Chapter Two
Dee’s tests came back, and two days later, they started bringing her out of the induced coma. They removed the ventilator tube and did a bunch of other stuff I can’t even remember.
Everything from the past week is a blur.
I’m sitting here, holding Dee’s hand like always, but the stark difference now is watching her chest rise and fall on its own, no ventilator tubes rammed down her throat.
It’s a step forward.
My nose hurts, and I’m black and blue, but at least Ford’s being civil. That’s something. I know he still doesn’t like me, but at least he’s being considerate and no longer blaming me.
Not that it matters. I haven’t stopped blaming myself.
I exhale, gently tracing circles over her hand with my thumb.
Her skin isn’t as cold, and there’s a little more color in her cheeks.
Dee’s fighting, and the doctors say she could wake up any day now.
The swelling in her brain has diminished.
Thankfully, it wasn’t as bad as they’d originally thought.
So… that’s something.
I let out a breath. I’m so damn tired. Sleeping in a chair’s no way to live, but I’m not leaving her side.
Not now. Not when she could open her eyes at any moment.
I even leave the bathroom door open so I can keep watch.
The nurses don’t like it, but I don’t give a fuck.
I won’t risk missing the moment my girl wakes up.
Picking up her hand, I kiss it tenderly. “I miss you,” I whisper before I lean down and kiss her cheek. I rest my head on her forehead and close my eyes, just taking in her scent.
“Mmm…” The sound is faint, and it has me opening my eyes quickly and wide.
Sitting back, I focus on her. “Dee?” I ask, my heart rate spikes, and my breathing stops.
She moans again, and I smile brightly, not because she’s obviously in pain but because I think she is waking up. Finally.
“Dee, can you hear me?” I question, and she moves her fingers slightly.
Excitement floods through me as I stroke her hair, kissing her forehead and then her hand repeatedly.
“I’m right here, baby. I love you,” I say as her free arm moves, and she clenches at her abdomen, moaning slightly again.
I think she’s in pain, so I press the call button for the nurse.
“C’mon, open your eyes,” I whisper, and I watch her eyelids intensely.
The nurse comes in, but my gaze never leaves Dee. I can’t take my eyes off her, not now. I want to be the first thing she sees when she rouses.
“Everything okay, Colt?” Shannon queries.
“I think she’s waking up,” I tell her, and Shannon walks over, checking her stats.
“C’mon, Dee,” I whisper again, stroking her hair.
When she groans, Shannon smiles. “Won’t be long now, Colt,” she says, and my eyes fill with tears.
I watch Dee’s eyelids start to flicker, causing my heart to flutter. I can’t help but hold onto her hand tightly. She moans again and shifts her body infinitesimally, but I know she moved.
I’m sure of it.
“No, Dee, try to stay still, honey,” Shannon says, putting her hands on Dee’s legs to stop her from moving around. She whimpers, and I suddenly feel like perhaps something is wrong. All my happiness and elation turn to dread immediately.
“Shannon?” I question, and she looks at me and nods.
“It’s okay, Colt. All of this is normal. She’s going to be quite confused when she wakes up. She may even be irritated. So prepare yourself for that,” Shannon replies, and I slowly dip my head in understanding.
“She’s been through a lot. I can understand a little irritation,” I reply.
Dee’s movements and moaning stop. It seems she’s gone back to sleep, so I sit back down on the chair with her hand in mine, afraid to let go.
“I’ve given her some more pain relief. Hopefully, that helps, but it might make her sleep for a little longer,” Shannon informs, then walks around and pats my shoulder. “You’re doing great, Colt,” she assures before turning and walking out.
I sit, staring at Dee for what feels like hours. My nerves are shot, and I know I need a break, but I’m not leaving her. Not ever.
So I lean back in the chair and shut my eyes, even if just for a moment.
Something shifts.
A subtle movement pulls me back to reality when Dee’s hand stirs in mine. My eyes snap open.
I bolt upright, staring at her. Her eyelids are flickering. My chest tightens, adrenaline surging.
“Dee, I’m right here. Open your eyes if you can hear me,” I plead, voice cracking with hope.
Her fingers squeeze mine. Then—her eyes shoot open.
For a second, I forget to breathe. Those beautiful green eyes lock onto mine, and I’m completely undone. I reach out, gently caressing her cheek as a tear rolls down my face.
“Hey, baby,” I whisper. “Can you hear me?”
