Chapter 24
Penny
All I’ve been able to think about since I woke up this morning is how Declan fucked me bare and wasn’t going to stop. I’m walking through the booths at the trade show and have plans to meet with him in thirty minutes, but I’m still reeling from yesterday.
Declan doesn’t want kids. Declan doesn’t want to play daddy to anyone else’s kids. Declan said that he and I would never happen. Declan knew I wasn’t on birth control.
So, why the fuck did he do what he did?
I’ve had to push all my feelings aside for him because of these facts. It’s been hard, but I’ve done it.
What scares me is that I didn’t outright tell him to stop when he flipped me over and made me watch him enter me bare, and I’m not sure I was going to. It was totally reckless on my part. But whatever he saw on my face had him pulling away, and I can only tell myself it was for the best.
I decide I’ve retained enough information from the trade show that my brain can handle and head to go up to my hotel room and change before Declan takes me to the tattoo convention.
Last night, after we left my room, everything seemingly went back to normal while we went sightseeing.
We walked through casinos and had a few drinks, even a few laughs.
Declan eventually walked me back to my hotel and then left me by myself for the rest of the night.
A part of my brain wondered if he was meeting up with the girl he was talking about on the car ride to the airport, going to go and finish what we had started.
The thought left my stomach in knots the rest of the night, and I didn’t get a wink of sleep, afraid that that’s exactly what he did.
“Hey, I’m sorry to bother you, but my name’s Tony. I saw you at the trade show.” A tall man stops me as I walk through the casino floor towards the elevators.
It takes me a second to gain my bearings since I was so lost in thought, and now that I have a chance to look at him, he’s good-looking.
Really good looking. His dark hair is cropped short on the sides, and the top is expertly styled back.
He’s dressed in jeans, a black Henley, and white slide-on sneakers, and his honey-brown eyes capture mine while he smiles at me.
I push my hair behind my ear. “Uh… hi. I’m Penny.”
He gently pulls me to the side by my forearm as a group of people passes by. “I know this seems super forward, but I was wondering if maybe you wanted to have lunch with me?”
“Oh…um–”
“Penny, there you are,” Declan says, not a moment later. “I was looking for you.” He comes to my side and intertwines his fingers with mine. I look down at where we’re joined and blank out for a moment.
“Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize… have a good one,” Tony says and disappears into a crowd of people.
I look up at Declan, but before I can say a word, he’s pulling us to the elevators. Declan guides me inside the next available elevator, and we’re all alone as he presses the close door button.
He plants himself on the opposite side and stares at me while we ascend.
“You let another man touch you,” he grits out.
My core clenches at his brashness, something inside of me loving the fact that he is jealous.
“He was harmless,” I tell him and roll my eyes.
Before I know what’s happening, Declan is in my space. One hand circles my throat and the other grips my hip. His lips are a hair’s breadth away, and I’m waiting for his mouth to attack mine when the ping of the elevator signals we’re on our floor.
He blinks once before taking a step back, and I let out the breath I was holding.
Declan silently follows me out of the elevator toward my room, and when the door closes behind us, he tells me, “Change, and then we’ll get something to eat on our way.
” He’s back to being cordial, like he didn’t just get jealous of the fact that another man put his hand on my arm.
I don’t say anything as I grab an outfit and head into the bathroom. I make sure to put on some red lipstick and I freshen my hair with some dry shampoo, just in case we stay out all night and don’t come back to the hotel.
When I walk out into the room, Declan’s eyes go wide. “Oh, fuck no. You’re changing, now.”
I grab a pair of boots out of my suitcase. “No can do. This is my only going-out outfit.”
“Penny,” he growls. “Everyone is going to see your pussy.”
I laugh. “No, they’re not. I’m wearing spandex shorts.” I pull up my t-shirt dress to show him the tiny little shorts, and he groans.
I have on the black band t-shirt dress I wore the first time we had sex, but didn’t bring my knee-high boots because they’re not good for walking miles in. Instead, I have on combat boots and am wearing a pair of feather earrings and a bunch of silver rings stacked on my fingers.
I look good, if I do say so myself.
His eyes narrow, and I smirk back. It doesn’t escape me that we sort of match. He’s wearing a black t-shirt, dark jeans, and combat boots, too.
