Chapter 20 Tatiana
TATIANA
The sound of water running pulls me from sleep. I reach across the bed and find empty sheets still warm from where Dimitri was lying. The shower's running in the bathroom and steam drifts through the open door.
Last night comes back in pieces—the pizza, our conversation about protecting Arseniy and my mother.
The way he kissed me and everything that followed.
We stayed up until almost two in the morning talking about everything and nothing at all, and my God, I think I've never felt so energized before in my life.
There's something magical about this connection I have with Dimitri that I never experienced before.
I push the blanket off and get out of bed.
My clothes are scattered across the floor and I leave them there as I walk toward the bathroom.
The mirror's completely fogged. I can barely see Dimitri's form through the shower glass, but what I see is enough.
His body is a work of art—chiseled muscle decorated in dark ink that celebrates everything he is and loves about life along with scars that tell the story of the lives he's lived.
I stand there watching him for a moment, and he doesn't seem to know I'm here yet.
It feels sort of sacred, like I'm seeing parts of him that he doesn’t usually let people see.
It's how I felt when he opened up last night and told me stories about growing up with Yuri as an older brother, knowing he would one day have to follow his orders.
But not once did Dimitri sound bitter or cynical about being "less than" his brother.
I think that respect is what makes me like him that much more.
Then he opens the shower door and looks directly at me. "Are you gonna stand there all morning looking beautiful or do you want to join me?"
The compliment puts a smile on my face, and I walk over and step into the shower before he can change his mind. He's lathered up, covered in suds and droplets of water, but it does nothing but add to the sight.
His chest is corded muscle, his thighs thick as tree trunks. And I'm one hell of a lucky woman that he's turned his sights on me, though it's taken me a long, bumpy road to finally come to this conclusion.
"Sleep well?" he asks, and I nod and lean into him, letting the spray roll over my skin and warm me.
"Did you?" I mumble, pressing kisses to his chest.
"The whole three hours I got. Yuri called and woke me up when he heard about my ordering men to the hospital.
I called on a few guys we have a bit closer to your mother.
They're on a plane now, and they'll be with your mother in a matter of hours.
" He kisses the top of my damp hair and says, "And we'll explain everything to her in a way that helps her not fear. "
I can't even respond to him because I'm too in awe of the power and resources he has. It makes me feel foolish for not trusting him from the beginning. All this time and if I had gone to him and not the police, he could’ve kept me out of it entirely.
I lay my head on his chest and listen to his heart beating and let the gratitude bring a smile to my face.
But the water is hot and the steam makes it hard to breathe. Dimitri picks up the soap and turns me around without asking. His hands wash my shoulders, then my arms, then down my back. When he's done with my body, he picks up the shampoo and works it through my hair.
"Why are you doing this?" I close my eyes as his fingers massage my scalp. It feels almost as good as a salon, though I haven't been able to afford a salon trip in ages.
"Doing what?" He rinses the shampoo out carefully.
"This…" The water runs down my face, over my chest and downward to the drain, and Dimitri's hands follow the flow, finding every nook and cranny and touching it sensitively.
"Lovers wash each other in the shower." He says it matter-of-factly. "This is what people do when they care about each other."
"No." I turn around to face him, half missing the fact that he said he cares about me.
But I make a mental note to return to that comment later.
"I mean why are you protecting me?" The lingering thought that Dimitri isn't above arranging this whole thing to force me into his arms has occurred to me a few times, and I need to know if he'd go that far. "Did you set me up?"
His hands are still on my shoulders. "Set you up?"
"The murder." I turn and search his face. He looks upset with me or accused. "Did you plan it knowing I'd be there hoping I'd run right to your arms in fear so you could 'protect' me?" I watch the muscle in his jaw work as he clenches his teeth and flares his nostrils.
"You think I'd kill someone just to get you into my bed?" Dimitri's voice is nothing but a growl, though I didn't mean to anger him. It makes me feel guilty instantly.
"I don't know," I say quietly as I bob one shoulder and avoid his eyes. "You've wanted me for months and I kept saying no. Now suddenly, I'm here, completely dependent on you."
Dimitri doesn't waste a second cupping both my cheeks and making me look up at him, and the tender man I know exists under that rough exterior is back in a flash.
"Since the moment I laid eyes on you, I've wanted you in my bed." His thumbs brush across my cheekbones. "That part is true. But I had nothing to do with Yakov's murder. The Kozlovs killed him to send a message. Your being there was terrible timing."
"How do I know you're telling the truth?" I watch his eyes because I need to know if he's lying.
"Because if I planned it, I would've done a better job of protecting you." His voice drops. "I wouldn't have let them break into your apartment to assault your roommate or hurt your cousin. I would've kept you safe from the beginning."
I know it sounds logical, but I don’t understand the one-eighty in his personality. "Then why go through all this trouble now?"
"Because now that you're here, you're mine." He pulls me closer and places a soft kiss on my lips. "And I take care of what belongs to me."
"So I'm just a possession?" It feels as insulting as it sounds. "Something you own?"
"No, you're not. It's just… complicated." He rests his forehead against mine. "I don't have better words right now. All I know is you're in my bed, under my protection, and that's where you're staying because it's where I want you."
"That's it?" I look up at him. "That's all you can say?"
"For now." His mouth hovers over mine. "Is that enough?"
Obviously, it's not enough for me, but I get it.
For a guy like him, maybe saying he likes me or that he wants me is too hard.
If telling me he wants my sex, me in his bed, whatever, is all he can do, then I have to try to be okay with that for now.
It isn't like he's forcing me to do anything.
Everything we've done has been consensual on both parts.
And he is protecting me and my family in a situation where I know without it, I could be in real danger.
Besides, I heard his slip earlier. He said showering together is what couples do when they care, Which means at some level, he knows he has some sort of feelings for me.
