Chapter 19 #3
“Why not?” Ellen released hold of his penis and set her hands on his upper thighs to better balance herself as she frowned up at her husband. “You do it to me, and I like it. Surely I can return the favor.” Her thumbs stroked his hard muscles through the wool.
Mark shook his head, a sandy lock falling across his forehead. “This is what whores do. You are a lady.”
I know, Ellen almost replied. Where do you think I got the idea? Mark, despite his passion and eagerness, would not appreciate her flippancy. Instead she looked at his face. “Is it dirty, when you kiss me there?”
He shook his head savagely. “I love it.” His voice was hoarse.
“Would it please you? If I kissed and licked and sucked on you, like you do to me?” She watched him closely.
A muscle ticked in his jaw, and his eyes slid off her to rest somewhere over her shoulder, perhaps at the fire.
“Is that a no?” Ellen pressed, caressing his thighs.
Mark groaned. “I want to say no.” His cock pulsed hard.
“But is that the truth?”
“You shouldn’t. I don’t wish to degrade you.” He sounded like ground glass.
Ellen quirked a smile. “Pleasing you is never degrading to me. It is a joy and honor. Let me please you. As someone who lov—cares for you, let me give you the pleasure you do for me.” She waited, searching his face. “May I?”
Mark dragged his gaze back to hers, and she shivered at the heat and emotion glowing from them. “Very well.”
Ellen hid her smile and bent back over his lap.
She carefully stroked him again, letting her fingers go feather-soft sometimes and gripping others.
She listened closely to his moans and noted the way his thighs tensed as she cupped his bollocks and rolled them.
Squeezing them gently, she added her mouth to his cock.
After a few kisses, her stomach rebelled.
But this was her first time, and she’d fought for the opportunity, so Ellen wasn’t stopping now.
She opened wide and engulfed his head, taking his cock in her mouth.
He was hot and heavy, lying on her tongue.
She groaned, wanting him to feel the desire that coursed through her at the ability to give him pleasure.
“Christ, Ellen,” he swore. “You feel so good.” His hips bucked, and Ellen nearly gagged.
But she swished her tongue around him, wetting him down, stroking his base with her fingers.
And then she did gag. Ellen tried to fight it off, to swallow and continue her plan to seduce him, but the gag turned into full choking.
Embarrassed, eyes watering and cheeks aflame, she jerked off him and put a hand to her mouth.
“Fuck, Ellen, are you well? Did I hurt you?” Mark leaned forward to hold her shoulders.
Ellen waved him off, but her stomach lurched inside her. She bolted for the empty glasses on his desk. Ellen barely managed to pick one crystal cup up before she vomited.
It wasn’t much, for she hadn’t been able to eat recently. But there were disgusting noises and heaving.
When she finished, she felt Mark behind her, stroking her hair and putting a hand to the small of her back. He gently took the cup from her hands and set it down on the desk. “Maybe we shouldn’t try that again.” He cupped her chin and gently wiped her lips dry with his bare thumb.
“No!” Ellen closed her eyes, unable to bear the sight of him in her embarrassment. “I can do it! I want to do it. I just...My gag reflex is incredibly sensitive right now. I wouldn’t normally be this way.”
Mark pulled her into his arms, and she buried her face in his shoulder. “It’s fine. I’m not upset. We can try again later.”
“I can try again,” Ellen offered, voice muffled in the lapel of his coat.
“Why don’t we try again after the baby’s born,” he suggested.
She stiffened. Ellen didn’t know how he could throw it out there, so casually, like it was normal to talk about babies and children and expectations that these little creatures would be alive and healthy.
Ellen’s mind drifted in that direction, and she abruptly shut it down.
No thinking about babies. Nothing. She kept it firmly on the present.
“Ellen, we can’t avoid the topic forever.” His voice drifted across her cheek like a summer zephyr. “I understand wanting to avoid pain, I do. I’m terrified, too. But refusing to feel joy now won’t make the sorrow hurt less if it comes.”
Ellen felt gutted. She tried to respond, but her mind shut down.
Mark eased her back to kiss her. “We’ll take it day by day. I’d feel much better if we acknowledged both our fears and our hopes.”
Ellen knew what he said was logical. Healthy, even. But she wasn’t there yet. She was still frozen in fear, burying her head in the sand like an ostrich, and unable to move forward. Not yet. So she nodded and stepped out of his arms.
“Where are you going?” Mark pulled her back. “Is it over?”
“I’m not a very alluring bedmate.” Ellen swallowed the acidic taste in her mouth.
“You’re always alluring to me.” Mark set his hands on her hips and drew her so close he set his leg between hers. “Perhaps you cannot pleasure me now, but surely I can pleasure you?”
Ellen flushed. “I’m not sure why you’d want to, after my display.”