“I’m not going to a tattoo convention looking like I just walked out of The Little House on the Prairie, Declan.”
“But you’ll go looking like a slut?”
My eyes go wide, and I take a step toward him with a finger pointed at his chest. “Watch it. If I remember correctly, you enjoy it when I act like a so-called slut,” I say, anger lacing my tone. “What the fuck is your problem?”
He’s moody, and it’s giving me whiplash.
Declan erases the inches between us, and I have to crane my head to look up at him. “My problem is that you let another man touch you. My problem is that you have no problem looking like this for other men to see.” He waves a hand from my head to my feet.
I interrupt him before he can continue. “Newsflash, Declan. You’re my friend.
The shit you say when we’re naked together doesn’t count outside of the bedroom.
You and I will never happen, remember those words?
Those were your words, not mine. So don’t lecture me about who can touch me or what I can wear,” I seethe.
His nostrils flare, and I swear he’s either going to kill me or fuck me, but he does neither. Instead, he takes a step back and shoves his hands into his pockets. His eyes flick back and forth between mine, and my gaze doesn’t falter against his. “Okay,” he says. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
I let out a breath and reach for my black fringed cross-body bag. “Now, if you’re done acting like a child, let's go. And you’re buying me food and drinks by the way, for being so hot and cold the last few days.”
His lips twitch, but he doesn’t let out a smile. Instead, he nods once, and we head out of the room and down the elevator in silence. Once we hit the casino floor, he takes my hand in his. I look up at him, but he avoids my gaze.
I have no idea what’s going on with him, but it’s like he’s lost all sight of our original deal and the things he said on Christmas.
I want to ask him about it, but I fear what comes out of his mouth will destroy everything between us.
The tiny little box I’ve placed him in doesn’t need to open, because if it does, I don’t know if I can stop the feelings I’ve buried from coming to the surface.
We get a burger and a beer for the road and make our way down to the hotel where the tattoo convention is being held. When I finish my burger, Declan takes my hand in his again and doesn’t let go.
My heart skips a beat, but I stomp down my traitorous feelings. When we get to the hotel, there are dozens of heavily tattooed people hanging around. “Don’t let go of my hand, Penny.”
I nod, and he pulls me to where we give the attendant our tickets. “I need to buy a ticket,” I tell him.
“I got you one already.”
My mouth flounders open, but he hands the attendant his phone, and she scans it, giving us the okay to enter through the doors.
I don’t know why I’m shocked that Declan already purchased my ticket. It’s just like the zoo, and every other one of our outings over the last few months. I have to sneakily pay for things; otherwise, he won’t let me touch my wallet.
There are all walks of life milling about, and the amount of ink I see is intimidating.
Declan fits in here perfectly, and I can’t help but think I don’t belong here with him.
Why I’m all of a sudden insecure escapes me, but my mind goes to a place where Declan is with a heavily tattooed woman, who doesn’t have a kid, and I see them happily together without any baggage.
Being here confirms that Declan can only be my friend. We’re from two very different worlds, and this is nailing it home for me.
There was a very, very small part of me that thought maybe him taking me bare was his way of saying something, but now I know it wasn’t.
He went momentarily crazy and had a bad lapse in judgment.
There’s no way he would ever risk attaching himself permanently to me.
He can have so much more than a single mom.
He can have someone who isn’t tied down by a sordid past or keeping secrets from the people around her.
He pulls me through the crowd, and everyone, women and men, stare at him in awe. I don’t blame them, though. Between his yellow-green eyes, colorful tattoos, and tall stature, Declan isn’t just eye candy; he’s fuck-hot gorgeous.
“Declan,” a deep voice up ahead calls out. When we get closer, an attractive male, who’s tattooed much like Declan, smiles at him and comes in for a hug. “I’ve missed you, man,” he says with a backslap.
“I know. Sorry I haven’t reached out lately. I’ve been busy.”
The man looks at me and smirks. “I can tell. Who is this?” He reaches his hand out and I take it in mine for a shake.
“I’m Penny.” I give him a friendly smile, and he beams back with one of his own.
“My best friend,” Declan adds. He grabs my hand and intertwines our fingers together. My heart stalls because he’s never called me his best friend before. But I guess with how much time we’ve spent together and the things we’ve shared, I would say he’s my best friend, besides Jordan, too.