And when this has run its course and the threat is over, if he decides he's done with me, I can always move to the Ukraine alone.
It sounds sad, but I know not all things last.
"Yeah, it's, okay," I mumble halfheartedly, not really sure what I'm getting myself into.
He kisses me, and I let myself sink into it. His hands move to my waist and mine come up to his shoulders. The water pours over us while we stand there kissing, and though I'm still slightly confused and conflicted, I feel my body starting to respond to him.
His kiss deepens and my hands slide from his shoulders down his chest. The water makes his skin slippery under my palms and I can feel his heart beating rapidly. My fingers trace lower over his stomach and he groans into my mouth.
"Touch me." His voice is a growl against my lips.
I wrap my hand around him and he's already swelling. My fingers stroke slowly while we continue kissing and his hands slide up to cup my breasts. When his thumbs brush over my nipples I groan into his mouth.
"I need to be inside you." He backs me against the shower wall. "Right now."
The tile is cold on my back but his body is hot and I can't deny that I want him too.
He lifts me and I wrap my legs around his waist automatically.
One of his hands braces against the wall beside my head while the other grips the back of my thigh to hold me up.
It's a little shocking how strong he is, but my pussy doesn't care about anything but the throbbing dick prodding at me.
"Look at me" he grumbles as I reach between us and guide him toward my entrance. "I want to see your face."
I meet his eyes and he pushes inside slowly. The stretch makes me gasp and my fingers dig into his shoulders. He fills me completely and the angle has him hitting somewhere deep that makes my toes curl.
"You okay?" His jaw is tight like he's barely holding himself back, and I see the concentration on his face, the way his bicep next to my face is rock hard with tension as he balances us.
"Fuck yes," I groan, rocking my hips against him. "Fuck me."
He pulls out nearly all the way before thrusting back in hard, and I whimper as his mouth captures the sound with a kiss.
Every thrust is exquisite, lubed with my moisture and the water and entirely him.
I don't even have to hold on, but I do, with one arm around his neck while my hand furiously rubs my clit.
"God, you're so fucking hot." He adjusts his grip on my thigh. "I don’t think I'll ever get enough of you."
Dimitri kisses me again, biting my lip, and suddenly he's moving faster—harder.
Each thrust drives deeper than the last and I can't do anything except hold on while he takes what he wants.
I can barely catch my breath between kisses, and my core throbs so intensely I think I may lose control of my bladder when he finally makes my coil snap.
"You feel so good." His breathing is ragged against my neck. "So perfect like this."
"I can't…" I can barely form words. "It's too much." But my fingers don't stop their frantic circling of my swollen bud. Between the hot water and the juices he's drawing from me, my fingers barely stay on my clit and ever slide is torture.
"Yes, you can." He doesn't slow down. "I want to feel you come around me."
My fingers circle faster and his next thrust hits that spot inside that makes my vision blur. I'm right on the edge and barely holding on. My legs tighten around his waist and my nails dig into the back of his neck.
"Fuck," I moan, "I'm so close."
"Let go," he snarls before biting my neck, and the next thrust sends me over.
The climax tears through me, and I bite his shoulder while my whole body shakes. I can feel myself pulsing around him and it must push him over too because suddenly he's groaning and burying himself as deep as he can go.
His movements become erratic, and I feel him finish inside me. We're both trembling and gasping for air while the water continues to shower us, and my legs are shaking so badly, I don't know how I'm still holding on.
He stays inside me for several moments with his forehead pressed against mine. Both of us are breathing hard, and I can feel his heart pounding against my chest. Eventually, he pulls out slowly and carefully lowers me until my feet touch the tile.
My legs almost give out and he steadies me with his hands on my waist.
"Oh, my God, that was… holy fuck…" I lean against the wall for support and press my eyes closed.
"Yeah." Dimitri kisses my forehead. "It was."
He reaches for the soap and quickly washes himself off.
Then he hands it to me and steps under the spray to rinse.
The water runs clear down his body, and I watch him, feeling my entire perspective begin to shift.
I've had a few of these "awakening" moments with him, where I've seen him in a new light and my mind has changed about him, but never one this significant.
I'm falling in love.
And I don't want to stop.
"Rinse off," he says as he steps out of the shower and grabs a towel. "I have to go to work, but I'll be back with lunch later."
"You're leaving?" I take the soap and start washing quickly while trying not to sound disappointed. After that, I hoped we'd be able to lie in bed and talk a while. It doesn’t seem fair that we connect and then he has to rush off.
"I have meetings I can't reschedule." He dries himself as he looks up at me, and I can't hide my frown. "But I'll only be gone a few hours. Stay in the penthouse, and don't open the door for anyone except me or Gleb."
"I know the rules," I grumble, rinsing the soap off and turning off the water. "I'm not going to try running again."
"Good." He wraps a towel around his waist and hands me another one as I step out. "Because I'd hate to have to scrape you off the side of a building or some street somewhere."
He leaves the bathroom, and I hear him moving around the bedroom getting dressed.
I dry myself off slowly while staring at my reflection in the steamed-up mirror.
I feel like a stranger to myself. Since when do I let a man get me all boozed up and sweep me off my feet?
But that's exactly what he did, isn't it?
And it makes me smile.
"I'm leaving." Dimitri appears in the doorway fully dressed. "There's food in the kitchen if you're hungry. And don't forget to lock the door behind me."
"I won't." I clutch the towel around myself. "Be safe."
Something flashes across his face when I say that, and he crosses the bathroom and kisses me.
"I'll see you in a few hours." He's gone before I can respond.
He leaves me standing there watching and wondering how my life will change now. With the upheaval of the past month, I’m not sure I need more change, but if it looks anything like the past twenty-four hours has been, I might not mind.