44~Can you not hate me now that Im dead?
The hospital bed was barely wide enough for one person.
Yet Najib looked at the tiny space beside him as though it were more than enough.
"Come here." He stretched out his hand toward her.
Hanan glanced from his hand to the bed.
"Where?"
"Here." He patted the narrow space beside him. "Join me."
She laughed softly. "I'll be fine on the chair."
"But the chair isn't meant to be slept on."
"And this bed isn't meant for two people." She sighed.
"It is tonight."
She shook her head, smiling. "Najib..."
"You can lie on me." He smiled.
Her eyes widened.
"Huh...?"
Heat rushed to her cheeks.
She instinctively glanced around the room as if someone else was hearing them, but the room was empty except for the two of them.
He noticed immediately. "Are you shy?"
"What? No."
His smile widened. "Then come here."
She remained on her chair.
He pretended to sit up.
"Or should I come and carry you?"
"No!" She blurted, quickly standing up.
"I'll come."
It was only a few steps from the chair to the bed.
Yet somehow...
Those few steps felt like the longest walk of her life.
She stopped beside him, still hesitating.
"Najib... we're in a hospital."
"So?"
"We're not supposed to share a bed."
Without answering, he caught her wrist and gently pulled her toward him.
She let out a tiny gasp as she landed against his chest.
One of his arms wrapped around her waist.
The other settled behind her back, holding her securely against him.
Their legs entangled together in the little bed space.
Hanan secretly smiled.
The position should have been uncomfortable... Instead, it felt strangely perfect.
"I don't have a contagious disease, do I?" He murmured against her hair. "It's only a head injury."
She smiled to herself. "That's not the point."
"Then what's the point?"
Her cheeks grew even warmer.
"We're not married yet."
She said it so quietly he almost missed it.
"What?"
She immediately shook her head.
"Nothing."
She gently lifted her head from his chest.
"No, you're the patient."
She carefully adjusted their position until his head rested against her shoulder instead.
"You should be the one lying on me."
Najib looked up at her, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
"I could get used to this."
Hanan laughed softly, brushing a few strands of hair away from his forehead.
"Don't."
"Too late."
He intertwined his fingers with hers.
"I already have."
Cradling his head against her shoulder, Hanan gently adjusted him into a more comfortable position.
Najib smiled to himself before shamelessly sliding lower until his head rested against her bosom.
Their sudden closeness instantly made her body tense.
"Najib..." She whispered, her cheeks warming.
"Hmm?"
"You're too comfortable."
"I know." He replied without the slightest intention of moving his head away from her chest.
She let out a helpless laugh, unable to stop the blush creeping into her face.
Their legs were tangled beneath the thin hospital blanket, their feet brushing against each other every now and then. His toes playfully nudged hers, making her smile despite herself.
Wrapping an arm around her waist, he drew her closer until there wasn't any space left between them.
Hanan's fingers instinctively found their way into his neatly braided hair, gently combing through each braid.
A comfortable silence settled between them.
She found herself absentmindedly playing with his hair.
"I want to know..." She murmured.
"Hmm?"
"Why do you braid your hair now?"
Najib chuckled.
"So that's what you wanted to ask?"
She smiled sheepishly. "I'm just curious, because you don't braid before."
He tilted his head just enough to look up at her again.
"You don't like it?"
"It's not that." She shook her head quickly.
"I actually think you looked better with a low cut."
He stared at her for a few quiet seconds before resting his head back against her.
"What?" She laughed. "Why did you look at me like that?"
"I honestly thought you preferred the braids."
"I don't dislike them."
She gently tugged one braid.
"I just think low cut suits you more."
He smiled softly.
"I would've kept it that way if I had a choice."
Her fingers stopped moving.
"What do you mean?"
He sighed.
"After my accident three years ago, I had a surgery on my head."
He unconsciously touched the side of his scalp.
"The stitches healed... but they left a noticeable scar."
"I didn't like looking at it."
"So I grew my hair to cover it."
"And once it became long enough..."
"I started braiding it."
Realization crossed her face.
"Oh..." Her heart tightened. "Does it hurt?"
"It used to but not anymore." He smiled reassuringly. "It's just a scar now."
She gently brushed her fingertips over one of the braids, seeing the hidden scar beneath.
"I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"For not being there."
His brows furrowed.
"The accident happened the same day I left for America."
Her voice was quiet.
"I heard about it... But I didn't even feel sorry for you then."
She laughed bitterly at herself.
