Chapter 18
18
Torrin
“T orrin, baby.”
The deep voice drifts in, tugging me from my dream. I smile at the roughened sound. It’s Lukas. My sweet, sexy stepbrother.
“Torrin, baby, I need you to open your eyes.”
I struggle to pry them open. It’s still dark in the room. I don’t think it’s morning yet.
“I need to get you back before Travis wakes up.”
I’m fully awake now. Sitting up. Eyes adjusting quickly to reality. The memory of last night floods in, and the tingles are prickling over me. I clear the sleep from my eyes and look at Lukas, hoping he’s still okay with what happened last night. God, he’s sexy in the morning. His hair a wild mess. His chin covered in scruff. His line of ripples on full display. I trail my eyes lower, seeing that something else is on display, saluting proudly in his boxers.
“Don’t look at me like that, babe. We need to get going.”
I reach out and run my fingers down his chest, along the coarse little hairs that disappear below his waistline. “I didn’t get to play with you last night.” I nearly passed out, drunk from the pleasure.
He stops my hand, and my stomach tightens. I don’t understand why he doesn’t want anything. He didn’t want anything last night either.
“You can’t touch. If you touch me, I won’t be able to stop, and I have to take you back.”
“What about later then?”
“As soon as practice is done this evening, I’m all yours.”
The nervous feeling fades, and I lean in. “I can’t wait.”
He shakes his head as a low rumble rolls from his chest. “You’re trouble, babe. Come on. It’s time to get dressed.”
Luke leaves me with a kiss on the forehead, heading into his bathroom, and I scramble to my feet, hunting around for my clothes. The ride back to my dorm is quiet, but I don’t know what to say. Thanking him for what he did last night feels awkward, and basic chatter seems silly. I sit back, opting for silence. It’s early and he probably doesn’t want to talk anyway.
The sun is starting to crest over the horizon, and the darkness is fading into a dusky hue. We turn into the parking lot of my dorm and Luke pulls into a spot, shutting off the car. He turns in his seat to face me.
“You’re awfully quiet this morning.” And so is he.
“You are too.”
“Are you okay with what happened?”
I nod, feeling the heat creep into my cheeks. “More than okay.” I’ve wanted it for so long, and it finally happened.
“You know this has to stay between us, right?” He doesn’t have to worry. This is not something I’m going to go blabbing about.
“I know what people would think, Luke. I’m not going to tell anyone.”
He lets out a low sigh as his head rests against the seat. “Would’ve been so much easier if you weren’t my stepsister.” I hold the same sentiment. Out of all the people I had to fall for, it had to be him. “How do we make this work, babe?”
I don’t know. I wish I had the answers and could wave a magic wand, but I can’t.
“I don’t know, Luke. But if you don’t want this… If you don’t want me…you have to tell me now.” I won’t be able to handle him walking away if things go much further.
His hand reaches out, and he tucks a hair behind my ear. “There’s not a question in my mind of whether I want you, Torrin. I’m just afraid. The world is against us, and I hate the idea of having to sneak around with you like you’re some dirty mistress. You deserve so much better.”
I scoot across the bench seat, moving in closer. “I kind of like being dirty.” His cheeks lift into one hell of a smirk and those dimples do heady things to my body. He has me swooning. “Just means that you’re going to have to behave in public, big brother. Means you have to resist the urge to kiss me.” I lean in and tease one against his lips. “Means you can’t touch.” I run my hands down his shirt, rubbing over the bulge that’s still hard as can be. “But when we’re alone…” I give him a squeeze over his pants, earning a groan. “You can be as dirty as you want with me.”
“Fuck, babe. You talking like that is going to get me into trouble.”
I actually kind of like the idea of us having to sneak around. Watching him from across the room, the need burning in his eyes, wondering how long it will take before he snaps and drags me someplace quiet then releases his pent-up tension on my body.
“You need to get inside before I fuck you in this truck. And before that roommate of yours wakes up.”
I tease him with another kiss, torturing myself with equal measure. “I’m not opposed to you fucking me in this truck.”
