect. I’m certainly a long way from perfect.”
“And you’re just now thinking about this, the night before your wedding?”
She giggles. “Better late than never, right?”
The weight of guilt hits me, and I cross to her, dropping onto the couch. Pulling her in for a hug, my voice comes out thick with regret. “Roxy, I’m so sorry I haven’t been around these last couple of years. I feel like I’ve let you down. But I promise, things are going to change.”
“I know. Keri said the same thing.”
I smile, thinking of Keri with her calm demeanor, chatting about life with my cousin. “So, what’s this sudden realization?”
“I need to focus more on Justin. Not the house or the parties or his work and family. Just… Justin. I feel like we’ve both been lonely in this relationship. You don’t have to be alone to be lonely.”
“I know.”
“He is a wonderful man. He’s good to me, and I don’t deserve him. He touched my heart like no one else when we first met. And then somehow, we got too busy living and haven’t spent enough time loving. And I love him. I do.”
“I know, Roxy. Believe me, I know.”
She looks up at me with wet, hopeful eyes. “You do?”
A warm pride rises in me, softening the confusion.
“Mmmhmm. The more I get to know the guy, the more I like him. You balance each other out. And I understand where you’re coming from.
Sometimes life can get in the way. You get the bad news and the glorious sunset on the same day.
You cry over the headlines, then you laugh when a toddler grabs your piece of cake off your plate when you’re not looking. ”
She giggles. “Did that happen to you recently?”
I chuckle. “Yes, it did. There’s living and loving.
It’s the dual citizenship of being alive, Roxy.
Anger and awe, deep sorrow and grace. We’re allowed to feel both.
We are allowed to scream and still comment on how good the salsa is.
We are allowed to feel lonely in a room full of people.
We don’t have to choose. I’ve learned to let it all in. To take it as it comes.”
She mulls over my words, her next statement coming out of the blue. “I sure hope you’ll take Keri to Feather Falls while you’re here.”
I’m confused. “What made you think of that?”
I hadn’t thought about Feather Falls in years. The drive alone is long and off the beaten path to the trailhead, but it’s totally worth it. Feather Falls is the 6th-highest waterfall in the world, with breathtaking views. For a photographer like me, it’s a dream.
“Well, we’re talking about living and loving. I know it was your favorite place to hike. If you’re not going to ever go back to your property, you should totally take Keri to the falls before you fly out and show her your love for California. Unless you don’t love it anymore.”
I sigh. “Of course, I love it here. I’ll always love it here. But my life is in Georgia now.” I clear my throat and try to get her back on track. “So, what was this ‘thing’ you wanted to talk to me about?”
She sits up and grabs both of my hands. “It’s two more things, actually.”
“Oh, boy.”
“Do you want the easy one first, or the one that might make you mad?”
I suck in a deep breath through my nostrils. “You pick.”
“Okay. Just so you know, we’ve already hired a reputable photographer and videographer for our wedding, so you can sit back and just be a special guest. But I was wondering…
would you mind taking a few pictures of me in my wedding dress tomorrow before the ceremony?
You’re by far the best photographer I know.
And you’re my only family. I want you to have the honor of capturing the official bridal portrait.
And… it could be your wedding present to Justin and me.
” She tents her hands in a prayer gesture, her mega-watt smile on full throttle.
My heart instantly turns to mush, and I tilt my head to look at her, my lips trembling with a smile. “I was already planning on it. I’ve got my camera ready to go. I’ll shoot whatever you want me to.”
She squeals and bounces on the couch cushion like a little girl. Throwing her arms around my neck, she practically strangles me with a hug. “Oh, thank you, Adam. Thank you, thank you, thank you!”
“Ugh, you’re choking me.” I laugh, peeling her arms back from my shoulders. “Time to spill the rest of it, cuz. Don’t hold back now. You’re on a roll. What’s the second thing?”
Her breath hitches. Anxiety flickers in her eyes, but she lets it out in a rush. “Okay. Here it comes… I invited Dan Combs to the wedding.”
It takes a minute for her words to register. “Dan Combs? My agent?”
“Yes. He RSVP’d, and it’s too late to uninvite him now.”
“Why in the world would you invite Dan? You’ve met him like, what? Twice? And one of those times was right after the fire. I don’t understand.”
“I’m selfish, Adam. You know this. I thought if you and he were in the same room again, he could convince you to come back to California and resume your career. And then I’d have my cousin back in my life again.”
I’m scowling, watching her mouth move fast as her words take hold. Sweet Roxy. My cousin, who has always been more like a sister to me. I love her, and seeing her now, I feel the weight of having let her down through my absence. I can’t be mad at her for this. In fact, I’m touched by her concern.
I reach for her, but she jerks back, flinching as if she expects anger. The distance stings.
“Come here.” I pull her into my arms and breathe in her coconut shampoo, the faint scent grounding me.
Her voice is tiny and fragile against my ear. “You’re not mad?”
“No. I’m not mad. You’re the one who should be mad. I’m so sorry, Roxy.”
She relaxes in my arms. “No more apologies.”
“Okay.”
We sit there hugging, the sound of the ocean at low tide filtering in through the window seams.
A strange mix of joy and loss fills my chest. I get to celebrate Roxy and Justin’s love tomorrow yet I can’t help mourning the part of me left behind. A wedding and a funeral. Hope tangled with final endings.
This should be interesting.