40~I never hated you
"Najib... you can't get on that plane." Her trembling lips barely formed the words. "Please, Ya Allah... don't let him leave."
Fear tightened around her chest.
The fear of arriving at the airport only to discover he was already gone.
The fear of never getting the chance to tell him how she truly felt.
The fear of spending the rest of her life regretting that she had pushed him away over and over again.
Most terrifying of all...
The fear of losing him forever.
Her heartbeat thundered in her ears as she pressed harder on the accelerator.
Ordinarily, the journey to the airport took almost an hour.
Tonight, she made it in thirty minutes.
With a sharp screech, the car came to an abrupt stop in the parking lot. She barely remembered turning off the engine. Whether she had locked the doors or not never crossed her mind.
The only thing that mattered was finding Najib.
She ran toward the airport entrance.
The moment she reached the gate, a security officer stepped in front of her.
"Ma'am, are you a passenger?" The woman asked, studying Hanan suspiciously from head to toe.
Only then did Hanan glance down at herself.
She was still wearing her pajamas.
Her hair was uncovered.
She had rushed out without even putting on shoes.
"Oh, God..." She whispered under her breath as shame washed over her. Curious stares followed her from every direction.
"Ma'am, I'm here to see someone. Please... just let me through."
"You didn't answer my question." The officer's voice remained firm. "Where's your luggage?"
"I... I'm not travelling." Hanan struggled to steady her breathing. "I only came to find someone. Please, it's urgent."
The woman frowned.
"Looking like this?"
That single question snapped the last thread of Hanan's patience.
"Please!" She cried, desperation creeping into her voice. "Someone I love is about to leave. Can you please let me pass?"
The officer stared at her for a brief moment before stepping aside.
"Go. But I'll be watching you."
Hanan didn't wait for another word.
She rushed inside.
Her eyes swept across every row of seats.
He's not here.
She searched another section.
Still nothing.
She circled the departure lounge once.
Twice.
Three times.
No sign of him.
Her breathing became uneven.
"Ya Allah..." She whispered, panic settling deeper into her chest. "Where are you Najib?"
Her gaze drifted toward the boarding gates beyond the glass walls where the aircraft stood waiting on the runway.
"Has he already left...?"
The thought made her feet itch to run toward the gates.
But the security officer's watchful eyes kept her rooted where she stood.
Just then...
"Hanan!"
Her heart lurched.
She spun around instantly, her face filled with hope.
For one glorious second, she thought it was Najib.
It wasn't.
"Amira?"
A bit of relief flickered across Hanan's tear stained face the instant she recognized her friend.
"Hanan!" Amira waved before her smile quickly faded into confusion as she observed Hanan's appearance. She hurried over.
"Hanan... I'm so happy to see you. I owe you so many apologies, but... why are you dressed like this?"
"Amira..." Hanan grabbed her arm desperately. "I don't have time to explain. Please... tell me, has any plane taken off yet?"
"Yes... but which flight are you talking about?"
Hanan froze.
Her heart sank.
She didn't even know where Najib was flying to.
"Ya Allah..." She whispered, her gaze drifting helplessly toward the boarding gates.
"What happened?" Amira asked, worry spreading across her face. "Why do you look so scared? Did you miss your flight?"
"I..." Hanan's lips trembled. "I lost him."
The words barely left her mouth before the dam of tears finally broke.
"I just lost the man I love..." She sobbed. "And it's all my fault."
She burst into tears.
Not the quiet kind.
She cried with the helplessness of someone who believed she had just lost the most precious person in her life forever.
People passing by slowed their steps, throwing curious glances in their direction.
Amira immediately pulled her into a hug.
"Hey... hey, stop crying." She gently wiped the tears streaming down Hanan's cheeks.
"Is this about Najib?"
The mention of his name only made Hanan cry harder.
"Yes..." She nodded repeatedly. "Najib has gone... What do I do now?"
"First, breathe." Amira held both her shoulders. "Come on, let's get out of here."
She guided Hanan outside toward the parking lot.
Even as they walked, Hanan kept looking over her shoulder, hoping that she would somehow catch sight of him.
Nothing.
Every passing second felt like another door closing.
She buried her face against Amira's shoulder, crying so hard that the words leaving her mouth was not audible.
Amira sighed sadly.."Do you have his number?"
Hanan looked up."Yes."
"Then use my phone. Call him."
Hanan quickly wiped her tears.
"Thank you, Amira."
