Chapter 24
24
Torrin
T he crowd erupts in a roaring applause and my heart beats fast. They won. They actually did it. It was a blur. Travis passed the ball to Luke. Luke broke free from the line and then made the most perfect throw to Brennon. Who turned and made a beeline for the end zone, scoring the winning touchdown. Willow is shouting, she’s so happy. I don’t ever think I’ve heard her speak loudly. And there isn’t a single stutter as she cheers for her man.
Brennon looks right at her, and she breaks off from our crowd, running to him. I turn, scanning the chaos for Lukas. But I don’t have to look far. His arm wraps around my waist and he scoops me up, spinning me in the air.
“We did it, babe. We won! We fucking won! God, I love you so much. We did it!” I’m laughing in his excitement, feeling his high, until…his mouth crashes down on mine, giving me a kiss, completely having forgotten the fact that our parents are here. Standing right behind us. I push against his shoulders, trying to pull away.
“Lukas, don’t!”
He looks down at me, not understanding what the problem is. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“Our parents,” I whisper, right as Walter’s deep voice booms behind us.
“Son. I think you’ve gotten carried away. You need to put your sister down, go celebrate this win with your team, and afterwards, we’ll be waiting at the house.”
Lukas’s face blanches. His entire frame turning rigid. The excitement of the win ripped away. He slowly lowers me back to the ground, looking like he’s seen a ghost. His stare is completely haunted. “I’m sorry, Torre. Go on back over with your mom, and I’ll see you when I’m done.”
I don’t have a good feeling about this. My stomach is churning with this terrifying feeling.
“Please enjoy your win,” I tell him. “You worked so hard for this.”
I hate that the happiness he was just feeling has been replaced with the look of pure anguish. He was so caught up feeling the high, he got carried away. All the other guys get to hug and kiss their girls; he should be able to too.
“Torrin. Come. Now.”
Dread gets caught in my throat at the sound of my mom’s sharp command. I gulp it down and turn, walking straight back to her side, eyes trained at the ground. I can’t bear to see the looks on our friends’ faces. I don’t want to see the pure disgust or their anger toward my brother. Walter is seething, and it’s all directed toward Lukas. My mom is horrified. Directed toward Lukas. And I can’t bear to look up and see the expression because I don’t want to direct my tears toward him.
I’m dreading the drive back to his house. I wish he were going to be with me.
We walk out of the dome, fighting past the excited crowd. Pushing through the upward stream of chaos. We didn’t even get to celebrate with him. He got one brief moment of joy before it was torn away. I wish I had dodged the kiss, but I didn’t see it coming. And once his lips landed down, his love was pouring in, mixing with the shock and it took me longer than it should’ve to stop him.
As soon as we’re closed in their vehicle, the cheers no longer echoing in the distance, Walter turns. “You need to tell me one thing, Torrin. Did my son do anything inappropriate while you were growing up?”
What?! Did he do anything while I was growing up? Never. Lukas would never do something like that. He’s not some disgusting pervert. How could they even ask me that? How could they think it?
“No! I can’t even believe you could think such a thing. He’s not some kind of sick predator. Things started a few months ago. We didn’t mean for this to happen. And he tried to stop it. We both did. But…I’m the one who pushed. And…we fell in love.”
“No,” my mom states like that word is capable of severing the feelings I have. “It’s wrong, Torrin. You’re confused. You moved away from home and were looking for comfort, and now you’re confusing your feelings for your brother.”
“He’s my stepbrother.” I have to say it, only because I can’t have them thinking I’ve forgotten the fact that we don’t share the same DNA. We may be sick, but we’re not that sick. But both look horrified. Like they’ve forgotten the truth.
“Whether you’re blood related or not, we’re a family. He should’ve known better. He crossed a line,” Walter seethes.
“We both crossed a line. And he was the one who tried to stop it from happening. But we couldn’t stop feeling what we were feeling.” They’re acting like this is all his fault. He’s not the only one to blame here. I was right there with him burning in the flames. I knew it was wrong, but I still wanted it.
“He’s supposed to protect you,” my mother says, her lip quivering. “He was supposed to look out for you, not…” Her words break off into a sob, and Walter reaches for her.
“It’s okay, Sheryll. I’m going to handle this. He’s no longer welcome in our home.”
“No! What? You can’t do that. He’s your son. He’s my brother. We’re a family.”
“He didn’t act like your brother. He didn’t respect our family. And I no longer want him around. I taught him better. Whoever this person is disgusts me, and I no longer want him around you. You two are going to end things now. You are going to forget this ever happened. Or I will cut off your tuition. Understand?”
For the first time since knowing Walter, I see him as an outsider. He can cut me off if he wants; I can take out a loan or get financial aid. He’s not my father and he’s no longer going to tell me what to do. I’m an adult. Lukas and I love each other, and if Walter has a problem with that, so be it. Nothing he does or says is going to change the way I feel, and I’m not letting Lukas go. That would be like ripping my heart out and crushing it to pieces. I won’t survive without my beating pulse.
He turns and starts the car, and the tension builds with each roll of the tires as he takes us back to the house. The silence is only broken by the sound of angered breathing. As soon as we’re parked, I’m out of the car and storming inside, going straight to Lukas’s room. I can’t even look at them right now. They don’t understand and they aren’t willing to listen. I’m going to wait until Lukas gets home so we can both get them to see our point.