Dee continues to stare at me but doesn’t say anything. I gaze at her, pleading with my eyes for her to speak. But she doesn’t.
“Dee?” I whisper before I lean down and kiss her lips. She doesn’t kiss back.
She is lifeless in front of me, but the only difference now is her eyes staring into mine. It gives me an eerie feeling, so I press the call button, my eyes never leaving hers.
“I love you, Dee. I love you so fucking much.” I rest my forehead against hers and look deeply into her eyes, welling up with tears.
Is she in pain?
And why the fuck can’t she talk?
There’s got to be something wrong.
Shannon walks in. “Is she awake?” she asks as she walks over to the bed.
“I don’t know?” I reply honestly and pull my forehead from Dee’s. Her eyes follow me as I straighten. “She’s awake, but she’s not talking. That’s not normal, right?” I whisper so Dee can’t hear me. The last thing I want to do is freak her out more.
Shannon turns to Dee and flashes a light into her eyes. Immediately, Dee shuts her eyes against the brightness but doesn’t protest aloud, and a sinking feeling hits my chest.
Why the fuck can’t she talk?
“That’s not normal, right?” I repeat, and Shannon shakes her head.
“It can happen, Colt. She’s still trying to wake up, but all of her functions may not come back at once.
It’s okay. Try not to worry. Just reassure her and be here while she has her eyes open.
She probably won’t stay awake for long and will more than likely not even remember,” Shannon tells me, and I nod, all the while my eyes are still fixated on Dee’s.
Shannon walks over and squeezes my shoulder. “You’re doing great,” she reassures me again and leaves me once more.
I exhale and caress Dee’s cheek. When her eyes close momentarily, I start to panic.
“Dee?” She opens her eyes again, and a tear falls down her face.
I instantly wipe it away with my thumb, then lean down and kiss her lips.
She doesn’t kiss back, but I don’t care.
As long as she keeps looking at me, I’m happy.
“I love you so much. You have no idea, Dee. Don’t worry.
I’m going to be here every step of the way to get you better.
You can count on me, baby,” I tell her and raise her hand, kissing it again.
Her mouth twitches, and I focus on her lips as they try to turn into a smile.
I exhale and can’t stop the tears that flow.
I feel like such a sissy, but I smile as brightly as I can and kiss her lips again.
“I-I love y-you,” I stammer through a sob, and she smiles this time fully, then closes her eyes and exhales.
I caress her cheek, willing her eyes to open for me again, but her hand loosens in my grip, and I know she’s fallen asleep.
Exhaling loudly, I sit in the chair.
That was intense.
Dee was looking right at me, and I could finally see she was there. It must be so frustrating for her not to be able to talk. I wish this were all over, and we could start moving forward with our life together.
Over the next few hours, Anna and Johnny visit, bringing me food, for which I’m thankful. Then Dee’s parents make an appearance. After I explained everything that happened with Dee, their feelings matched mine. A sense of relief mixed with equal frustration.
It’s late in the day when they leave.
Hux enters with a fresh set of clothes. “You really need to shower, bro. You’re beginning to smell worse than the hospital,” he jokes while chuckling.
“Fuck off! You know I’m not leaving her side.”
He shakes his head. “Okay, seriously, it’s been over a week.
You need a shower. I’ll stay here with Dee, and you can leave the bathroom door wide open so you can watch her from the shower if you like.
You know I’ll call you if anything happens.
C’mon, Colt, you need to start looking after yourself.
You’re probably knocking her out with your stench, so the quicker you shower, the quicker she will wake up,” Hux quips, and I punch him in the arm, then lift my arm to sniff my pit.
“Fuck, I really do stink,” I admit, and proceed to have an internal debate about whether I should leave her side or not.
“I don’t think I can leave her. What if she wakes up again?” I question as I stroke her hair.
“Then I will call you. Leave the door open. Just shower!” Hux demands as he points to the bathroom. I exhale in defeat while I stand, then lean into Dee, kissing her softly.
“I’ll just be in the other room. I haven’t left you. I never will,” I whisper and kiss her again.
It takes all of my strength to let go of her hand.
After hesitating for another minute, I finally grow the balls to let go.
I feel like such a dick, but Hux is right.
My smell is offensive, and I’m sure the nursing staff will appreciate it if I have a shower.
So I walk into the bathroom, leaving the door wide open.