Chapter Seven
He stared at her as blinding recollections of the kids at school pushing her into lockers and hitting her books so she’d drop them came to him. How often had she been sore from a beating and had to deal with that? How could she go on every day, living the way she had?
And all that time, he’d whined because she hadn’t paid attention to him. Goddamn. He’d fucked up in so many ways he couldn’t count them.
“What are you thinking?” she asked.
“I was just thinking there is no way you'll ever forgive me.”
She looked perplexed. “Why do you want my forgiveness?”
He reached for her hand and gently rubbed his thumb over the back of it, and sighed.
“I haven’t finished my story. The first time I saw you, God, I can’t explain it.
It felt like you were supposed to be mine.
” He held up a hand when she opened her mouth.
“Let me finish. For a week, I tried to get your attention. Every time I tried to talk to you, you scurried off like you couldn’t stand me. ”
She shook her head. “That wasn’t it.”
“I know that now. At the time, it felt like my heart was broken. I know that sounds weird, but it’s true. I started getting angry at you.”
“And that’s why you started to call me ice princess and being mean to me?”
“Yes. I was a spoiled little rich kid who always got what he wanted, and when I couldn’t have you, the one thing I was ever desperate for, I threw a fit. It also got your attention, even though it was because of pain.”
He wiped a hand down his face. “When the kids saw how I treated you, they started it also, and it got out of hand. I tried to get them to leave you alone, but they thought I couldn’t stand you, so they kept at it.
I admitted my feelings for you to a few close friends and my dad.
They didn’t know what to tell me. So, I continued on the way I was, and I hurt us both because I was an asshole. ”
She relaxed back against the cushion and waited.
“Why did you leave before graduation?” he asked suddenly.
“Why would I subject myself to that when I didn’t need to?”
“You mean you didn’t go because of us ... me?”
She shrugged. “The ceremony didn’t matter anymore. Getting away was more important.”
He felt tears sting his eyelids and was shocked. He’d cried in his room after his father passed, but never in front of anyone. When he thought about it more, he was sadder about what he’d done to her than about his father's dying.
“I’m so fucking sorry, baby. I don’t know how to make up for it.”
She looked confused. “Why is this bothering you now?”
“It has bothered me every day of my life since it started. I just didn’t know how to stop it.
I came looking for you so many times over the years.
Before I left for college, I went to see you, and your mom always said you were still gone, and she didn’t know when you would be back.
I didn’t get a chance during school because I was across the country from you, and then when I graduated and came home, you still weren’t here.
My dad fell ill. He needed me to concentrate on the family business before he died.
I lost him about seven months after I came home.
Everything has been hectic since that time. ”
He’d been planning to find her when things settled, but fortunately, she’d saved time by coming home. Now he just had to keep her here.
“I really am sorry about your father.”
“Thank you, baby. What happened to yours? I never saw him when I stopped by.”
“He left shortly after I went to school one day and never returned. It was a godsend. I tried to get my mom to go with me when I went off to school, but she felt obligated to take care of him at first, and then after he left, she had the small ranch to take care of.”
“You never found out?” he asked.
Hanna shrugged. “I never cared enough to find out. How long ago did your mother die?”
“She’s not dead.”
Hanna looked surprised. “Oh, I’ve never heard about her. I guess I assumed she was dead.”
“No, she moved off the ranch when I was three or four. She hated everything about it. She lives in Texas somewhere, I think.”
“You mean she doesn’t visit?”
“No, baby, I haven’t seen her.”
“Did they ever divorce?”
“No. I’m not sure exactly why. I know she gets paid an allowance every month until she remarries.”
“I guess there is no normal family anymore, is there?”
He smiled and shook his head.
“Are we done with our talk?” she asked.
He saw how tired she was. “Would you stay if I gave you a bedroom so you could nap?”
She shook her head. “No, I really have to get back to the house.”
“Promise me you won’t leave. I still want to talk.”
She studied him for a moment. “I won’t leave without telling you.”
He stood and pulled her up. He stared down at her as he held onto her shoulders.
It always amazed him how pretty she really was.
Her light green eyes stood out on her pretty face.
She still had long dark hair, but now it was to the middle of her back.
Several inches shorter than she wore it in high school.
She was still slim but had filled out with delicious curves.
He wrapped an arm around her waist and was glad she didn’t pull away as they walked outside.
They were about to get in the truck when Blake yelled. “Bonzer, follow us in one of the trucks.”
“Wait,” she said and turned to him. “What are you doing?”
He turned, gripped her shoulders, and leaned down to say. “I’m going to drive you home and then ride back with Bonzer. I’m not going to let you drive, baby. You’re wiped out. Let me take care of you, please?”
She sighed and then nodded.
He lifted her into the passenger side seat and helped her put her seatbelt on before he went around and slid into the driver's seat.
He started the vehicle and then drove toward her house.
“Do you like what you do?”
She smiled and nodded. “Yes, very much. How about you?”
He was startled for a moment. “No one’s ever asked me that.”
“Why?”
“It was always understood I’d take over. I went to college for ranch management and then came home. My life has pretty much been mapped out for me since I was born.”
“Does it drive you crazy?” she asked.
He thought about it. “No, I think if I didn’t love the ranch so much, I might resent it. But I feel I’m where I’m supposed to be. How about you?”
“I enjoy what I do very much, but I don’t like living in a city.”
“If you could move back here, would you?”
“I’m not sure. I wouldn’t be able to live in the house. Too many bad memories. The fact I’d have to deal with my sister is another big drawback.”
He thought about how he could fix it so she could. He’d have to think about it some more.
They pulled up to the little house she grew up in. His head jerked to her when a moan slid from her. He followed her gaze and cursed.
The door was open, barely hanging on a hinge. From what he could see from where he sat, the inside had been demolished.
Blake got out and came around to help her down. He cursed under his breath when he felt how shaky she was.
“We’ll get this taken care of, baby. You’re not alone.” He grabbed her hand and walked them into the house.
It was demolished. Everything was broken. It looked like whoever did the vandalism took a sledgehammer to the walls, kitchen cabinets, and counter. Even the sink was dented.
“Holy shit. Who would do this?” Bonzer, his ranch hand, said when he came through the door.
“My sister.”