"I was too angry."
"If I could go back... I think I would've stayed beside you until you recovered, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you."
Najib slowly reached for her hand.
"You don't owe me an apology, Habibti."
He kissed the back of her hand.
"Back then, I deserved every ounce of your anger."
She lowered her eyes.
"No... I don't think anyone deserves to suffer alone."
He smiled sadly.
"It was difficult."
"I lost some of my memories after the accident."
"It took months before everything felt normal again."
"But strangely... I've never regretted going through that difficult phase of my life."
She looked at him curiously. "Why?"
"Because it changed me for good." He smiled thoughtfully.
"I stopped taking people for granted."
"I quit smoking and drinking."
"My Iman grew, I became closer to Allah."
"And..."
His gaze softened as it met hers.
"I fell hopelessly in love with someone I thought I had lost forever."
A shy smile spread across her face. "Alhamdulillah..."
He nodded. "Alhamdulillah."
He intertwined his fingers with hers.
"Sometimes I still wake up wondering if our reunion is a dream."
"If someone had told me a year ago that I would be lying in your arms again... I would've laughed."
She smiled warmly. "I understand."
"When we met again... I barely recognized you."
"You changed so much."
She gently cupped his cheek.
"And honestly... I'm proud of the man you've become."
His lips curved into a smile. "And you? Did you think now was ever possible back then?"
She looked around the small hospital room before looking back at him.
"No. I never imagined I would enjoy sharing a tiny hospital bed with you..."
She laughed softly.
"But... I love this."
"What exactly do you love?" He teased.
She leaned her forehead against his.
"Us, the way we are right now."
He grinned. "But I thought you were shy just now."
"I wasn't. Not at all."
He raised an amused eyebrow. "But I thought you were shy. You didn't want to leave your seat just now." He smiled.
"Who said I was shy? I wasn't." Hanan huffed, refusing to meet his eyes.
She was lying.
Of course she had been shy.
They were in a hospital. Anyone could walk in at any moment, a doctor, a nurse, Mr Charles, Abdul. The thought alone had made her heart race. Yet somehow, now that she was beside him, none of it seemed to matter as much. All she cared about was that he was alive and safe in her arms.
"If you weren't shy then why did it take you almost half a minute to walk from the chair to the bed?"
She froze. "You counted?"
"Every second."
She buried her face against his shoulder to hide another blush.
"I hate you."
His laughter filled the quiet hospital room. "No, you don't."
"No..." She admitted with a smile. "I really don't."
He chuckled. "I'll pretend to believe you weren't shy."
"I wasn't shy!"
"Fine!" He raised both hands in surrender.
"I have another question." Hanan smiled.
"I'm listening."
She absentmindedly twirled one of his braids between her fingers.
"I was surprised to see you back. I thought you already left for Paris."
"How could I leave knowing you were in danger?"
Her fingers froze.
"But... how did you know?"
"My uncle called before I reached the airport. He told me Faruk had kidnapped you."
"He did?"
"You sound surprised."
"I am." She frowned thoughtfully. "Faruk kept saying his father hated him. I never believed him... but hearing this makes me wonder."
Najib shook his head.
"No, Habibti. Uncle loves Faruk. He's his only son. Everything he ever did, even the mistakes came from wanting the best for him. Faruk only chose to see rejection where there was concern."
He sighed softly. "And honestly... I'm grateful Uncle called me. If he hadn't..."
His voice faded.
"I don't even want to imagine what could've happened."
Hanan lowered her gaze.
"I'm grateful too."
A quiet silence settled between them.
"But..." She whispered.
"What is it?"
"I feel very guilty."
He looked at her.
"Maman Faruk already warned me."
Her voice trembled.
"She said she won't forgive me if anything happens to her son. I ruined her son... I destroyed his life. The more I think about everything that's happened... the more I wonder if she's right."
Najib slowly sat up and turned fully toward her.
Taking both of her hands into his, he gently rubbed circles across her knuckles.
"Look at me."
She did.
"You are not responsible for another person's bad choices."
"But..."
"No." His voice was calm but firm. "You trusted Faruk. You gave him chances to accept the truth. He chose obsession instead of acceptance."
She remained silent.
"You didn't betray him."
"I still feel like I did." She sighed.
"You ended a relationship that wasn't right for you."
He squeezed her hands gently.
"That isn't betrayal, Habibti."
Her eyes began to glisten.
"He kidnapped you."
"He threatened your life."
"He tried to murder people."