Chapter 37
This apartment is still the same.
The same soft beige walls.
The same small balcony where the morning sunlight falls.
The same wooden table near the window.
But the feeling?
Not the same.
The silence here is different.
Heavier.
Lonelier.
I move around the kitchen quietly, placing Leo’s food into his bowl. The moment it touches the floor, he rushes toward it happily, his tail wagging like nothing in the world has changed.
I crouch beside him, running my fingers through his fur while he eats.
“At least you’re happy,” I murmur softly.
Leo lets out a small huff between bites as if responding to me.
A tired smile forms on my lips.
India was supposed to feel like home.
Safe.
Comforting.
But every night when the apartment becomes quiet, my mind drifts back to Italy.
Back to him.
I push the thought away and slowly stand up, placing a hand on the kitchen counter as a small wave of dizziness passes through me.
It’s been happening more often these days.
Before I can think too much about it—
Knock.
The sound echoes through the apartment.
I freeze.
For a moment I think maybe I imagined it.
Knock. Knock.
My heart suddenly starts beating faster.
I walk slowly toward the door, confusion filling my chest. No one really visits me here. Only the landlord sometimes.
My hand wraps around the handle.
And I open it.
The world seems to stop.
Lorenzo stands there.
His chest rises and falls heavily like he ran all the way here. His hair is slightly messy, his dark eyes searching my face like he’s making sure I’m real.
For a moment neither of us move.
Neither of us speak.
“Lorenzo…” I whisper, shock flooding through me.
His jaw tightens.
“There you are.”
My heart pounds painfully in my chest as reality crashes down on me.
“You shouldn’t be here,” I say quickly, stepping back slightly.
His eyes darken.
“I searched an entire country for you,” he says, his voice rough. “And the first thing you say is that I shouldn’t be here?”
“You need to leave,” I insist, trying to keep my voice steady.
Leo suddenly runs toward the door, barking excitedly when he recognizes Lorenzo.
Lorenzo’s gaze flickers briefly to the dog before returning to me.
“You disappeared,” he says slowly. “No message. No explanation.”
“I had my reasons.”
“And those reasons were?”
“That’s none of your business anymore.”
The words leave my mouth before I can stop them.
Something dangerous flashes across his face.
“You’re my wife,” he says sharply.
“Not in this country.”
The silence that follows is thick.
“You ran halfway across the world to hide from me,” Lorenzo says, stepping closer.
“I didn’t hide,” I reply stubbornly.
His eyes narrow.
“Then why are you shaking?”
I open my mouth to argue back, but the words never come out.
The room suddenly tilts slightly.
A wave of dizziness crashes into me again, stronger this time.
I grab the edge of the table to steady myself.
Lorenzo notices immediately.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing,” I breathe out, trying to straighten.
“You look like you’re about to collapse.”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re lying.”
“Lorenzo, just leave—”
The sentence never finishes.
The floor suddenly disappears beneath my feet.
Everything goes dark.
“Ruhi!”
Lorenzo catches me before I hit the ground.
Panic flashes across his face as he lowers me onto the couch.
“Ruhi, wake up.”
No response.
His hands shake slightly as he brushes hair away from my face.
“Ruhi.”
Still nothing.
“Fuck.”
Within minutes he’s carrying me out of the apartment.
Bright hospital lights fill the room.
Doctors move quickly around the bed while Lorenzo stands nearby, his fists clenched tightly at his sides.
“Is she okay?” he demands.
The doctor finishes checking the monitor before turning toward him.
“Are you her husband?”
“Yes.”
The doctor studies him for a moment.
“She fainted from exhaustion and stress,” he explains calmly.
Lorenzo exhales slightly.
But the doctor isn’t finished.
“And there’s something else you should know.”
Lorenzo’s eyes narrow.
“What.”
The doctor glances briefly at Ruhi lying unconscious on the bed before looking back at him.
“Your wife is pregnant.”
The words hang in the air.
For a moment Lorenzo doesn’t move.
Doesn’t breathe.
“Pregnant?” he repeats quietly.
“Yes.”
The doctor nods.
“Approximately a month”
The doctor’s words echo in my head long after he finishes speaking.
Pregnant.
Ruhi is pregnant.
For a moment I just stand there, staring at her lying on the hospital bed. Her face looks pale against the white pillow, her dark hair spread across it like ink.
My mind feels strangely blank.
Then suddenly it isn’t.
A rush of emotions crashes into my chest so fast it almost steals the air from my lungs.
Pregnant.
My child.
Ruhi is carrying my child.
A quiet, disbelieving laugh escapes me before I can stop it. I drag a hand down my face, trying to steady my breathing.
I should feel shocked.
Maybe angry.
Maybe confused.
Instead, something warm spreads through my chest. Something powerful.
Something terrifying.
Happiness.
My gaze moves back to her stomach, still flat beneath the hospital blanket. It’s strange knowing that there’s a life growing there.
Mine.
Ours.
A small, dangerous smile slowly forms on my lips.
“So you ran away with my baby,” I murmur under my breath.
My eyes soften as I look at her again.
Ruhi stirs slightly on the bed.
The movement instantly pulls my attention back to her. I step closer just as her eyelids flutter open slowly.
Her gaze is unfocused at first, adjusting to the bright lights of the hospital room.
Then her eyes land on me.
And they widen slightly.
“You…” her voice comes out weak.
I lean forward slightly, resting my forearms on the edge of the bed.
“You fainted.”
Her brows pull together as she looks around the room.
“The hospital?”
“Yes.”
For a moment neither of us speaks.
Then I say it.
“You’re pregnant.”
The words hang between us.
Ruhi’s eyes close slowly.
“I know,” she whispers.
