Chapter 42
Sacrilege
THE REQUIEM | Past
Iam getting married.
I bunch the wedding gown in my fists and walk down the corridor leading to the chapel. The gown grows heavier with every stair I descend, and when I look down, the fabric is drinking the crimson on the floor.
I frown as the scent of copper floods my senses. “Selene…”
“Mama?”
I turn toward the sound, expecting to see her standing by the window, adjusting her pearls. Instead, I see shadows spilling from the wall like branches and skeletal fingers reach for the train of my gown.
I stumble back as the jasmines turn red, falling down into the crimson liquid that stains my gown.
“You can’t wash away what he did, Stina.”
I abruptly turn around to find Mama standing there, wearing a dress that mimics mine, but it is strange in colour. It’s not entirely red, but like someone has splashed red on white fabric. “Look what he did.”
She raises her hands. They’re red. Her smile turns cruel as she points to her chest where there’s now a big red stain as if she’s been stabbed there. “He killed me, Stina. Your husband killed me.”
Panic spikes, and I look down at my hands, my fists covered in the same blood, staining the lace gloves until they stick to my skin.
“No, no, no…” I whisper, shaking my head. “He won’t.”
I try to wipe them against the gown, but the more I rub, the more the blood spreads, climbing up my torso.
“Zagreus?” I call out.
“Look at yourself, Stina,” she hisses, the copper smell turning so thick I can taste it on the back of my tongue. “You made him kill me.”
The lace around my ribs tightens, squeezing the oxygen from my lungs, pulling me downward as the marble floor beneath my feet softens, turning into a bottomless pool of red. I scream, but no sound comes out, just a bubble of dark red escaping my lips as I sink into the floor.
A violent jolt snaps through my entire frame.
My eyes fly open, my chest heaving as I suck in a breath of real air. I am trembling so hard that my teeth click together.
I look around, trying to focus my blurred vision.
The chapel is gone. The bloody wedding dress is gone.
Mama is gone.
“Mama…” I whisper, swinging my legs off the couch as I reach for what I think is the door.
Everything’s blurry, I can’t focus, and I can’t breathe. “Stina…”
I whip my head around. “Mama?”
Mama, where are you?
She was just here. I can still see a smile on her face. I can still see her red hands pointing to the gruesome, bleeding tear in her chest.
Your husband killed me.
“No, she can’t die,” I sob, my vision fracturing as I stumble away from the door, spinning around in the center of the room. I claw at the collar, trying to tear it open, trying to force air into my suffocating lungs.
I can’t breathe.
Someone is laughing. When I turn to the window, I see Crystella standing there, smiling widely. Her eyes are hollow, and her wedding gown mimics mine.
“Told you, you should’ve come with us.”
“Selene!”
The shadows emerge from her sides.
When they reach me, I scream, throwing my hands up to shield my face, fully expecting the hollow-eyed nightmare to drag me under. “Don’t touch me! Get away from me!”
“Selene!”
Before I can take another step backward, a pair of hands wrap around my torso. I fight against the surrounding shadows, kicking and striking out blindly.
“Let me go!”
“Selene, stop! Look at me!”
A familiar voice roars through the panic in my head, but I don’t recognize it. Arms hook under my armpits, hoisting my thrashing body up and slamming my back flush against something soft. The shadows crowd me, trapping me.
I cry louder. “No, please, no! I didn’t kill you! I didn’t kill you!”
Rough hands move up, clamping firmly onto my cheeks. “Look at me, dammit!” the shadow above me growls, forcing me to open my eyes, and what I see are his stormy grey eyes burning into mine from inches away.
The haze slowly sways as I recognize the man above me.
Zagreus.
My husband.
His chest is heaving, his jaw set in a hard line as he stares down into my blown-out, unfocused pupils. “Focus on my voice, Dolcezza. Look at me. There is no one else here. You are safe. I have you.”
Panic twists and turns into this paranoid energy that overrides the safety of his grip. I shake my head violently against his palms, my eyes darting past his broad shoulders, scanning the room.
“Let me go,” I choke out, my voice high and reedy. “Zagreus, let me go, please!”
“Selene, stay still—”
“No!” I scream, twisting with desperation born of pure terror until I manage to slip past his stance.
I stumble blindly toward the window and press my hands and forehead against the cold glass, peering down into the dark abyss of the downtown sector, expecting to see a white dress, a pool of red, a body. Anything to make me believe it was real, and not just in my head.
Before my eyes can even focus on the blurred headlights below, arms wrap around my waist from behind. Zagreus hauls me back against his chest, lifting my feet off the floor.
“What the hell are you doing?” he demands as he holds me tight against his frame. “Look at me. What are you looking for down there?”
“She was just here,” I breathe, my fingers ripping through my hair. I pull at the strands, trying to clear the fog, trying to make him understand. “I saw her, Zagreus! She was standing right here in the room! The gown… the blood… she was real! She was standing right in front of me!”
Zagreus spins me around in his arms, forcing me to face him. “Who, Selene? Who was here?”
“Crystella,” I sob. “Mama was here too. Is she alive? I should go to her…”
I freeze, looking up into his face.
What am I even saying? Crystella is dead.
Zagreus is staring down at me. His stormy eyes are flickering between dark grey and black with a stillness that scares me more than any nightmare. His jaw is locked tight, his pupils dilated as he absorbs the absolute hysteria pouring out of me.
A cold splash of reality hits my face. I shut my mouth tight.
I’m blabbering nonsense. He thinks I’m insane.
He thinks his wife has finally lost her mind.
I drop my gaze, unable to hold his piercing stare for another second. The trembling in my limbs doubles.
Before I can spiral into shame, Zagreus closes the single inch of distance between us, grabbing the back of my waist and pulling me hard against his chest. One of his hands cups the back of my head, burying my face into the crook of his neck.
“No one is here, Dolcezza.”
I swallow, instinctively looking over his shoulder.
How do I tell him I still feel like someone is watching me?
Am I losing my mind? Am I going insane? I swear there was someone; how do I tell him…
There are so many things I want to say to him, but they die in my throat.
“Take me home,” I whisper instead, tired and hysterical. “Please, Zagreus. Just take me home.” His chest rises and falls against mine as he holds me tighter, his large hand smoothing down my hair.
“We’re going home, Dolcezza,” he rasps against my ear. “We’re going home right now, but before that, we are going to see a doctor.”