I pace the room, panicked. Hating that Lukas is probably freaking out while all his teammates are all celebrating their victory. I hate that instead of going out and having fun tonight, he has to come back to hell. Walter may kick him out of the family, but I will never abandon Lukas. And when he gets here, I’m going to tell them that if they ever want to see us again, they have to accept that we’re together because I’m not giving up the best thing in my life.
I hear a truck pull into the driveway and I know it’s him. The sadness grows thicker. He didn’t even stay for the media interviews or the champagne toast. He didn’t get to enjoy a single moment. I rush out of the room as he rushes into the house.
“We need to have a talk, Lukas,” Walter states in that cold tone, which has my nerves freezing over with a feeling akin to hatred. I’ve never seen this side of him before. I’m trying to see it from his point of view, understanding that he’s worried and in shock, but he won’t even take a moment to listen. If he let us explain, we could tell him how we desperately fought the feelings. Neither of us wanted to give in. But that’s how strong our love is for each other; even knowing what we were going to face, we couldn’t stop it.
“I know what you’re going to say, Dad. I know I shouldn’t have done it.”
“You’re supposed to be her big brother and look out for her. You’re not supposed to take advantage of the girl. You preyed on your sister. She’s young and na?ve and doesn’t know any better. But you do.”
I can’t stand it anymore. They keep acting like he’s some kind of sick monster. And that I’m an immature child incapable of making decisions.
“He didn’t prey on me,” I shout. “Quit blaming all of this on him. I wanted it too. He tried to prevent things from happening between us, but I...”
“No, Torre,” Luke cuts me off. “He’s right. I never should’ve crossed a line. I knew better, and I should’ve protected you.”
I don’t understand. We’ve been through this. We both knew what we were signing up for. We both knew what the consequences could be if our parents found out, and we still decided to go forward. He doesn’t need to feel guilty.
“You’re no longer welcome in our house, Lukas. And things between you two end now.”
“Yes, sir.” Luke nods. He looks like his world has just burned to the ground. Like everything he’s ever cared about has been stolen from him. His father may want to cut him out of his life, but not me. I’m not leaving him. They can say what they want, but I’m not going to abandon him or give up what we have. Maybe in time they’ll accept it, maybe they won’t, but I can’t imagine a world without him.
“If he’s no longer welcome, then we both aren’t. We love each other, and just because you can’t accept that, doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Maybe one day you’ll let us sit down and explain our side of the story, but until then, you’re not going to hear from either of us.”
“No, Torrin,” Luke states, his tone scaring me. “They’re right. This needs to end. It shouldn’t have begun in the first place.”
How can he say that? What we have is something rare and indescribable. Even now that the world knows and is against us, I still have no regrets. They can have their opinion, but it doesn’t change how I feel. It could never taint something so perfect.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I’m sorry to all of you.”
“No!” I move to him. “Quit apologizing. And don’t say that. It’s not over. They don’t under…”
“Torrin, stop,” my mother interjects. “He’s doing the right thing. Let him. You’re too young to understand, but it’s not just about what we think. It’s what the world thinks. Lukas is going to be drafted into the NFL next year. He can’t have it getting out that he’s dating his sister.”
“Stepsister,” I whisper, but she’s right.
“It would destroy his career. You need to let this go. And one day, you’ll realize that this was just your teenage hormones that got led astray. You’re young. You’ve hardly experienced life. We all have first loves, but they don’t last. And with the pressure of the world against you two, it won’t work.”
She’s wrong. It’s not my hormones. It’s not some stupid crush. I love him with all my heart. These feelings aren’t going to fade.
I turn to Lukas, ignoring our parents.
“I love you more than anything, Luke, and I will do anything to make sure your career isn’t ruined. I’d change my name back to my father’s if that’s what it takes.”
I hear my mother’s gasp in the background. I’m not trying to hurt Walter—he’s been an amazing father—but if that’s what it takes to make sure no one finds out Lukas and I are related, I would do that.
“It’s your decision, Lukas. Not theirs. So, what do you want? Deep down, what does your heart truly want?”
Please let it be me. Please pick me . But the look in his eyes is slowly breaking down my hope. The fear starts to tremble through me. I already know what’s coming.
“Your mom is right, Torrin. I love you, but this is better for the both of us. We got carried away, but it’s never going to work. It’s over. And I’m so sorry I ever let it begin.”
The crack forms in my chest, splintering right down the center. My world crumbling right before me. I can’t breathe. I can’t see past the tears. I don’t understand. Things were so perfect. This morning, he woke me up with the sweetest kiss, telling me how much he loved me, and now… Now, it was all just some big mistake.
I rush out the door, running to my car. I never want to see any of them again.
“Torrin!” My mother’s shout knocks me down further. They did this. We were so happy. Everything was perfect. She even said it herself. How happy Luke has been, but they just stole that away from us. They’ve brainwashed him into thinking it won’t work. “Torrin!”
I get in my car, struggling to wipe the tears. I don’t care what she wants. Nothing she has to say is going to fix my broken heart. Nothing is going to change his mind.