Chapter 22
Alina
“I missed you so fucking much. How are you here? Am I dreaming?”
Dominik’s questions are good ones, but I don’t have an answer to them.
Something snapped in Gavriil after…what we did in the shower. Guilt churns in my stomach, sour and violent, as I think about it.
I betrayed Dominik by letting Gavriil touch me like that, by touching him. At first, I wanted to hurt him, but then I couldn’t stop. It always feels like I’m caught under some sort of spell when I’m around Gavriil. I get swept up in what he makes me feel, even if I don’t want to feel those things.
Maybe he sent me here to make me feel bad, to punish me with Dom’s eyes, with what he knows I won’t be able to confess.
Dominik cups my face in his hands, his eyes roaming over me like he can read the betrayal under my skin. “What’s wrong?”
Does he somehow know?
I don’t answer. I can’t.
Instead of saying what I know will only push him away, I do what I’ve wanted to do for a long time now.
I lift up onto my toes and press my lips against his.
My fingers twist into the hair at the nape of his neck like I’m anchoring myself to the only thing that’s ever felt safe. I’ve missed him so damn much.
Dominik melts into me like he’s been starving too. His hands slide up my back to hold me close. When he feels a flash of tongue against his bottom lip, begging to be let in, he pauses.
“There’s a camera in here,” he warns, his breath ragged. “Gavriil could be watching. Or a guard.”
Heat flickers low in my stomach. I hope he’s right.
I want Gavriil to watch us and choke on the sight. I want him to feel jealous, to hate every second of seeing me willingly touch Dom without any manipulation.
“I don’t care,” I whisper to him before kissing him again, desire flooding my veins as his tongue teases mine. I need something that’s mine, even if it’s only for a minute.
Finally, we have nothing holding us back. No injury. No separation. Nothing.
For one breath, it feels like we’re free.
“Fuck,” Dominik breathes out as I slip my hands up underneath his shirt. “No, wildcat. Not here.” His forehead presses to mine similar to the way Gavriil’s did just minutes ago. “Not in my brother’s prison.”
Disappointment floods me. “He could take me away at any moment and I may not get to come back.”
Dominik shakes his head and takes my hands. “He won’t always come between us.”
Easy for him to say.
“Let me just hold you,” he says before he kisses me again deeply, his hands roaming over my body, not to caress and tease but as if to assure himself I’m really here. That I’m safe.
I don’t deserve his protection after what just happened.
But it feels so good to be touched by him again. The thought of Gavriil fades to the very back of my mind as Dominik guides me down to his mattress.
“Come here,” he says. Grabbing the backs of my thighs, he lifts me so that I’m straddling his waist. Instead of making it a provocative position, one promising more to come, he just holds me to his chest and strokes his palm over my damp hair.
“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” he rasps, and it sounds like a confession as he presses a kiss to my temple.
I attempt to smile at him, my heart aching. “I’ve missed you too.”
Dominik places kisses into my hair. “How have you really been dikaya koshka?”
“Surviving,” I answer honestly. That’s what it feels like. Earlier with Gavriil was just about surviving too, right?
I can’t make myself accept the lie, so I know Dominik won’t buy it either.
“How about you?” I ask him.
“It doesn’t matter. Not when you’re here with me now.”
That probably means it’s been bad. I should’ve known Gavriil wasn’t keeping his promise. I plan to confront him about that as soon as I see the asshole.
Still, for a few moments, everything feels so normal between us. Well, as normal as they could possibly be.
We may be in a cell, but Dom’s arms make my body forget.
It’s just him and me. I missed that.
But Gavriil still tries to haunt my thoughts like a shadow at the edge of the room. A handprint on my skin.
“I don’t know why you’re here; I’m glad that you are.”
“Me too,” I agree, my throat tightening. “But…there’s something you should know.”
Dominik pulls back to look at my face with a frown. “What’s going on?”
The words get stuck. I can’t even form them.
I know I should tell him, but I can’t. Not when I haven’t even had time to wrap my head around what the hell just happened. So, I give him a different truth instead. “There’s, um, there have been attacks by the Irish.”
“Fuck,” Dominik mutters. “I knew that there were attacks but not who or why. Gavriil won’t talk to me about any fucking thing.”
I quickly tell him everything that I heard at Gavriil’s meeting. The plans. The attacks. I also tell him about Leon and Nazar and what happened earlier today.