With trembling fingers, she accepted the phone and hurriedly typed Najib's number.
The call connected.
Almost instantly...
A familiar ringtone echoed nearby.
Hanan frowned.
Then she heard it.
Not through the phone.
But behind her.
"Hello?"
Her entire body stiffened.
That voice...
"Najib?"
She slowly turned around.
There he was.
Standing beside his car.
His suitcases rested neatly at his feet while his phone remained pressed against his ear.
For a long moment...
Neither of them moved.
Neither of them spoke.
They simply stared.
As though the entire world had disappeared around them.
Amira glanced from Hanan to Najib.
Their eyes alone were carrying on a conversation she couldn't interrupt.
A small smile found its way onto her lips.
"Hanan..." She spoke softly. "I'll leave you two alone. We'll talk later."
She quietly walked away.
Hanan didn't even notice her leaving because her eyes and attention were glued on Najib.
Slowly, she walked towards him while glancing at the luggage beside him.
"Are you leaving?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Najib looked down briefly before meeting her eyes again.
"I was supposed to."
A sad smile tugged at the corner of his lips.
"But I couldn't."
"Why?"
He let out a shaky breath.
"Because every step I took toward that departure gate felt wrong."
He smiled painfully.
"I kept thinking... if I boarded that plane, I would spend the rest of my life regretting while wondering what would've happened if I stayed and fought for us..."
He took one slow step toward her.
"So I cancelled my flight... I came back because I wanted one last chance, one last chance to ask for your forgiveness."
"One last chance to prove that I can become the man you deserve."
Then he paused. "And you?"
His eyes searched hers. "Why are you here?"
Fresh tears welled in Hanan's eyes.
She smiled through them. "I was terrified."
Her voice trembled. "I thought you already left... I thought I lost my chance to tell you how I truly feel."
She took a shaky breath. "I told you last night... but you probably never heard me."
"So listen to me now."
She stepped closer.
"I don't think you're pathetic."
"I don't think you're a heartless murderer."
"I don't think you're a monster."
"I don't think you're any of those horrible things I called you."
She lowered her head.
"I'm sorry, I went too far, you never deserved those harsh words."
Najib stared at her in disbelief. "You mean that?"
His voice was so faint it almost disappeared into the night.
She nodded. "I do."
She wiped away another tear.
"I honestly don't know how I convinced myself I hated you."
"Maybe it was the anger."
"Maybe it was my thirst for revenge."
"But beneath all of that..." She smiled weakly. "I never stopped loving you, Najib."
His eyes widened.
She continued. "Do you remember the night of our wedding reception, the first day we met on your balcony?"
A faint smile appeared on his face. "I do."
"I barely knew you then Najib... All I knew was that I had met a man who was kind and sweet... A man who called me Cinderella."
"And that man..."
She laughed softly through her tears.
"Turned out to be you."
She shook her head.
"That was the moment I fell for you."
"And so many times I tried to hate you."
"I tried to erase you from my heart."
"God knows I tried convincing myself that loving you was a mistake."
"But it never worked."
She slowly closed the distance between them.
"So I came here to tell you that you were right."
"I never stopped loving you."
"I never could."
"I love you so much, Najib."
Silence.
Najib simply stood there staring at her.
His briefcase slipped from his hand and landed softly on the ground.
His eyes shimmered with tears.
She smiled nervously.
"Why aren't you saying anything?"
Her voice shook.
"Please... Say something."
Najib swallowed hard.
"If you take one more step..."
His voice came out rough with emotion.
"I swear... I'm never letting you go again."
A tear rolled down Hanan's cheek.
"I want that."
She smiled.
"I want to be yours forever."
That was all he needed to hear.
Before she could blink...
He crossed the distance between them.
His arms wrapped tightly around her as though he feared she would disappear again.
And then...
His lips crashed against hers.
With tears of joy streaming down her cheeks, Hanan kissed him back just as desperately.
Her fingers buried themselves in his hair pulling him even closer, pouring every unsaid apology, every ounce of longing, and every piece of her heart into the kiss.
Neither of them wanted to let go.
They only parted when the lack of air forced them to.
Their foreheads rested against each other, their breaths mingling as they tried to steady their racing hearts.
Najib smiled through watery eyes.
"I love you even more, Habibti."
He let out a soft laugh.
"I loved you back then... and I love you even more now."
His thumb gently brushed away the tears on her cheek.
"I was just too good at pretending I wasn't hopelessly in love with you."