My brows pull together.
“You knew?”
“Yes.”
Her voice is quiet now.
“I found out before I left.”
Silence fills the room again.
Then she slowly looks back at me, something guarded in her eyes.
“You don’t have to worry,” she says softly.
My jaw tightens slightly.
“What does that mean?”
“It means you don’t have to feel responsible,” she continues. “I know you don’t want children.”
The words hit me harder than I expect.
For a moment I just stare at her.
Then I shake my head slowly.
“Who told you that?”
Her eyes flash slightly.
“You did.”
Realization hits me instantly.
The office.
That conversation with Alexander.
Ruhi must have heard it.
“Ruhi—”
“You were very clear,” she interrupts quietly. “Children aren’t part of your plan.”
Something dark and frustrated twists in my chest.
I run a hand through my hair before leaning closer to her.
“That’s not what you think.”
She gives me a tired look.
“Lorenzo—”
“I want children.”
The words leave my mouth before she can finish.
Ruhi freezes.
Her eyes search my face like she’s trying to see if I’m lying.
“You… what?”
“I want children,” I repeat calmly.
My hand slowly moves to rest on the edge of the bed beside her.
“I didn’t want a child growing up in the life I grew up in,” I explain quietly. “That’s what I meant.”
Her expression softens slightly, but confusion still lingers.
“And now?”
I lean closer, my voice dropping low.
“Now I know something.”
Her brows knit together.
“What?”
A faint smirk touches my lips as my gaze drifts briefly toward her stomach.
“I'll spoil them rotten"
“I don’t want children,” I said to Alexander.
He raised an eyebrow slowly, leaning back in his chair like he had all the time in the world.
“Is that so?” he asked casually. “And why’s that?”
I exhaled slowly, running a hand through my hair as I stared out the window of the office. The city lights flickered below us, cold and distant.
“Don’t you know?” I said quietly. “The chances of the mother dying is much higher than people think.”
Alexander didn’t answer immediately.
For once, he didn’t joke.
He just watched me.
“You’re afraid,” he said finally.
It wasn’t a question.
My jaw tightened.
“Yes.”
The word left my mouth before I could stop it.
Alexander tilted his head slightly.
“Of what exactly?”
I stayed silent for a moment, my eyes still fixed on the city outside.
“Something happening to Ruhi,” I said finally, my voice quieter now.
The words felt strange coming out loud.
Vulnerable.
“I’ve seen too much death in my life,” I continued. “Too many things go wrong. Too many people disappear.”
Alexander’s expression softened slightly.
“And you think having a child will cause that?”
“I think losing her would destroy me.”
The room fell silent again.
My fingers tapped slowly against the desk as another thought crossed my mind.
“And there’s something else.”
Alexander raised an eyebrow again.
“What?”
I looked down at my hands.
“This life.”
The word felt heavy.
“The enemies. The danger. The blood.”
My jaw clenched slightly.
“I grew up in that world,” I said. “I know exactly what it does to a child.”
Alexander watched me carefully.
“You don’t want your kid living the same life you did.”
“No.”
For a moment, neither of us spoke.
Then something strange happened.
Despite everything I had just said… despite the fear sitting heavy in my chest…
A small image appeared in my mind.
Uninvited.
Unexpected.
A child.
Small.
Dark hair like mine.
Eyes like Ruhi’s.
Running between us.
Laughing.
Ruhi standing nearby, smiling softly while holding the child’s tiny hand.
My lips twitched slightly.
Alexander noticed immediately.
“What?” he asked suspiciously.
I shook my head slowly, the faintest smile still lingering on my face.
“Nothing.”
But the image refused to disappear.
A child.
Ours.
Standing between me and Ruhi.
Alexander watches me for a long moment.
His eyes narrow slightly, like he’s trying to read something I’m not saying.
“You know,” he says slowly, leaning back in the chair, “for someone who claims he doesn’t want children…”
His gaze flickers to the faint smile still lingering on my face.
“You look suspiciously like a man imagining one.”
My smirk fades slightly.
I look away, back toward the window.
“That’s not the point.”
Alexander lets out a quiet chuckle.
“No, Lorenzo. I think it is.”
The office grows quiet again.
Then he asks the question.
“So tell me honestly.”
His voice is calmer now.
“If the fear disappeared… if nothing could happen to Ruhi…”
He pauses.
“Would you still not want children?”
The question hangs in the air.
For the first time, I don’t answer immediately.
Instead, that same image returns to my mind.
Ruhi.
Standing in the sunlight.
A small child beside her, holding her hand.
Laughing.
Running toward me.
Something warm spreads through my chest before I can stop it.
I lean back slightly in my chair, exhaling slowly.
“If I ever had a child,” I say quietly.
Alexander waits.
My voice lowers.
“I wouldn’t treat them the way men in my world treat their children.”
My fingers tap once against the desk.
“I wouldn’t raise them with fear.”
Another small pause.
“They would never have to earn my love.”
Alexander’s expression changes slightly.
I look back at him.
“If Ruhi and I ever had a child…”
The words come out softer than I expected.
“I’d cherish them.”
The office grows completely silent.
“I’d make sure they grow up knowing they’re loved every single day.”
My jaw tightens slightly.
“I’d protect them from this world for as long as I possibly could.”
Alexander studies me carefully.
“And if they still ended up in your world?”
My gaze hardens slightly.
“Then I’d make sure they were strong enough to survive it.”
A faint smile appears on my face again.
“But no matter what happens…”
I glance down briefly before finishing.
“They would always know one thing.”
Alexander raises an eyebrow.
“What’s that?”
I lean back in my chair, the faint smile still there.
“That their father loves them more than anything in this world.”