He breaths out a groan, sinking his tongue deep and kissing me until I’m panting. Then he pulls back, shaking his head.
“One day I will. But not for your first time. Now, I’ll call you later so we can figure out tonight.”
Sounds good.
I steal one last kiss and then I climb out, giving him a little wave before I disappear into my building, bounding up the stairs. I feel like I’m on cloud nine. There’s this huge weight lifted off my shoulders, and there’s a giddiness running through my veins. But it suddenly halts when I hear a noise coming from within my room. It sounds like Sophie’s in pain.
I quickly unlock the door and rush in. She’s whimpering and nearly thrashing in her sheets.
She’s having another nightmare. Another flashback from her past. But this one seems worse. I rush to her side and reach for her.
“Sophie!” I gently shake her arm. “It’s okay, Soph. You’re safe. Wake up! Please.” Her eyes fly open, looking panicked. “You’re okay, Soph. They will never hurt you again.”
She turns her head, looking around the room, making sure she’s safe. God, I hate what they did to her. I hate that anyone could be so cruel. She’s one of the sweetest people I know. And they terrorized her.
“Are you okay?” I squeeze her hands. I’m here. And I will never let anyone hurt her again. “That one was a bad one, huh?”
She swallows hard, and a tear slips down her cheek. “Sorry I woke you, Torre.”
“You didn’t wake me. Lukas just dropped me off.” The truth comes flying out, and I can’t retract the words. I’ve just never been one to lie. But I’ll fix it.
“Lukas?” She looks surprised. “I thought you hung out with Willow last night?”
“Lukas and Brennon ended up showing up and totally bogarted our entire evening.” I roll my eyes, trying to play it off. “Lukas claimed it was payback for crashing his party.”
“So, did you and Lukas make up?”
We definitely made up. I can still feel the remnants in my toes. His tongue. His lips. The way he held me close all night.
“Yeah, we’re good. So, tell me. How did the date go?”
I need to switch subjects before she sees the blush in my cheeks and starts to ask more questions. Then I really will have to make up a lie, and after everything she’s shared with me from her past, it feels wrong to betray her trust like that. Omission is one thing, but blatantly making up a story feels wrong.
“I’m going out with him again tonight.” She smiles, and now she’s the one blushing.
“Aww. Yay.” I clap my hands. “So how was last night? I take it it went well since he got you to agree to a second date.”
She starts to gush over Travis, and I can’t help but feel a twinge of envy. I can’t even share what happened between me and Lukas with her, or with anyone. No one would understand. Our friends, our parents—they’ll think we’re sick. And maybe we are. But I can’t stop my heart from beating for him.
* * *
The butterflies start whipping their little wings around when I see Lukas’s name lighting up my screen. I swipe right and answer.
“Hey!” I try to sound normal and not like the giddy little girl who’s doing a happy dance over the fact that he’s calling me.
“Hey, babe.” And I melt right down onto my bed. “So, I had a change of plans. Instead of me coming over there, what if I pick you up and we grab dinner then come back to my house for the movie marathon?”
“What? You don’t want to be seen hanging out with your little sister in the dorms?” Though, I kind of understand. My place is nowhere near as spacious, and my bed is way too small for the both of us.
He chuckles through the line and the deep rumble soothes my soul.
“I like hanging out with my sister. I think she’s cool as shit. What I don’t like is the idea of anyone hearing her make those sexy little noises as I get her off. Travis is going to be out with your roommate tonight, so we’ll have the place to ourselves.”
And now my panties are soaked.
“What time are you coming to get me?”
“I’m gonna shower up real quick then swing by. Can you be ready in thirty?”
“Been ready all day.”
His answering groan has me squeezing my legs together. If he weren’t coming to get me soon, I’d have to run my fingers between my legs and take care of the aching problem.
“Make that twenty. And pack a bag, Torre. You’re staying the night.”
As soon as we hang up, I squeal into my pillow. He wants me to spend the night. This is really happening.