“Why is he shifting our defenses so much?” Dominik sighs as he runs his hand through his hair, looking stressed. “He’s not thinking ahead. He’s reacting. Lashing out.”
“He seemed upset today about Nazar betraying him and what he said. As upset as he’ll let himself appear,” I tell him, remembering the way Gavriil viciously sliced the man’s throat. The blood dripping from his hand before he touched my face, then touched himself…
Dominik shakes his head. “He needs to stop making mistakes before he gets everyone killed. Including himself.”
I don’t know what Gavriil should be doing, but I’m sure Dominik knows.
“He hasn’t told you anything?”
“No, and I don’t care,” Dominik mutters. “Not really. Only enough to make sure you’re still safe here.”
“He’s been letting me see what’s going on,” I tell him. “He let me sit in on his meeting and then the interrogation…”
Dominik lifts my hand to his lips and places a kiss on it.
“You’ll have to be my eyes and ears up there, dikaya koshka.
I don’t know when we’ll see each other again, but if things keep getting worse, and I assume they will, then we need to leave before this war ends up on our doorstep.
What you find out may help get us all out of here faster. ”
He’s always plotting, planning. And now he’s giving me a purpose. It steadies me more than I care to admit.
War is coming for Gavriil and the Bratva, but Dom is more worried about me. About us.
I should do the same.
Determination surges within me as I finally have a task to focus on. A goal in mind.
I don’t know if Gavriil wants me to actively observe what’s going on, but that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Why else would he want me to sit in on a meeting?
But will Dominik really leave Gavriil to die? A few days ago, I would’ve been all for that plan. Now, though, maybe I can convince Dominik to offer Gavriil his help at least with strategy if not fighting the Irish. I don’t want him to turn his back on his brother completely.
“I’ll find out everything I can,” I promise him.
“Good girl,” he says with a smile that breaks my heart as he pushes a lock of my damp hair behind my ear.
Dominik and I sit and talk for hours until our eyes are heavy. We eventually lie down on his mattress together, facing each other with our hands joined.
“Tell me the truth, Alina. Are you really okay?” Dominik asks quietly. “How…cruel has he been to you?”
I swallow hard, feeling a wave of emotions threatening to crash down on me. That question hits me harder now after everything that I’ve been through.
“It’s more what he says that’s cruel than what he does,” I admit. “Gavriil knows I miss my brother. That I miss you, but I was also angry with you for pulling the trigger. Lately, he’s been more erratic. I never know what he’s going to do or say. I don’t even think he knows half the time.”
Dominik nods. “It does sound like he’s more rattled than usual.”
I lower my eyes. “One of the guards made comments about him treating me differently.”
“You’re distracting him, and that’s not a good thing,” Dominik replies. “I need you to be careful, Alina. When Gavriil starts to lose control, he lashes out to protect himself. I don’t want you caught in the crossfire if he does.”
My stomach flips with nervousness at his warning, but deep down, I don’t believe that Gavriil would truly hurt me. Manipulate me and torment me? Sure. But he wouldn’t harm me.
I keep that thought to myself, though.
The cell door suddenly opens, and I automatically scoot closer to Dominik as two guards walk inside.
“Don’t,” Dominik warns them as they come closer.
It’s useless, though. Hands rip me away from Dominik’s side and drag me out of his cell despite our protests. I don’t even get a chance to look at him. No goodbye. No promise. Nothing before I’m taken out of the prison and back up to the bedroom.
None of this makes sense. Gavriil is moving me around like a chess piece, and I don’t think he has any clue what the hell he’s doing either.
When the guards lead me into the bedroom, I see Gavriil. He’s sprawled in his bed like a king who’s already won whatever game he’s playing.
I clench my jaw, a confusing mixture of desire and frustration hitting me.
“Where do you want to sleep tonight?” Gavriil asks me, gesturing to the cage and then his bed, the empty space next to him.
I feel that familiar tug that I shouldn’t. This time, I deny it, remembering Dominik and the time we just spent together. I’m not betraying him again, so I give Gavriil the answer that he doesn’t want to hear.
“The cage,” I say cold as steel. “Gladly. And if I find out you’re torturing Dominik, I’ll rip your dick off.”
A chuckle is his only response to my threat.